Jack Wayne Sikma (born November 14, 1955, in Kankakee, Illinois) is a retired American NBA basketball center who is currently an assistant coach with the Minnesota Timberwolves. He was known for his distinctive curly, blonde hair in his playing days.
Sikma played at Illinois Wesleyan University, where he became a member of the Sigma Chi Fraternity. He was drafted eighth overall in 1977 by the Seattle SuperSonics, Sikma was named to the NBA All-Rookie Team. Among his notable career achievements are his seven All-Star Game selections (from 1979 to 1985) and his championship ring won with the 1978–1979 Sonics, where Sikma teamed with talented players such as Dennis Johnson, Gus Williams and an aging Paul Silas. Sikma always averaged double figures in points-per-game throughout his career, and after his stint with the Sonics, he maintained consistent numbers while playing with the Milwaukee Bucks in his final five seasons. For his career, Sikma scored 17,287 points and grabbed 10,816 rebounds.
Michael Jeffrey Jordan (born February 17, 1963) is a retired American professional basketball player, active entrepreneur, and majority owner of the Charlotte Bobcats. His biography on the National Basketball Association (NBA) website states, "By acclamation, Michael Jordan is the greatest basketball player of all time." Jordan was one of the most effectively marketed athletes of his generation and was considered instrumental in popularizing the NBA around the world in the 1980s and 1990s.
After a three-season career at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, where he was a member of the Tar Heels' national championship team in 1982, Jordan joined the NBA's Chicago Bulls in 1984. He quickly emerged as a league star, entertaining crowds with his prolific scoring. His leaping ability, illustrated by performing slam dunks from the free throw line in slam dunk contests, earned him the nicknames "Air Jordan" and "His Airness". He also gained a reputation for being one of the best defensive players in basketball. In 1991, he won his first NBA championship with the Bulls, and followed that achievement with titles in 1992 and 1993, securing a "three-peat". Although Jordan abruptly retired from basketball at the beginning of the 1993–94 NBA season to pursue a career in baseball, he rejoined the Bulls in 1995 and led them to three additional championships (1996, 1997, and 1998) as well as an NBA-record 72 regular-season wins in the 1995–96 NBA season. Jordan retired for a second time in 1999, but returned for two more NBA seasons from 2001 to 2003 as a member of the Washington Wizards.
You really like gorillas?
We've got just the pet for you
It's the way you're forced to act
To survive our schools
Make your whole life revolve around sports
Walk tough-don't act too smart
Be a mean machine
Then we'll let you get ahead
Jock-O-Rama-Save my soul
We're under the thumb of the Beef Patrol
The future of America is in their hands
Watch it roll over Niagara Falls
Pep rally in the holy temple
And you're forced to go
Masturbate en masse
With the favored religious cult
Cheerleaders yell-"Ra Ra Team"
From the locker room parades the prime beef
When archaeologists dig this up
They'll either laugh or cry
Jock-O-Rama-On the brain
Redneck-a-thon drivin' me insane
The future of America is in their hands
Watch it roll over Niagara Falls
Unzip that old time religion
On the almighty football field
Beerbellies of all ages
Come to watch the gladiators bleed
"Now boys, this game ain't played for fun
You're going out there to win
How d'ya win?
Get out there
And snap the other guy's knee!"
Beat 'em up! Beat 'em up!
Ra Ra Ra
Snap those spinal cords
Ha Ha Ha
The star quarterback lies injured
Unconscious on the football field
Looks like his neck's been broken
Seems to happen somewhere every year
His mom and dad clutch themselves and cry
Their favorite son will never walk again
Coach says, "That boy gave a hundred percent
What spirit
What a man"
But who cares?
Games over-Let's go get wasted man
To the 7-11, to the liquor store
Let's party all night and party some more
Another Trans-Am
Wrapped itself around a telephone pole
"I ain't drunk, officer
I just fell gettin' out of my car"
Don't worry about it, son
We were that way when we were young
You've got all the skills
To make a damn good businessman
Jock-O-Rama-that's the law
Come lick the butts of the Beef Patrol
If the future of America is handed to them