Chef de cuisine

Intimate Semaphores (2013)

Actors: Martin Pfefferkorn (actor), Kate Lyn Sheil (actress), T.J. Misny (editor), Jocelin Donahue (actress), Abbi Jacobson (actress), T.J. Misny (writer), T.J. Misny (director), T.J. Misny (producer), Robert McKay (actor), Ilana Glazer (actress), Betsy Aidem (actress), Rob Michael Hugel (actor), Jennifer Kim (actress), Keith Poulson (actor), Feifei Ling (producer),

Genres: Comedy, Drama,

Hollywood & Wine (2011)

Actors: Colleen Camp (actress), Chazz Palminteri (actor), David Spade (actor), Pamela Anderson (actress), John W. Iwanonkiw (actor), Chris Parnell (actor), Horatio Sanz (actor), John Farley (actor), Miguel A. Núñez Jr. (actor), Chris Kattan (actor), Jeremy London (actor), Norm MacDonald (actor), Kevin P. Farley (actor), Leslie Easterbrook (actress), Tracy Dali (actress),

Plot: Diane Blaine has the face of a movie star. Unfortunately, fallen star/tabloid queen Jamie Stephens already made it famous. Hollywoods constant rejection due to what Diane refers to as "TJS" ("Too Jamie Stephens") has made her bitter, frustrated....and, yes, whiny. Co-worker/boyfriend Jack Sanders doesn't help matters. His idea of ambition is letting it ride. Now he's in major debt to a trigger-happy mobster who, interestingly enough, has a thing for Jamie Stephens. Jack's only way out? Convince Diane to be Jamie and wipe out the debt having one meal with a made man. It's literally the performance of her life. With Jack's on the line.

Genres: Comedy,
Taglines: Fake It 'Til You Make It ...

Return of the Jackalope (2006)

Actors: Dave R. Watkins (actor), Dave R. Watkins (actor), Mark Oliver (actor), Steve Warren (actor), Ron McLellen (actor), Martin L. Kelley (actor), Robert Hatch (actor), Matt Cornwell (actor), Chris Burns (actor), Chris Burns (actor), Chris Burns (actor), Ernie Hudson (actor), Michael D. Friedman (actor), Chris Burns (producer), Debi Derryberry (actress),

Plot: In 1995, brothers Jimmy Ray Johnson and Bobby Ray Johnson collaborated to produce the horror movie "Curse of the Jackalope." The film was purchased at the Lula (GA) International Film Festival and Barbeque Cook-Off by producer Richard McCovey and released into theaters by his company, McCovey Pictures. Amid bad reviews and a disastrous distribution, the film grossed a total of $17 at the box office. Over time, the film has gained a hint of notoriety as the "lowest grossing film of all time." Richard McCovey Jr has taken over his father's company, with grand plans of re-releasing the film. But first, he has to reunite the cast & crew for the ten-year Anniversary screening, an event he's dubbed "Jackalope X."

Keywords: b-movie, fake-documentary, film-industry, film-within-a-film, georgia-usa, improvisation, jackalope, mockumentary, reunion
Genres: Comedy, Horror,
Taglines: A movie about people who shouldn't make movies.

Along Came Polly (2004)

Actors: Masi Oka (actor), Michael Shamberg (actor), Kevin Hart (actor), Nick Jameson (actor), Judah Friedlander (actor), Jeffrey Ross (actor), Philip Seymour Hoffman (actor), James DuMont (actor), Bryan Brown (actor), Mark Adair-Rios (actor), Hank Azaria (actor), Jsu Garcia (actor), Alec Baldwin (actor), Ben Stiller (actor), Theodore Shapiro (actor),

Plot: Reuben Feffer thinks he's found the love of his life but on his honeymoon he discovers her cheating on him with a scuba instructor. Reuben travels back home to get his life on track. On a night out with best pal, Sandy Lyle, Reuben discovers an old school friend, Polly Prince. Reuben feels a connection straight away, and tries constantly to get her to like him. But it's not going to be easy for Reuben, especially when he spends his days calculating risks, and when someone unexpected turns up.

Keywords: actor, adultery, airliner, airplane, anger, answering-machine, apartment-advertisement, art-gallery, audience, bagpipes
Genres: Comedy, Romance,
Taglines: For the most cautious man on Earth, life is about to get interesting.

Quotes:

Sandy Lyle: Reuben, I'm in a situation here. We have to leave now.::Reuben Feffer: No. Can we stay a couple more minutes?::Sandy Lyle: Dude, no. This is serious. I just sharted.::Reuben Feffer: I don't know what that means.::Sandy Lyle: I tried to fart and a little shit came out. I just sharted. Now let's go.::Reuben Feffer: You're the most disgusting person I've ever met in my life.

Polly Prince: You wanna come upstairs and have sex?::Reuben Feffer: Huh?::Polly Prince: I'm kidding!

[repeated line]::Stan Indursky: Good things.

Sandy Lyle: [shooting basketball] Raindrop! [basketball bounces off the backboard]

Irving Feffer: It's not about what happened in the past, or what you think might happen in the future. It's about the ride, for Christ's sake. There is no point in going through all this crap, if your are not going to enjoy the ride. And you know what... when you least expect something great might come along. Something better then you even planned for.

Polly Prince: I've been living my life, okay? I've been in good relationships and I've been in shitty ones... and I've moved alot... and I've been happy, and I've been sad... and I've been lonely... and that is what I've been doing. Which is a lot more then I can say for some freak, who thinks he's gonna get the Ebola virus from a bowl of mixed nuts.

Reuben Feffer: I know that I have a .013% chance of being hit by a car on my way home. Or a one in 46,000 chance of falling through a subway grate. So I try to manage that risk by avoiding danger and having a plan and knowing what my next move is. And I guess you don't exactly live your life that way. Yeah... which is great, but I'm not gonna ever be a dirty dancer, and I don't eat food with my hands, and I really like you, but I just don't think this is gonna work out.

Reuben Feffer: Since we have been together I have felt more uncomfortable, out of place, embarassed, and just physically sick then I have in my entire life. But I could not have gone through that, I could not have thrown up 19 times in 48 days if I was not in love with you.

Claude: Luban! Look me in my eyeball. I treat her like my own flesh and blood.

[first lines]::Reuben Feffer: [practicing] I, Reuben, take you, Lisa... I, Reuben, take YOU, Lisa, to be my lawfully wedded wife. I do. I do.

Mr. Deeds (2002)

Actors: Bruce French (actor), Adam Sandler (actor), John McEnroe (actor), Peter Gallagher (actor), Blake Clark (actor), Jared Harris (actor), Erick Avari (actor), David Boston (actor), Allen Covert (actor), Steven Brill (actor), Erik Betts (actor), Steve Buscemi (actor), Eric Bruno Borgman (actor), Al Sharpton (actor), Rob Schneider (actor),

Plot: When Longfellow Deeds, a small-town pizzeria owner and poet, inherits $40 billion from his deceased uncle, he quickly begins rolling in a different kind of dough. Moving to the big city, Deeds finds himself besieged by opportunists all gunning for their piece of the pie. Babe, a television tabloid reporter, poses as an innocent small-town girl to do an exposé on Deeds. Of course, Deeds' sincere naiveté has Babe falling in love with him instead. Ultimately, Deeds comes to find that money truly has the power to change things, but it doesn't necessarily need to change him.

Keywords: abbreviation-in-title, apple-tree, bare-butt, billionaire, blown-cover, butler, car-accident, car-crash, cat, character-name-in-title
Genres: Comedy,
Taglines: Don't let the fancy clothes fool you. Small town kid, big time right hook

Quotes:

Crazy Eyes: I watch the stock market channel all the time - I just watch because I suspect that anchor man of being an evil leprechaun... he can bullshit everybody else, but he ain't fooling me.

Helicopter Pilot: You own the Jets, Deeds.

Emilio: How can I thank you?::Longfellow Deeds: All I want is your friendship, Emilio. You're a good man.::Emilio: Deeds! How about a billion dollars?::Longfellow Deeds: Alright.::Emilio: Done.

Longfellow Deeds: Whoa, you kinda snuck up on me there...::Emilio: I am very very sneaky, sir.

[Longfellow Deeds is showing Emilio his frostbitten foot]::Emilio: The hideousness of that foot will haunt my dreams forever.::Longfellow Deeds: Oh, yeah. I've heard that before

Babe: You must be Jan. My name is...::Jan: I know who you are. Wham-Bam Dawson, a.k.a. Little Miss Slut-slut.::Babe: Okay, I deserved that...::Jan: Do you have any idea how much you hurt him? You're not getting anywhere near that boy.::Babe: I have to find him, and there's nothing you can do to stop me.::Jan: [rolls up her sleeves] There's a lot I can do to stop you.::Babe: He needs to know how bad I feel, and I would go to the end of the earth, I would do anything, *anything*, to take back what I did to him.::Jan: ...I'm sorry? All I heard was, "blah blah blah, I'm a dirty tramp."

[Deeds comes to rescue a girl fallen into a frozen pond, but stops when he sees it's Babe]::Longfellow Deeds: Where do you got the camera hidden? In the woods?::Babe: [shivering] No camera! I'm s-s-so cold! Please!::Longfellow Deeds: You're gonna get mugged in there, too?::Babe: I'm s-s-s-so s-s-s-sorry! I really l-l-love you!::Longfellow Deeds: Bu-bu-bu-bu-bullshit!

Longfellow Deeds: It's hard to soar with the eagles when you're surrounded by turkeys.

Longfellow Deeds: What up, Chuck?

[Anderson raises his hand after Chuck Cedar asks if anyone knows a doctor that just faxed them]::Chuck Cedar: Congratulations, you have a spastic colon.::Cecil Anderson: That would explain a lot.