I hope you had a good day .

My days are so lonely.

Barbara

Hi Chicago Beard ...

 

Thanks for letting me know about ulcerated colitis.  I think I have GERD.  I have done much research in the past two months re grief and find that everything in our body goes wacko (hormonal) when we are grieving.  I can certainly believe it.  I'll be seeing the doc on Tuesday and as far as looking for another doc our system in British Columbia has a shortage of GP's and other docs and feeling as I do I just can't climb one more mountain of bureaucracy while still grieving for my beloved spouse.  One thing I have learned ... God is either going to get me through this or it's time for me to go and as strange as that sounds it does bring some comfort as far as taking the stress off me and hopefully others.  I was strong before and I will be again.  Thank you to everyone on here for your kind support as it has saved me from going totally over the edge.

 

Love and my prayers to everyone here

 

Marcy

Read your post about your anniversary.  I am glad it wasn't as difficult as you expected and that you are making some progress in the grieving process.  I haven't had to deal with the anniversary yet - my husband's birthday is on Father's Day though.  I am not looking forward to that day at all...

Thank you so much for your kind words and good suggestion.  Isn't that true, so much easier to talk with strangers, with counsellors, than your own family.  Things get so complicated.  When you read other posts also they do reflect the same issues, that is feeling like a burden, being afraid to ask for help, not wanting to, etc.   We had a happier day today and she is expecting a baby any day now and emotions are pretty visible.  She and I started talking about her dad and she said how sad she was that she couldn't be sharing her happiness and the baby with her dad but then we both said that he was watching from heaven and he would know he will have a beautiful and loving grandchild who will remind us of him and his kind heart.

Do you like to read?  I find it so helpful and comforting to me.   Yes, nothing is the same any more, but each day I know my dear sweetheart is right there with me, bringing me through on those rough days and supporting me thru the others.

 

p.s. you look like such a cute couple! a fun and loving relationship.

 

Hugs,

Carol

 

 

I agree, I feel that I am on a roller coaster every day.  The ups and downs, there seems to be more downs than ups.  The next few weeks are going to be difficult, June 19 is our wedding anniversay - it would have been seven years (together for 20), then I have his birthday July 1st, he would have been 57.  I usually just hole up in the house during this time, not want to go or do anything.  But this year my grandchildren talked me into taking them on vacation in June, so I will be with them which does help.  If I am rambling I am sorry, its just that this seems to be the only place I can discuss how I am feeling without hearing, get over it, its been 2.5 years, you need to move on.  All I can say to them is that I hope you never have to go through this and if you do, let me see you move on.

What a good description: Grief comes in waves. That so describes it for me. Anywhere from a lap to a tsunami. I often think of a roller coaster....

Thank you for your comment. May god bless you.

It would depend on when, etc.  I help raise two grandchildren who have cystic fibrosis.  Their mother died 5 1/2 years ago so my husband and I were helping our youngest son raise our grandchildren.  He was taking them to school Nov. 5th when they were in an accident with a semi that killed my husband.  Thankfully the children were okay (physcially) emotionally this has been very hard on them.  They are so afraid I might die now.