Couples, Culture and Sex: Who is Esther Perel?

• published: 11 Jun 2015
• views: 133

What do you hope to find in a relationship? Security or freedom? Adventure or Intimacy? Do you want the connections in your life to serve as aides on your personal journey or do you want to feel you belong to a larger endeavor? The future is often discussed in regard to technology, but when we look towards our personal futures we tend to think not of gizmos but of relationships. We think of the connections we want to build and experience, and the things that we wish to give the world in return. We think about how the world could be a better place for ourselves as well as those around us. The change we envision is not technological; rather it reflects what we value. In this film, therapist and author Esther Perel argues that the patterns in which we connect, and the conventions that guide how we couple present a window into what our culture really values. When Perel looks at the ways in which we connect in early the 21st century she sees contradictions. The rapid technological and social shifts of the previous centuries have created conflicts not only within our cultures but also in the hopes and desires of the individual. She finds us looking with one eye to the secure and charted path that the norms of the past seem to offer us. With the other eye we look to the opportunities and fluid freedoms that now seem open to us. Can we coherently (and satisfactorily) reconcile these desires? What connections do you value? For More About Esther Perel: www.estherperel.com/ Ted Talk: http://www.ted.com/talks/esther_perel_the_secret_to_desire_in_a_long_term_relationship?language=en Archival Images: Wikimedia Commons: Pompeii Couple: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Pompeii-couple.jpg Mariage du Duc de Bourgogne, Louis de France: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Lodewijk_XIV-Marriage.jpg Théodore Géricault, Three Lovers: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Th%C3%A9odore_G%C3%A9ricault_%28French_-_Three_Lovers_-_Google_Art_Project.jpg Szinyei Merse, Lovers: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Szinyei_Merse,_P%C3%A1l_-_Lovers_%281869%29.jpg Waller Hugh Paton, Lovers in a Cornfield: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Waller_Hugh_Paton_Lovers_in_a_cornfield.jpg William Powell Frith, The Lovers: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:The_Lovers,_1855,_by_William_Powell_Frith_-_Art_Institute_of_Chicago_-_DSC09571.JPG John Pettie, The Proposal: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Proposal_by_John_Pettie.jpg Edmund Blair Leighton, Off (Failed Proposal): http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Leighton,_Edmund_Blair_-_Off_-_1899.jpg Émile Friant, Le petite barque: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:La_petite_barque_E_Friant_Nancy_2718.jpg Young people near the Woodstock festival in August 1969. http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Woodstock-kids.jpg Émile Friant, Les_Amoureux: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Emile_Friant_Les_Amoureux.jpg William Powell Frith, The Marriage of the Royal Highnesses: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Simmons_%28after_Frith%29_Marriage_of_the_Prince_of_Wales.jpg Library of Congress: Unidentified soldier in Union first sergeant's uniform and unidentified woman in dress: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2010650332/ Wedding party inside arbor of flowers: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2012647945/ Situwuka & Katkwachsnea: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2001695405/ Young couple on rock holding hands: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/det1994024103/PP/ Bridal Couples: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/99401537/ Elderly African American couple: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/97510140/ Ishikawa, Toyonobu, Migi: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2008660751/ Chippewa wedding: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/93505033/ Before marriage (Couple under Umbrella): http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2005686733/ A resettled young couple: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/fsa1998019118/PP/ Rolf Armstrong, Safety First (Couple in Car): http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2011660519/ The Marriage, 1847: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2002710017/ Unidentified soldier in Union uniform with unidentified woman in dress: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2010650393/ Unidentified African American Family: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2002719399/ Unidentified couple, man seated and woman standing: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2004664584/ Members of the Monaghan Men's Irish Dancing Class and their partners: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2002697690/ Couple at Nevada Falls: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/89711582/ Yes (Young Marriage Proposal): http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/2012645741/ Soldiers Kissing, Union Station: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/owi2001013935/PP/ http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/owi2001013936/PP/ Couples Dancing: http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/fsa1998022989/PP/ http://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/fsa2000016676/PP/ Music in this film: The Ocean by Greyzi A Distant Voice (Instrumental) by Dean Wagg