Bollocks (2012)

Actors: Rodney Victor Williams (producer), Morrison Thomas (actor), Anna Ray (actress), Simon J. Riley (producer), Simon J. Riley (director), Simon J. Riley (writer), Terry Devine-King (composer), Brandon Francis (actor), Brandon Francis (writer), Brandon Francis (writer), Brandon Francis (producer), Vivien Bridson (actress), John Pegg (editor), Daniel Hammersley (miscellaneous crew), Eddy Brimson (actor),

Plot: Bob is a loser and seems to attract bad luck wherever he goes. Working as an accounts administrator for a vending company he hates his job, but he neither has the motivation or aptitude to better his life. However, after his boss sends him on a coffee run, today might just be the catalyst for change.

Genres: Comedy, Short,
Taglines: Misfits and coffee

Die with Me (2011)

Actors: Afton Jillian (actress), Claudia Solti (writer), Jessica Renee Russell (actress), Drew Murray (producer), Drew Murray (writer), Drew Murray (actor), Heather Leigh (actress), Drew Murray (writer), Drew Murray (director), Christine Holt (actress), Kaydence Frank (actress), Patrick Cannell (composer), Debra Tammer (writer), Noah Meisner (editor), Noah Meisner (producer),

Genres: Comedy, Drama, Short,

Smooth (2009)

Actors: Rob Alec (actor), Sweeney Young (actor), Spike McKenzie (editor), Spike McKenzie (producer), Spike McKenzie (writer), Spike McKenzie (director), Tara James (actress), Gabriella Mazzarino (actress), Sylvia Shore (actor),

Genres: Comedy, Short,

Because I Said So (2007)

Actors: Jonathan Shore (producer), Cassandra Barbour (miscellaneous crew), Paul Brooks (producer), Mandy Moore (actress), Shay Cunliffe (costume designer), David Kitay (composer), Stephen Collins (actor), Michael Q. Schmidt (actor), Lauren Graham (actress), Mary Pat Gleason (actress), Diane Keaton (actress), Tony Hale (actor), Curt Clendenin (actor), Jean Hodges (miscellaneous crew), Marc C. Geschwind (miscellaneous crew),

Plot: Daphne Wilder is a mother whose love knows no bounds or boundaries. She is the proud mom of three daughters: stable psychologist Maggie, sexy and irreverent Mae and insecure, adorable Milly - who, when it comes to men, is like psychotic flypaper. In order to prevent her youngest from making the same mistakes she did, Daphne decides to set Milly up with the perfect man. Little does Milly know, however, that her mom placed an ad in the on-line personals to find him. Comic mayhem unfolds as Daphne continues to do the wrong thing for the right reasons...all in the name of love. In a battle of strong wills, the mother-daughter dynamic is tested in all its fierce, wacky complexity. The girls help Daphne finally discover the truths and impossibilities of motherly love, all while trying to answer the questions: where does it begin and where should it end?

Keywords: architect, balloon, beach, birthday-party, breakup, cake, caterer, cell-phone, cheating-on-boyfriend, chick-flick
Genres: Comedy, Romance,
Taglines: She's just your normal, overprotective, overbearing, over-the-top mother.

Quotes:

[from trailer]::Sung Mi: [to her friend, in Korean] Oy vey. Mom's ass is so tight, it's vacuum sealed.

[from trailer]::[interviewing men for Milly]::Daphne Wilder: I say marriage, you say...::Transvestite: Vera Wang.

[from trailer]::Mae: Mom, why do you always wear the high tops?::Daphne Wilder: I just got these, what's wrong with these?::Maggie: There just kinda depressing.::Milly: Mom for your 60th birthday we'll buy you something beautiful, something that grandma Moses would not wear.

Mae: You're not a helicopter, mom. Quit hovering.

Maggie: [discussing sex] I swear, by the third time I was so loud car alarms were going off and dogs were barking.::Daphne Wilder: What? Three times? Is that... is that normal?::Mae: Oh, come on, we all know I hold the record in this family.::[holds up seven fingers, Milly Smirks]::Daphne Wilder: Milly, honey, why are you so quiet?::Mae: [Coyly] 'Cause she's doing the oompa-loompa with two guys, mom.

Daphne Wilder: Well, who would you choose for my daughter?::Johnny: Me.::Daphne Wilder: What? No way!::Johnny: Why not?::Daphne Wilder: Oh, please. I am not setting my daughter up with an attractive, charming musician who will just break her heart.::Johnny: Wow. I love being reduced to a cultural cliche.

[from trailer]::Daphne Wilder: What are you gonna do with your hair? Maybe you oughta button these buttons, you look like you're asking for it.::Milly: I am asking for it!

[from trailer]::Daphne Wilder: God couldn't be everywhere so that is why he invented mothers.::Maggie: What? That was on a Hallmark card we gave you

Milly: I think he has a hot-dog with a bun!

Milly: [on the phone with her mother and sisters talking about the guy she's with] Only... I think he might have a hot-dog with a bun.::Daphne Wilder: [not getting it] Are you having a picnic?

300 (2006)

Actors: Lena Headey (actress), Mark Canton (producer), Dominic West (actor), Rodrigo Santoro (actor), Andrew Tiernan (actor), David Wenham (actor), Stephen McHattie (actor), Tom Rack (actor), Michael Fassbender (actor), Tyrone Benskin (actor), Gerard Butler (actor), James Bradford (actor), Arthur Holden (actor), Frank Miller (writer), Frank Miller (producer),

Plot: In the Battle of Thermopylae of 480 BC an alliance of Greek city-states fought the invading Persian army in the mountain pass of Thermopylae. Vastly outnumbered, the Greeks held back the enemy in one of the most famous last stands of history. Persian King Xerxes lead a Army of well over 100,000 (Persian king Xerxes before war has about 170,000 army) men to Greece and was confronted by 300 Spartans, and several hundred Arcadians. Xerxes waited for 10 days for King Leonidas to surrender or withdraw left with no options he moved. The battle lasted for about 3 days and after which all 300 Spartans were killed. The Spartan defeat was not the one expected, as a local shepherd, named Ephialtes, defected to the Persians and informed Xerxes of a separate path through Thermopylae, which the Persians could use to outflank the Greeks.

Keywords: 5th-century-b.c., abdominals, adultery, ambassador, anal-sex, ancient-greece, ancient-world, animal-attack, antiquity, arab-stereotype
Genres: Action, Fantasy, History, War,
Taglines: Feel the wrath in IMAX Spartans, tonight, we dine in hell! Based on Frank Miller's Graphic Novel Thirsty for Spartan blood! Pledged to crush! This is where we fight, this is where they die!! What does it mean to turn one of the great graphic novels of our time into a major motion picture? Spartans, prepare for glory!

Quotes:

Stelios: We are with you, sire! For Sparta, for freedom, to the death!

Persian: My arm!::Stelios: It's not yours, anymore.

Queen Gorgo: Freedom isn't free at all, that it comes with the highest of costs. The cost of blood.

Xerxes: There will be no glory in your sacrifice. I will erase even the memory of Sparta from the histories! Every piece of Greek parchment shall be burned. Every Greek historian, and every scribe shall have their eyes pulled out, and their tongues cut from their mouths. Why, uttering the very name of Sparta, or Leonidas, will be punishable by death! The world will never know you existed at all!::King Leonidas: The world will know that free men stood against a tyrant, that few stood against many, and before this battle was over, even a god-king can bleed.

King Leonidas: Persian cowards.

Queen Gorgo: Do not be coy or stupid, Persian. You can afford neither in Sparta!::Messenger: What makes this woman think she can speak among men?::Queen Gorgo: Because only Spartan women give birth to real men!

[as arrows rain down on the Spartans, Astinos begins laughing hysterically]::Stelios: What the hell are you laughing at?::Astinos: Well, you had to say it!::Stelios: What?::Astinos: "Fight in the shade"!::[both laugh]

Stelios: Our ancestors built this wall using ancient stones from the bosom of Greece herself. And with a little Spartan help, your Persian scouts supplied the mortar.

Dilios: Immortals... we put their name to the test.

[first lines]::Dilios: When the boy was born, like all Spartans, he was inspected.

300 (2006)

Actors: Lena Headey (actress), Mark Canton (producer), Dominic West (actor), Rodrigo Santoro (actor), Andrew Tiernan (actor), David Wenham (actor), Stephen McHattie (actor), Tom Rack (actor), Michael Fassbender (actor), Tyrone Benskin (actor), Gerard Butler (actor), James Bradford (actor), Arthur Holden (actor), Frank Miller (writer), Frank Miller (producer),

Plot: In the Battle of Thermopylae of 480 BC an alliance of Greek city-states fought the invading Persian army in the mountain pass of Thermopylae. Vastly outnumbered, the Greeks held back the enemy in one of the most famous last stands of history. Persian King Xerxes lead a Army of well over 100,000 (Persian king Xerxes before war has about 170,000 army) men to Greece and was confronted by 300 Spartans, and several hundred Arcadians. Xerxes waited for 10 days for King Leonidas to surrender or withdraw left with no options he moved. The battle lasted for about 3 days and after which all 300 Spartans were killed. The Spartan defeat was not the one expected, as a local shepherd, named Ephialtes, defected to the Persians and informed Xerxes of a separate path through Thermopylae, which the Persians could use to outflank the Greeks.

Keywords: 5th-century-b.c., abdominals, adultery, ambassador, anal-sex, ancient-greece, ancient-world, animal-attack, antiquity, arab-stereotype
Genres: Action, Fantasy, History, War,
Taglines: Feel the wrath in IMAX Spartans, tonight, we dine in hell! Based on Frank Miller's Graphic Novel Thirsty for Spartan blood! Pledged to crush! This is where we fight, this is where they die!! What does it mean to turn one of the great graphic novels of our time into a major motion picture? Spartans, prepare for glory!

Quotes:

Stelios: We are with you, sire! For Sparta, for freedom, to the death!

Persian: My arm!::Stelios: It's not yours, anymore.

Queen Gorgo: Freedom isn't free at all, that it comes with the highest of costs. The cost of blood.

Xerxes: There will be no glory in your sacrifice. I will erase even the memory of Sparta from the histories! Every piece of Greek parchment shall be burned. Every Greek historian, and every scribe shall have their eyes pulled out, and their tongues cut from their mouths. Why, uttering the very name of Sparta, or Leonidas, will be punishable by death! The world will never know you existed at all!::King Leonidas: The world will know that free men stood against a tyrant, that few stood against many, and before this battle was over, even a god-king can bleed.

King Leonidas: Persian cowards.

Queen Gorgo: Do not be coy or stupid, Persian. You can afford neither in Sparta!::Messenger: What makes this woman think she can speak among men?::Queen Gorgo: Because only Spartan women give birth to real men!

[as arrows rain down on the Spartans, Astinos begins laughing hysterically]::Stelios: What the hell are you laughing at?::Astinos: Well, you had to say it!::Stelios: What?::Astinos: "Fight in the shade"!::[both laugh]

Stelios: Our ancestors built this wall using ancient stones from the bosom of Greece herself. And with a little Spartan help, your Persian scouts supplied the mortar.

Dilios: Immortals... we put their name to the test.

[first lines]::Dilios: When the boy was born, like all Spartans, he was inspected.

Amore tossico (1983)

Actors: Detto Mariano (composer), Marco Ferreri (miscellaneous crew), Enzo Meniconi (editor), Lia Francesca Morandini (costume designer), Erminio Bianchi Fasani (actor), Fernando Arcangeli (actor), Claudio Caligari (writer), Claudio Caligari (director), Giorgio Nocella (producer), Gianni Schettino (actor), Patrizia Vicinelli (actress), Guido Blumir (writer), Cesare Ferretti (actor), Enzo Di Benedetto (actor), Mario Caiazzi (actor),

Genres: Crime, Drama,

Desire (1982)

Actors: Tamara Longley (actress), Kay Parker (actress), Scott Irish (actor), Ron Jeremy (actor), William Margold (actor), Mark Weiss (writer), Becky Savage (actress), Herschel Savage (actor), Randy West (actor), Bunny Bleu (actress), Misty Dawn (actress), Mai Lin (actress), Vinnie Rossi (director), Jerry Davis (actor), Mark Harris (actor),

Plot: Old Tobias hires the psychologist Doctor Varlay to interview people about their desires. While flashbacks are shown of Young Tobias and Lilly, Doctor Varlay meets her interviewees. Laura reminisces about a joint meeting with her two boyfriends. Stand-up comedian John recalls dreaming of talking and touching a mannequin girl so much that she momentarily came to life. Next up, retired football player Fred recalls a random sex encounter, prompting the buxom doctor to fantasize of pleasuring him. Lastly, Kim fantasizes about her female roommate, prompting Doctor Varlay to imagine the same scenario with her assistant Carol. Kim also recalls a _The Crying Game (1992)_ (qv) experience with a transsexual. Doctor Varlay then finds her real desire in Old Tobias' assistant, Carlos. Carol does the same with Fred. At Old Tobias' deathbed, a Lilly hallucination reveals she left him because he desired money over her.

Keywords: anal-sex, breast-fondling, breast-suckling, buxom, cunnilingus, deathbed, ejaculation, fellatio, fingering, flashback
Genres: Adult,

Napoli serenata calibro 9 (1978)

Actors: Giuseppe Marrocco (actor), Ciro Ippolito (writer), Nino Vingelli (actor), Clara Bindi (actress), Ciro Ippolito (producer), Alfonso Brescia (writer), Piero Regnoli (writer), Luciano Zanussi (actor), Lina Franchi (actress), Alfonso Brescia (director), Alex Partexano (actor), Lucio Montanaro (actor), Carlo Broglio (editor), Ria De Simone (actress), Mario Merola (actor),

Genres: Crime, Drama,

Soft Places (1978)

Actors: Annette Haven (actress), Paul Thomas (actor), Chris Cassidy (actress), John Seeman (actor), Daniel Cady (writer), Daniel Cady (producer), Carl Regal (actor), Christine Kelly (actress), Rock Steadie (actor), China Leigh (actress), Elaine Wells (actress), John Rolling (actor), Joanna Williams (editor), Miki Star (actress), Joanna Williams (director),

Plot: Returning from the funeral of her very wealthy and prominent husband, the widow, accompanied by her family attorney, discusses the unusual will her husband has left. In order to inherit the full benefits of this "spoken will" it is required that the widow experience every known sexual activity. Through these outrageous activities, possibly her frigidity will fade, and a truly loving woman will be unleashed. The experiment works! In one sexually explicit act after another, the widow wins the inheritance and her complete sexual freedom!

Keywords: abusive-husband, ash-scattering, ashes, bar, bar-brawl, bar-fight, cheap-bar, dildo, estate, female-masturbation
Genres: Adult,
Taglines: They're not hard to find... the best places are the Soft Places