Class of '92 (2013)

Red: My Autobiography By Gary Neville (Bantam Press 2011)

Jaap Stam was sold, which was a bombshell as big as Sparky leaving, even for the players – especially for the players. We were as mystified as anyone. All kinds of conspiracies swirled around because Jaap’s exit came on the back of his ‘controversial’ autobiography; but I’ve always believed that the book was a minor factor, perhaps irrelevant. I know the manager wasn’t thrilled about the book, and nor was I at being called a ‘busy cunt’. Jaap had called me that to my face many times, and I know it was meant affectionately, but it didn’t look quite so clever spread across the front of the Daily Mirror.

He was very apologetic, because he was a big softie at heart, a big playful bear. Phil, Butty and I used to wind him up by flicking his ears or tapping him on the back of the head so he’d run after us, like a father chasing after a naughty kid. He didn’t mean any harm with the book, he’d just not thought through the consequences of serialisation, when little passages get blown up into big stories. As I explained to him, you can say Ruud van Nistelrooy was selfish when he was near goal but the headline won’t explain how that selfishness was part of his brilliance.

People came up with their conspiracy theories for Jaap’s exit, but all that counted was that the manager had lost confidence in him – a mistake, as he’d later admit. He thought Jaap had lost a bit of pace, and was dropping off. But even if that was partly true, he remained an immense presence for us in defence. He was missed.

Tenderness

With reference to this photo:

I love the exasperated cry from 'WackAttack' in the comments box of today's Five things we learned from the Premier League this weekend column:

Thanks for putting that photo up on two different stories. One of my colleagues just walked past and commented
"Are you still looking at that picture?"

The picture captures in all its glory the love that dares not speak its name: all of us non Man Utd supporters who want United to win their fourth Premier League title in a row at the expense of Chelski.

News Just In

Neville's agent has issued a press release and stated that the photograph is nothing more than a misunderstanding. The kiss is not what you think it is. Apparently it's an old library photo of Neville and Scholes, when they were playing a game of charades in between training sessions, and they were acting out 'the whole thing'

A Revolution of Two Halves

Leftist Kult Kuts (III)

I guess it's one for the knowledge corner of the footie section of the Guardian, but has there ever been any bona fide anarcho-footballers?

Every other day, someone finds the blog via a google search of 'Gary Neville' and 'socialism', and every leftist transpotter who has ever used his anorak for a makeshift goalpost knows about Jackie McNamara (sr) being a member of the old CPGB; Paul Breitner thinking the cultural revolution was more about Mao's bloodthirsty dictatorship than seventies Dutch 'total football'; Livorno's Cristiano Lucarelli being a fan of Che; and my piss poor attempt at trying to claim Tony Higgins for the SPGB (well, anyone who reads the blog), but any noted anarchist footballers?

I don't think so off the top of my head, though I'm sure someone will try and make a case for such front page/back page luminaries as Mickey Thomas, Stan Bowles or Ramon Quiroga as honorary anarchists but unless they can show me the receipts for their subscription to Freedom, I'll continue to peg them as the pisshead, the gambler and the cheat (mmm, sounds like the title of a Jimmy Webb song).

The best I can come up with is that I seem to remember that Eduardo Galeano mentioned something in his footie book, 'Soccer in Sun and Shadow', about Argentinos Juniors - Diego Maradona's* first club - originally being called the 'Chicago Martyrs', in honour of the anarchists framed, and then executed, in the aftermath of the 1886 Haymarket bombing but, christ, that was about a hundred years ago. A forgotten era of quorate SPGB branch meetings, Mugsborough and a slimline Chic Charnley making his debut for Third Lanark.

Therefore, it was a tonic to read of the anarchos/libertarian communists down in the south coast winning their recent footie grudge match against the local Brighton branch of the Millies. A 4-1 spanking, and that after the Red and White Taafite Army were 1-0 up at half time, which is surely a reversal of history in the relations between the anarchists and the bolsheviks?

The usual post-match analysis between these two sides chews over the fact that it's the 'meninblack' who make the running early on - Petrograd 1917; Barcelona 1936; Paris 1968; The Coronet Pub, Holloway Road 2003 - only for the vanguard to wear them down late on in the second half with their deft use of supersub(stitutionism) . . . placards, petitions and paper sales.

Does this mean that the Spanish anarchist team have finally found the stamina and 'bottle' to win the big tournaments? Or are they just 'homers'? Who, once they play away from home - Urban 75 noticeboards, Graduate Common Rooms, suburbia, shouty anarcho-punk gigs - will crumble quicker than you can sing,'You're going home in a class war ambulance'?

And whilst I'm on the subject of politics and footie, why are there so many Chelsea and Fulham fans in the SPGB?

So many questions, and yet I feel they will remain unanswered.

*Of course, Maradona is known for his Che Guevera tattoo on the bicep of his right arm. Sadly, it's not connected to the 'hand of god'.

Gary Neville and Socialism #2

Strangely enough, I'm still getting a lot of traffic from people googling to see whether or not Gary Neville is a socialist. Who would have thought that a piss poor Frank Skinner joke could penetrate so deeply into the English footballing psyche . . . again?

To clear the matter up once and for all, Gary Neville has never been to a business meeting of the Manchester branch of the SPGB. However, that might be because the branch have their meetings on a Monday night and, as everyone knows, Sky always insist that Man Utd play their games on a Monday. You draw your own conclusions . . .

Gary Neville and Socialism

For some reason the blog has recently been getting a lot of traffic via a google search of the words "Gary Neville + socialism". So, suitably intrigued, I did a little digging myself. What did I find? Bugger all: nothing more than a passing joke from a Baddiel and Skinner podcast, and this quote from a Chris Bambery article in an old issue of the Socialist Worker that I found online:

""This is not about millionaire footballers wanting more money. It's about supporting a union that funds lads who don't make the grade and need to retrain, and 60 year old ex-pros who need a heart operation but can't afford it." So said Manchester United and England defender Gary Neville last Thursday, before the compromise between the Football League and the Professional Footballers' Association (PFA) that averted this week's threatened strike."

This is my roundabout way of saying that the Leftist Trainspotters Group now has a MySpace page.

You knew there had to be a point to this post? Well, that was it.