Virtua Fighter 5: Final Showdown -- 12 July 2014, Friend Matches #03

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• published: 31 Jan 2016
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My uploads have been getting later and later lately, and I'm not sure why... part of it is availability to muse on the notions of fighting in general and the contemplation of pugilistic navels, for lack of any sort of particular depth of knowledge on my own part when it comes to describing them. Yeah, sure! All I'm hearing are excuses! Tell 'em to: youtube.com/thisguy54321 Then get back to work! --- Match #1 -- Snow Mountain [Full & Open 16x16] Lau Chan (YuuGiJoou) vs. Akira Yuki (BluishNinjaJoo) In case it needed to be mentioned again, I am NOT the one to go to in case of any particularly pronounced desire to learn more about the characters, setting, and events of Virtua Fighter games. That said, I think I vaguely recall something like... er... Lau is the evil kung fu dad of another Virtua Fighter regular, Pai (you may remember her as one of Dural's unfortunate victims in the previous episode of amateur Virtua Fighter theater), hence both bearing the family name Chan. (Not that we couldn't already tell, the localization has all the character names in given and then surname order.) I'm not really sure what one has to do to be a bad guy in Virtua Fighter land besides trying to turn people into combat androids, though... Of somewhat more immediately relevant interest is the fact that this stage's specification of its boundaries is such that it actually varies between rounds! That is to say, sometimes it's open and sometimes a huge fence will appear from nowhere to make it an impromptu cage match! ...wait, what possible reason would there be to do that on a helipad? Sounds like a huge safety issue waiting to happen if you ask me. --- Match #2 -- Shrine [Low Fence 16x16] Dural (YuuGiJoou) vs. Sarah Bryant (BluishNinjaJoo) Oh no! It's that monster! This is a totally lopsided match and I dread having to see it enacted brutally upon that poor girl! ...I speak, of course, of Sarah Bryant! Seriously! Those Bryant kids are just nuts with their damage output! Especially the backflip kick! And all kinds of insane kick combos! See, even I know to fear their power! ...oh, what? I've got Dural?! Poor thing! Won't even get to stretch her legs properly! Everyone knows that boss-based brutality doesn't work FOR me, it's all down to the fact that I suck at Virtua Fighter! It would likewise be completely disingenuous to suggest I lost earlier because my opponent was using Dural... it's because my characters were unfortunate enough to have me in control! On the other hand, I somehow seemed to have stumbled upon... a very weird move of Dural's. A bizarre crotch thrust with an even stranger sound effect, and the strangest thing of all... a complete body color change?! The crotch thrust itself seems to deal damage at extreme close quarters, and after shedding the chrome finish for a somewhat more sinister look, her attacks get far heftier and seem to deal more damage in exchange for slower speed. My guess is that this is a way of having her employ the fighting data copied from the heavier hitters on the roster, like Wolf and Jeffry. Given the choice, I'd much prefer that than longer and faster combo strings that I'll never figure out just pecking away like I do. But, um, Dural... we were watching the cherry blossoms, and your new finish is totally darkening our day and wrecking the view! --- Match #3 -- River [Open 16x16] Brad Burns (YuuGiJoou) vs. Shun Di (BluishNinjaJoo) I just want to say... Shun is great. And his drunken boxing antics make him even greater! ... ... ...that's really all there is to it. How could someone with as plain a name and even plainer fighting style as Brad Burns even hope to compete? The closest thing to a compelling tactic is that he clearly starts resorting to some dirty boxing to try to turn the tides. Boo! Boooooo~! Throw this chump out of the ring! --- Match #4 -- City [Full Fence 10x10 Goh Hinogami (YuuGiJoou) vs. Jeffry Mcwild (BluishNinjaJoo) Goh is... a zombie? A creepy mobster type? A creepy mobster zombie?! ... ... ...again, I'm not the one to ask about anybody involved in this stuff. One thing I can say is that Goh's fighting style seems unusually stiff and slow, characterized by some incredibly minimalist movements... and yet, the damage output and force behind some of these attacks are simply outrageous. On the other hand, maybe it's just because our only point of direct comparison at the moment is the absolutely hulking Jeffry Mcwild... the guy even makes Dural of all people look small, if only just by a little bit. --- Match #5 -- Terrace [Half Fence 12x12] Lion Rafale (YuuGiJoou) vs. Pai Chan (BluishNinjaJoo) Now, I realize I called out Lion's speed and offensive prowess on our previous encounter... but... that's all well and good, but it assumes at least a certain baseline level of initiative on the attacker's part. Which is to say nicely that this clearly isn't my strong suit in ANY of these fighting games we've been touring, but perhaps especially this one.