Rik Mayall as Alan B'stard. A extreme right-wing conservative who cares for no one but himself. He use his position as the most popular politician to make his life a bit more easier on the expense of everyone else in England. Who Shot Alan B'Stard? (January 14, 1990) -- All of Britain is in shock at the attempted assassination of Alan, which has left him comatose and fighting for his life in the hospital. The attack has come at a crucial time in the debate over capital punishment: a vote on its restoration in the House of Commons is imminent and, while bookmakers had previously placed the odds of its passage at 100-to-1 against, it is now even money as to whether it will pass. On the day of the vote, the result is a perfect tie, 305 to 305, and it looks like the bill will fail. But at the last second, none other than Alan himself strides into the room and casts the crucial vote in favour. In interviews after the vote, Alan claims that his seemingly miraculous recovery is the work of an Amazonian shaman, Chief Amlumi, and begins making the rounds of the talk shows touting his newest charity, Central Amazon Spiritual Healers (He asks for cheques to be "made out to CASH, for short"). He also persuades Parliament to bring back hanging and public executions and gives Sir Greville, who has been promoted to the newly-created post of Minister for Law and Order, a kickback to gain the contract to construct the new gallows to be used throughout Britain. Sarah, of course, suspects that Alan has faked the whole thing to make money, and she's right: Alan soon descends on a local bookie to collect on the £10,000 bet he made that capital punishment would be reinstated, placed back when the odds were still 100-to-1 against. Seeking to expose Alan's fraud and ruin his career, Sarah allies herself with Kerry Grout, a talk show host who exposes Alan's charity fraud during an interview, leading Alan to rashly threaten his life on live TV. That night, Piers, who has joined Sarah after learning that Alan has conned him out a £50,000 donation to the fake charity, sneaks into the office he shares with Alan and discovers the truth: that Alan paid a Basque nationalist mercenary to shoot at him with Piers' high-powered rifle while he was clad in a bulletproof vest. That night, Sarah calls Alan from a phone booth in the House of Commons lobby and lures him away from the office, while Piers and Kerry sneak in to film a piece demonstrating how Alan pulled off the hoax. During the demonstration, however, Piers accidentally shoots and kills Kerry with the rifle and then jumps out the window and into the Thames in panic. An oblivious Alan soon arrives back on the scene and, not noticing Kerry's dead body, picks up the rifle just as a policeman arrives and arrests him for the murder. At his trial, both the policeman and Sarah perjure themselves, with the policeman claiming that Alan confessed to him and Sarah denying that she ever called Alan to get him out of his office. Alan tries to assert an insanity defense, calling Chief Amlumi to testify that the jungle drugs he used to heal Alan can cause hallucinations and delusions, but the prosecutor exposes Amlumi and his interpreter as a vaudeville tomahawk-throwing act. Piers, who survived his fall by landing on a ship bound for Thailand, finally arrives and testifies that he is the real killer, but the prosecutor discredits his claims by asking the jury to question whether a barrister and Member of Parliament could really be that stupid. Alan is convicted and slated to become the first man executed on his own gallows. Alan's attempts to bribe his way out his sentence prove futile, and he is taken to the gallows to be hanged before a live TV audience. As the trapdoor opens, however, he is saved by his own greed: the subcontractor he used to build the gallows used balsa wood, rather than the promised mahogany, and the entire gallows collapses under Alan's weight. This event is taken as an act of God, and Alan receives a full pardon from the Crown. Rik Mayall as Alan B'Stard Michael Troughton as Piers Fletcher-Dervish Marsha Fitzalan as Sarah B'Stard

• published: 05 Nov 2012
• views: 34655