Straight to Hell Returns (2010)

Actors

• Elvis Costello (actor)
• Graham Fletcher-Cook (actor)
• Graham Fletcher-Cook (actor)
• Sy Richardson (actor)
• Dick Rude (actor)
• Joe Strummer (actor)
• Del Zamora (actor)
• Kathy Burke (actress)
• Courtney Love (actress)
• Michele Winstanley (actress)
• Cary Brokaw (producer)
• Eric Fellner (producer)
• Scott Millaney (producer)
• Paul Raphael (producer)
• Alex Cox (writer)

Genres

• Western

Saturday Night Dead (1984)

Actors

• Bob Billbrough (actor)
• Karen Scioli (actress)
• Steve Bronstein (producer)
• Steve Bronstein (writer)
• Karen Scioli (writer)

Genres

• Comedy
• Horror

Animal Crackers (1930)

Actors

• Robert Allen (actor)
• Robert Greig (actor)
• Donald MacBride (actor)
• The Marx Brothers (actor)
• Chico Marx (actor)
• Groucho Marx (actor)
• Harpo Marx (actor)
• Zeppo Marx (actor)
• Edward Metcalf (actor)
• The Music Masters (actor)
• Louis Sorin (actor)
• Hal Thompson (actor)
• Margaret Dumont (actress)
• Margaret Irving (actress)
• Kathryn Reece (actress)

Genres

• Comedy
• Musical

Taglines:

The maddest comics of them all!

Quotes:

Capt. Spaulding: How much would you charge to run into an open manhole?::Ravelli: Just the cover charge.::Capt. Spaulding: Well, drop in sometime.::Ravelli: Sewer.::Capt. Spaulding: Well, we cleaned that up pretty well.

Capt. Spaulding: I used to know a fellow who looked exactly like you by the name of Emanuel Ravelli. Are you his brother?::Ravelli: I am Emanuel Ravelli.::Capt. Spaulding: You're Emanuel Ravelli?::Ravelli: I am Emanuel Ravelli.::Capt. Spaulding: Well, no wonder you look like him. But I still insist there is a resemblance.::Ravelli: Heh, heh, he thinks I look alike.::Capt. Spaulding: Well, if you do, it's a tough break for both of you.

Capt. Spaulding: Now read me the letter, Jamison.::Horatio Jamison: [reading] "Honorable Charles H. Hungadunga..."::Capt. Spaulding: [correcting him] Hungerdunger. [they say the "hung" syllable in unison] Hoong.::Horatio Jamison: Hungerdunger.::Capt. Spaulding: That's it, Hungerdunger.::Horatio Jamison: [continues reading] "... care of Hungerdunger, Hungerdunger, Hungerdunger, and McCormick."::Capt. Spaulding: You've left out a Hungerdunger. You left out the main one, too. Thought you could slip one over on me, didn't you, eh? [pause] All right, leave it out and put in a windshield wiper instead.::[Jamison nods and writes]::Capt. Spaulding: I tell you what you do, Jamison, I tell you what. Make it, uh, make it three windshield wipers and one Hungerdunger. They won't all be there when the letter arrives anyhow.::Horatio Jamison: [rushes quickly through what he's just written] "... Hungerdunger, Hungerdunger, Hungerdunger... and McCormick."::Capt. Spaulding: And McCormick.::Horatio Jamison: [reading] "Gentlemen, question mark."::Capt. Spaulding: [correcting him] Gentlemen, question mark? Put it on the penultimate, not on the diphthongic. You wanna brush up on your Greek, Jamison. Well, get a Greek and brush up on him.::Horatio Jamison: [reading] "In re yours of the fifth inst..."::Capt. Spaulding: I see.::Horatio Jamison: Now, uh... you said a lot of things here that I didn't think were important, so I just omitted them.::Mrs. Rittenhouse: Well!::Capt. Spaulding: Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. [suddenly tries to hit Jamison with his switch, but misses; he falls]::Mrs. Rittenhouse: [helps Spaulding up] Oh, Captain! Good gracious! Oh, my.::Capt. Spaulding: [to Jamison] So, you just omitted them, eh? You just omitted the body of the letter, that's all. You've just left out the body of the letter, that's all. Yours is not to reason why, Jamison. You've left out the body of the letter. [pause] All right, send it that way and tell them the body will follow. [swings his switch indignantly]::Horatio Jamison: Do you want the body in brackets?::Capt. Spaulding: No, it'll never get there in brackets. Put it in a box. Put it in a box and mark it, uh..."fragilly."::Horatio Jamison: Mark it what?::Capt. Spaulding: Mark it fragilly. F-R-A-G... Look it up, Jamison, it's in the dictionary. Look under "fragile." Look under the table if you don't find it there.

Capt. Spaulding: Do you mind if I don't smoke?

[Spaulding has repeatedly told Jamison to take a letter to Spaulding's lawyers, but he has kept interrupting himself]::Capt. Spaulding: I say, take a letter to my lawyers!::Horatio Jamison: Well I am taking it!::[long pause, as nothing has yet been written]::Capt. Spaulding: Honorable Charles H., uh, Hungerdunger, care of Hungerdunger, Hungerdunger, Hungerdunger, Hungerdunger, and McCormick... semicolon.::Horatio Jamison: How do you spell semicolon?::Capt. Spaulding: All right, make it a comma. [pause] Honorable Charles. H. Hungerdunger, care of Hunger... [rushes through the repetition]... and McCormick. [pause] Gentlemen, question mark? [grunts]::Horatio Jamison: Do you want that, uh, [grunt] in the letter?::Capt. Spaulding: No, put that in an envelope. [pause] Now then. In re yours of the fifth inst., yours to hand and beg to rep... brackets... [pause]... We have gone over the ground carefully, and we seem to believe, i.e., to wit, e.g., in lieu, that, uh, despite all our... precautionary measures which have been involved... [pause]... uh, we seem to believe that it is hardly necessary for us to proceed unless we, uh, receive an ipso facto that is not negligible at this moment, quotes, unquotes, and quotes... [pause]... uh, hoping this finds you, I beg to remain...::Horatio Jamison: [interrupting] Hoping this finds him where?::Capt. Spaulding: Well, let him worry about that. Don't be so inquisitive, Jamison. [insultingly] Sneak. [pause] I say, hoping this finds you, I beg to remain, as of June 9th, cordially yours, regards. That's all, Jamison.

[Jamison finishes reading the letter that Spaulding dictated to him]::Horatio Jamison: [reading] "Quotes, unquotes, and quotes."::Capt. Spaulding: That's three quotes?::Horatio Jamison: Yes, sir.::Capt. Spaulding: Add another quote and make it a gallon. How much is it a gallon, Jamison?::Horatio Jamison: Regards.::Capt. Spaulding: Regards. That's a fine letter, Jamison, that's an epic. That's dandy. Now, I want you to make two carbon copies of that letter and throw the original away. And when you get through with that, throw the carbon copies away. Just send a stamp, airmail, that's all. You may go, Jamison. I may go too.

Capt. Spaulding: [to Mrs. Rittenhouse and Mrs. Whitehead] Let's get married.::Mrs. Whitehead: All of us?::Capt. Spaulding: All of us.::Mrs. Whitehead: Why, that's bigamy.::Capt. Spaulding: Yes, and it's big of me too.

Mrs. Rittenhouse: Captain, this leaves me speechless.::Capt. Spaulding: Well, see that you remain that way.

Capt. Spaulding: Africa is God's country, and he can have it.

Capt. Spaulding: Take the marriage problem. Take the foreign problem. Take Abyssinia. Say, you take Abyssinia and I'll take a hot fudge sundae on rye bread.