August 29

if every day is a gift i’d like to give this one back
the longest drive of my life julie in the passenger
seat and barely a word said between us we were on our
way to visit when the phone rang still over two hours
away two hours that felt like so much more in virtual
silence in times like this it’s a bit unnerving how
often thoughts like, ‘maybe they made a mistake and
they’ll sort it out right away and call back to let me
know all is well’, pass through your head you keep
checking your phone for that missed call, but nothing
we couldn’t get there fast enough, yet there was a part
of me that thought that if i didn’t show up at all then
it couldn’t become real won’t you please let me give
this one back, give this day back cuz i don’t know if i
can make good use of this gift you’ve give me i walked
in the door to sympathetic looks from family and
friends but it was the faces if my mother, brother, and
sister that came into focus immediately what was there
to say? are there any words that would do this
situation justice? ‘at least it was quick and painless’
‘it most likely happened in his sleep so he never knew
it hit him’ ‘he no longer has to deal with this
terrible disease’ none better than silence i just
commemorated my first Father’s Day without mine we have
no traditions of remembrance on that day for those of
ours who have passed my father loved his music and he
will live on in mine won’t you please let me give this
one back, give this day back cuz i don’t know if i can
make good use of this gift you’ve give me just take it
back, please take it back, i don’t want this, please
take it back if i have one responsibility now it’s to
take the lessons i’ve learned and pass them on to those
who will listen in honor of his legacy always fight for
what you believe is right no matter how many are
telling you you’re wrong always honor the work of those
that came before you and always cherish the family and
the friendships that share your laughter in the good