Rachel Bloom, the talented creator and star of the CW musical comedy-drama Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, performed the original song “Heavy Boobs” a really amusing, but painfully accurate tribute that accurately portrays the burden that women with a large bust have to endure every single day.
I got them heavy boobs, heavy
Boobs, dense like dying stars.
I got them heavy boobs, heavy
Boobs, I can’t run real far.Let me break down what I just
Said. Each of my double D’s has the volume of a toddler’s
Head. Not bitchin’ bout my boobies
They look super fly in shirts (aah aah).But if I swung them in your face
You’d be like “omigod that hurts.”
I’m blind. Holy crap. I literally can’t
See. I have permanent retinal damage.