Zombie Strippers! (2008)
Actors:
Marilyn Penn (miscellaneous crew),
Tito Ortiz (actor),
Robert Englund (actor),
Jenna Jameson (actress),
Robert Oppel (actor),
Clayton Landey (actor),
Jennie Floyd (actress),
Jay Lee (writer),
Jay Lee (editor),
Jay Lee (director),
Jim Lampley (actor),
Marion Kerr (actress),
Rico Devereaux (actor),
Rico Devereaux (actor),
John T. Woods (actor),
Plot: In the not too distant future a secret government re-animation chemo-virus gets released into conservative Sartre, Nebraska and lands in an underground strip club. As the virus begins to spread, turning the strippers into "Super Zombie Strippers" the girls struggle with whether or not to conform to the new "fad" even if it means there's no turning back.
Keywords: arm-ripped-off, back-from-the-dead, bare-breasts, basement, bite, bitten-hand, bitten-in-the-neck, bitten-in-the-throat, bitten-on-the-arm, blonde
Genres:
Comedy,
Horror,
Taglines: Live Dead Nudes They'll dance for a fee, but devour you for free. They'll Swallow Your Soul, Anything Else Will Cost You.
Quotes:
Paco: Badgers? Badgers? We don't need no stinking badgers!
Lillith: [after stripping for the first time as a zombie] Death is good.
Jimmy: Your hands are so cold. Whoa! That's interesting. Your tongue is so dry.::Kat: Then get it wet!
Dr. Chushfeld: Major! Thank god you guys are here. It's bad in there.::Maj. Camus: It better be. Right, Lieutenant?::Lt. Ryker: We're the best of the best, sir! We drink napalm and and piss fire!::Maj. Camus: Semper-fi!::Lt. Ryker: Hoo-rah!::Maj. Camus: So what seems to be the problem, doc?::Dr. Chushfeld: Believe it or not - zombies!
Maj. Camus: Nothing like a good challenge.::Lt. Ryker: We improvise and adapt, sir!::Maj. Camus: We just stopped that thing, what was it called again, Lieutenant?::Lt. Ryker: Armageddon, sir!::Maj. Camus: That's the one. Lieutenant Ryker here killed Satan himself with a sharp stick. Good work soldier!
Lt. Ryker: Today's a good day to die!
Dr. Genet: The virus is based on the human X chromosome, so it stays more pure from woman to woman. But once you get a man in there, like everything else, it all goes to shit.
Maj. Camus: So what do we have to do to take one of these zombies down, doc?::Dr. Chushfeld: Well, what works for us is we've been surgically removing the medulla oblongata.::[Camus cocks shotgun and blows a zombie's head off]::Dr. Chushfeld: Or that.
Cole: [to strip club patrons] Nothing comes out of your pants except tips for the girls.
Madame Blavatski: [introducing Jessy to strippers] Okay uber-sluts, we have new meat!
Valdez Is Coming (1971)
Actors:
Barton Heyman (actor),
Phil Brown (actor),
John Franco (miscellaneous crew),
Elmore Leonard (writer),
Burt Lancaster (actor),
Charles Gross (composer),
José Morales (actor),
Hector Elizondo (actor),
Burt Lancaster (producer),
Susan Clark (actress),
Richard Jordan (actor),
Tony Epper (actor),
Rudy Ugland (miscellaneous crew),
Rudy Ugland (actor),
Roland Kibbee (writer),
Plot: The town constable, Bob Valdez, is forced to kill someone accused by Frank Tanner of being a murderer. Valdez asks Tanner for monetary help for the man's wife, but he is ridiculed and almost killed by Tanner's henchmen. Valdez recovers and summons up his days in the U.S. Cavalry in order to fight them. Valdez wounds one of the henchmen and sends him back to Tanner with the message, "Valdez is coming."
Keywords: african-american, ambush, anti-hero, based-on-novel, brothel, brutality, buffalo-rifle, captive, captive-woman, character-name-in-title
Genres:
Western,
Taglines: They tore his body. They buried his pride. But they forgot his old uniform, his Sharps rifle, and his Buffalo gun. Find Tanner, El Segundo, and the 16 others. And tell them Valdez is coming. Honor is Always Worth Fighting For.
Quotes:
Frank Tanner: Any last words?::Bob Valdez: Hundred Dollars!
Bob Valdez: Tell him: Valdez is coming.
El Segundo: [about Gay] She never smiles. If she were my woman, I would make her smile.
Frank Tanner: I treat you all right, don't I?::Gay Erin: Sometimes you're human - sometimes.
Gay Erin: [referring to Tanner] Is he coming?::Bob Valdez: He's coming - but not alone. No, not alone.
Bob Valdez: You know something? I would have liked to get $100 for that Indian woman.
El Segundo: [after capturing Valdez] Like tobacco?::Bob Valdez: [quietly] No.::El Segundo: [after pausing and nervously clearing his throat] Tell me something... Who are you?::Bob Valdez: I told you once before - Bob Valdez.::El Segundo: [referring to Valdez's earlier marksmanship against his men] You know something, Bob Valdez, you hit one, I think, 700-800 yards.::Bob Valdez: [with certitude] Closer to a thousand.::El Segundo: What was it? Sharps?::Bob Valdez: [nods] My own load.::El Segundo: You ever hunt buffalo?::Bob Valdez: Apache.::El Segundo: I knew it. When?::Bob Valdez: Before I know better.
[last lines]::Frank Tanner: I shoulda killed you three days ago.::El Segundo: Or gone to Nogales.::Bob Valdez: Or paid the hundred dollars.