Summer Toonage

Shits real complicated lately. Here's some summer toonage to brighten your days:

Affimative Action? Or Reverse Discrimination?

As I toil in the hardest job I have ever had... which is ACTUALLY FINDING ONE, I have noticed a couple of things. The first is that as you email your resume to the gaping maw that is the unknown hiring director; you might as well not even bother. I have doubts that any of the hundreds of resumes even get looked at.

The most troubling one of all is that anytime you fill out an online application, there are two mandatory questions. One is to state your race/ethnic background. The second is to state your sex. True, you do have the option of checking the "i refuse to answer this question" box, but no doubt anyone foolish enough to select that choice is immediately eliminated from the employment competition.

I have no idea how recent these questions have become mandatory. It's (yeah right!) illegal to discriminate in hiring practices in the USA; but why ask the questions? Wouldn't total anonymity be a better guarantee? With answers to these questions, wouldn't companies be establishing quotas? Total reverse discrimination.

Leave it to Canada to get things right; again. Our neighbors to the north ban those types of questions.

I am going to start marking the "eskimo" box.

No Trouble In The Heartland

Feeling good lately. Feelin' 7-up.

Made an executive decision a couple of weeks back to go on a major bender. If this guy can do a never ending tour, than I can turn Pro and just stay wasted for as long as I can. Day 13 of my Charles Bukowski streak. I've gotten past the roadblock of the morning hangover as well... channeling the fogginess into a placid plateau and the interior hummmmmmming sound that encompasses me like a velvet blanket (or something). Work has settled into something akin to Buenos Aires after the Bugs blew it to bits with that giant Asteroid.

Feelin' great in fact. Saw this guy last nite. Yeah, it's all hokey show-biz shtick but the mofo does fucking rock it hard. What is he, 70 years old and he still brings it every freaking nite. Of course, at this point the Jersey girls have morphed into Jersey Grannies; passing Jersey soccer moms about 10 years ago on the road past MILF and possibly now at the GRILF stage.

But, it's all about the rawk... and sposedly, I've got a couple of shows coming up with various pursuits and it looks like we are heading into the studio to record a song for a horror movie.
That would be sweet. Sweeter than the show we are sposed to play at some Lawn Guyland college cover band bar... wait'll they get a load of us!

Plus, shows from dese guys, and dese guys (and gal) on the horizon... I loves me some punk rock.



Toonage:
The Damned - Blitzkrieg Bop (w/ Joey Ramone!) - Live 1988
Turbonegro - Hobbit Motherfuckers
Nashville Pussy - I'm The Man
Slayer - Richard Hung Himself

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Now playing: Jerry Lee Lewis - What's Made Milwakee Famous (Has Made a Loser Out of Me)
via FoxyTunes

Of Monsters, Giants, and a King

Saw Cloverfield over the weekend and it certainly rocked. It's done as a videotape that one of the characters shoots during an attack on NYC (where else!) by some sort of monster. As it is supposed to be an amateur video, it falls in and out of focus and the picture is shaky, but the concept really makes it seem that you are involved in the action. There is one scene that takes place in a helicopter that is really freaky.

I wish however, that everyone would stop beating up on NY. Between this and I Am Legend, the Big Apple has taken more than it's share of hit's lately. There is one scene that echoes 9-11 very eerily. Here's hoping the next movie takes out Boston. I'd like to see Fenway Park melt under the next alien death ray. Or something.

A happier event in NY is that the Giants are going to the freakin' Super Bowl! I was supposed to be at the game at the Frozen Tundra in Green Bay last nite, but things fell apart. And, upon reflection, that was a good thing. It looked unbearably cold and the cardiac arrests provided by Big Blue woulda killed me. Holy crap! Eli and Plaxico and the G-men defense put a hurtin' on Brett Favre and the Cheeseheads and now it's on to the Super Bowl! It would be nice to knock off the Patriots and destroy their season, especially after the Red Sawx have bitch-slapped the Yankees around the last few years.

And today is Martin Luther King day. As Bill and Ted said: "Be excellent To Each Other". Racism and other hate-isms sucks. Unless it's anti-Boston.

Toonage:

NOFX - Don't Call Me White

Rancid - Don't Call Me White

Minor Threat - Guilty Of Being White (demo)

Slayer - Guilty Of Being White

Stiff Little Fingers - White Noise

A Slayer Summer

Summer's here and the time is right for... SLAYER!
I spoze there alot of kids (or maybe even adults!) that take these guys seriously with all the devil stuff. I just think they rock. And their lyrics are funny.
Back "in the day", as we geriatrics say, it was fun to yell "Freebird" or "Starship Troopers" at a band when they were playing. In fact, one time we yelled it and The Dream Syndicate played it! Now, it's fun to yell "SLAYER" at the band, especially if it's some crunchy jam band or some downtown moron hipster thang.
But I digress. Here are some tunes (including some covers of Minor Threat and other cool songs) that will make your lawn die.

SLAYER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Toonage:

Slayer - Guilty Of Being White (Minor Threat cover)
Slayer - Filler/I Don't Want To Hear It (Minor Threat cover)
Slayer - Richard Hung Himself (DI cover)
Slayer - Violent Pacification - (D.R.I. cover)
Slayer - I'm Gonna Be Your God (sort of a Stooges cover)
Slayer - In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida (Iron Butterfly cover)
Slayer - South Of Heaven