Star Wars: Detours (2012)

Actors: Breckin Meyer (actor), Breckin Meyer (actor), Anthony Daniels (actor), Abraham Benrubi (actor), Joel McHale (actor), Ahmed Best (actor), Dee Bradley Baker (actor), Seth Green (actor), Seth Green (actor), Seth Green (actor), Donald Faison (actor), Tom Kane (actor), Zachary Levi (actor), Seth MacFarlane (actor), Breckin Meyer (actor),

Genres: Animation, Comedy,

Star Wars: ESPN Fantasy Football (2011)

Actors: Michael Bender (actor), Tedy Bruschi (actor), Mark Schlereth (actor), Mark Teitelman (director), Thomas Morley (actor), Victor Franco (actor), Erik Jensen (actor), Mike Healey (actor), Dean Amstutz (actor), Christine Ladnier (actress),

Genres: Sci-Fi,

Star Tours: The Adventures Continue (2011)

Actors: Scott Trimble (miscellaneous crew), Anthony Daniels (actor), Robin Atkin Downes (actor), James Earl Jones (actor), Tom Kane (actor), Frank Oz (actor), Paul Reubens (actor), Fred Tatasciore (actor), Patrick Warburton (actor), Carrie Fisher (actress), Allison Janney (actress), George Lucas (producer), Michael Giacchino (composer), Dee Bradley Baker (actor), Drew Massey (actor),

Plot: In the newly opened Star Tours touring agency, C-3PO is accidentally made to be the pilot of a StarSpeeder 1000. Also on board the craft is one of the guests, who is revealed to be a rebel spy who must be safely delivered from the Empire. With multiple beginnings, middles, and ends, there are 54 possible routes the StarSpeeder 1000 can take.

Keywords: colon-in-title, disney-park-attraction, disneyland, five-word-title, pit-droid, ride-film, space, space-travel, spacecraft, special-venue
Genres: Action, Sci-Fi, Short,

Quotes:

C-3PO: [rapidly approaching a repair dock on Naboo] Brakes! Brakes! Where are the brakes?

C-3PO: I have a bad feeling about this.

Computer Voice: Thruster malfunction.::C-3PO: Thrusters? Are they important?

C-3PO: A transmission?::Princess Leia: [in a hologram] I am Princess Leia of Alderaan. We've placed a rebel spy vital to the survival of the rebellion in your StarSpeeder. You must see him/her safely delivered to the coordinates I'm transmitting to your R2 unit. This is our most desperate hour. Help me, Star Tours, you're my only hope.::C-3PO: Her only hope. [R2 beeps] What do you mean we'll be making a slight detour?

C-3PO: [the Starspeeder 1000 crashes into the back of a Naboo fighter, its long tail smashing through the windshield; a Pit Droid grumbles] What do you mean we broke your ship? You broke our view port.::[the Pit Droid falls through the opening]::C-3PO: And I did not give you permission to come aboard.

C-3PO: May the Force be with you.

Darth Vader: I want that spy!

C-3PO: [to R2-D2] They're not going the wrong way, WE are, you nitwit!

C-3PO: Look, there's a platform. Let's land there.

C-3PO: [to R2-D2] What do you mean we're taking a slight detour?

Robot Chicken: Star Wars Episode III (2010)

Actors: Seth Green (actor), Seth Green (actor), Abraham Benrubi (actor), Donald Glover (actor), Bob Bergen (actor), Anthony Daniels (actor), Bob Bergen (actor), Abraham Benrubi (actor), Ahmed Best (actor), Zac Efron (actor), Donald Faison (actor), Ahmed Best (actor), Donald Glover (actor), Donald Glover (actor), Seth Green (actor),

Genres: Animation, Comedy, Sci-Fi,

Robot Chicken: Star Wars Episode II (2008)

Actors: Seth Green (actor), Seth Green (actor), Seth Green (actor), Ahmed Best (actor), Seth Green (actor), Seth Green (actor), Ahmed Best (actor), Abraham Benrubi (actor), Donald Faison (actor), Donald Faison (actor), Donald Faison (actor), Bob Bergen (actor), Abraham Benrubi (actor), Seth Green (actor), Seth Green (actor),

Genres: Animation, Comedy, Sci-Fi,

Quotes:

Darth Vader: Welcome my master! The Death Star construction is proceeding...::Emperor Palpatine: [interrupting Vader] Yeah! Great! Fine! Whatever. That flight was a fucking nightmare man. My stupid tray table broke and I ended up with a gallon of coffee in my crotch; it was like dunking my wang in hot lava. Something you have some experience with I guess, huh? Right?::Darth Vader: [shamefully] Yes...

Darth Vader: [pointing to a black suitcase with a white stripe that is passing by Vader and Palpatine on a luggage conveyor belt] Is that yours?::Emperor Palpatine: No! For the hundredth time, that's that same stupid black bag. Mine dosen't have a stripe. It's like that stripey bag is mocking me... Fuck you stripey bag.

Emperor Palpatine: Well, my suitcase is gone; sacrificed to the airport guards. Now I'm here for two fucking weeks with one fucking robe. Ohh! Now it's sticking to me like a wet Kleenex.

Emperor Palpatine: [as a surfboard is passing by him on the Death Star luggage conveyor belt] Wow, for real?

Han Solo: The empire is chasing us, they simply will not cease! Oh man my nuts are freezing Ken i'm about this bitch::Han Solo, Luke Skywalker: Peace!

Mon Mothma: [to Restaurant waiter] I'll have the calimari.::Admiral Ackbar: Well. I guess I'll have the insensitive bitch. With a side of fuck you!

Robot Chicken: Star Wars (2007)

Actors: Mark Hamill (actor), Ahmed Best (actor), Abraham Benrubi (actor), Seth Green (actor), Donald Faison (actor), Joey Fatone (actor), Ahmed Best (actor), Bob Bergen (actor), Donald Faison (actor), Seth Green (actor), Seth Green (actor), Seth Green (actor), Seth Green (actor), Seth Green (actor), Hulk Hogan (actor),

Genres: Animation, Comedy, Sci-Fi,
Taglines: Spend Father's Day with who really raised you... Star Wars. The chicken strikes back!

Quotes:

George Lucas: [being chased by costumed fans] I have a bad feeling about this.

Palpatine: [on the phone with Darth Vader] Vader! How's my favorite Sith?... Whoa whoa whoa... whoa, whoa. Just - slow down. Huh? What do you mean they blew up the Death Star? Fuck! Oh, fuck! Fuck! FUCK!... Who's "they"?... What the hell is an Aluminum Falcon?::[sighs]::Palpatine: OK, OK, so who's left?... Are you shitting me?... Well, where are you?... Wait a sec, you've been flying around for two weeks trying to get a signal?... Oh, you must smell like... feet wrapped in leathery, burnt bacon... Oh, oh, oh! Oh, I'm sorry, I thought my Dark Lord of the Sith could protect a small thermal exhaust port that's only two meters wide! That thing wasn't even fully paid off yet!... Do you - do you have ANY idea what this is going to do to my credit?::[phone beeps, he sighs]::Palpatine: Hang on, I've got another call.::[switches line]::Palpatine: WHAT? I'm very busy right now!... Oh! Oh, well - well, where are they going?... Oh, all right, uh... just get me a turkey club... Um, coleslaw, I guess. I'm not even gonna eat it... Well, what are you getting?... See, I always order the wrong thing. No, no, I'll just stick with that. OK, bye - what?... Oh, uh, Cherry Coke. Thanks.::[switches line]::Palpatine: Sorry about that.::[sighs]::Palpatine: What?... Oh, oh, "just rebuild it"? Oh, real fucking original. And who's going to give me a loan, jackhole, you?... You got an ATM on that torso Lite-Brite? Now get your seven-foot-two asthmatic ass back here, or I'm going to tell everyone what a whiny bitch you were about Padama-may or Panda Bear or whatever the hell her name is!...::[covers receiver]::Palpatine: Oh, jeez, he's crying!::[giggles, then into phone]::Palpatine: Hey, hey, hey, hey. C'mon. C'mon, don't do that. Just - just. Look, you know, I'm just dealing with a lot of crap right now. Death Star blown up by a bunch of fuckin' teenagers, you know? I didn't mean to snap.::[makes "jack-off" motion]::Palpatine: Oh, uh - just get back here. OK. OK. Bye. I... um... I...::Palpatine: [whispers into phone] I love you, too.

Darth Vader: Luke... I am your father!::Luke Skywalker: Noooo! That's impossible!::Darth Vader: It's true! And Princess Leia is your sister!::Luke Skywalker: That's... improbable.::Darth Vader: And the Empire will be defeated by Ewoks!::Luke Skywalker: That's... highly unlikely...::Darth Vader: And as a kid, I built C-3PO!::Luke Skywalker: ...wha? [time passes]::Darth Vader: And you know that all-powerful Force? That's really just microscopic bacteria called Midichlorians!::Luke Skywalker: [smoking a cigarette] Look, if you're not gonna take this seriously, I'm outta here!

Luke Skywalker: Your overconfidence is your weakness.::Palpatine: Your faith in your friends is yours.::Luke Skywalker: Not my faith in yo momma...::Palpatine: What was that?::Luke Skywalker: I said yo momma's so fat, Jabba the Hutt said DAAAAAMN!::Palpatine: Well, your mother is so ugly she put the 'ug' in 'ugnaught!'::Darth Vader: Ohh, yo momma fight!::[Cut to next scene. Luke and Palpatine are on stage in front of a crowd]::Luke Skywalker: Yo momma's so stupid, she spent all day saying 'am not' to R2!::Palpatine: Your mother is so fat, that Ben Kenobi said 'That's no moon, that's yo momma!'::Luke Skywalker: Yo momma's so stupid, she thought Jar Jar came with pickles pickles!::Palpatine: Your mother is so stupid she, she thinks, uh, that lightsabres come with fewer calories!::[Music cuts. Crowd fallls silent]::Palpatine: You know, cause it's 'lite,' and it's got less calories... and it's good for your body, ummm... anyway that's how stupid your mother is...::Luke Skywalker: Yo momma's so stupid she went to Bangkok to get a TIE fighter!::Crowd: Luke wins!::[Darth Vader throws Palpatine into the reactor core]

Zuckuss: How do you plan on putting down this rebellion everyone's talking about?::Palpatine Parody: By shooting it with lightning! That's how I solve all my problems! And then afterwards I shall eat pudding.

Princess Leia Organa: [lying in bed next to Luke] That was *so* wrong!

Classic Creatures: Return of the Jedi (1983)

Actors: Robert Guenette (writer), Robert Guenette (director), Billy Dee Williams (actor), Robert Guenette (producer), George Lucas (actor), Anthony Daniels (actor), Frank Oz (actor), Warwick Davis (actor), Dennis Muren (actor), Carrie Fisher (actress), Frank Oz (actor), Jim Henson (actor), Anthony Daniels (actor), Kenny Baker (actor), Kenny Baker (actor),

Genres: Documentary,

Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi (1983)

Actors: Mark Hamill (actor), Denis Lawson (actor), Anthony Daniels (actor), Warwick Davis (actor), Harrison Ford (actor), James Earl Jones (actor), Kenneth Colley (actor), Tony Cox (actor), Paul Brooke (actor), Jeremy Bulloch (actor), Ben Burtt (actor), Alec Guinness (actor), Ben Burtt (actor), Frank Oz (actor), Ralph Morse (actor),

Plot: Darth Vader and the Empire are building a new, indestructible Death Star. Meanwhile, Han Solo has been imprisoned, and Luke Skywalker has sent R2-D2 and C-3PO to try and free him. Princess Leia - disguised as a bounty hunter - and Chewbacca go along as well. The final battle takes place on the moon of Endor, with its natural inhabitants, the Ewoks, lending a hand to the Rebels. Will Darth Vader and the Dark Side overcome the Rebels and take over the universe?

Keywords: action-hero, alien, alien-civilization, allegory-of-multiple-historical-events., ambush, android, battle, battlefield, bestiality, blockbuster
Genres: Action, Adventure, Fantasy, Sci-Fi,
Taglines: Coming May 25, 1983 to your galaxy. [Second Advance poster] The Empire Falls.... Return To A Galaxy... Far, Far Away The Saga Continues.

Quotes:

Luke: [approaching R2-D2] I can't do it, R2. I can't go on alone.::Obi-Wan: [from out of sight] Yoda and I will always be with you.::Luke: Obi-Wan.::[Obi-Wan's spirit approaches Luke]::Luke: Ben! Why didn't you tell me? You told me that Darth Vader betrayed and murdered my father.::Obi-Wan: Your father... was seduced by the Dark Side of the Force. He ceased to be Anakin Skywalker and "became" Darth Vader. When that happened, the good man who was your father was destroyed. So what I told you was true... from a certain point of view.::Luke: A certain point of view?::Obi-Wan: Luke, you're going to find that many of the truths we cling to depend greatly on our own point of view. Anakin was a good friend. When I first met him, your father was already a great pilot. But I was amazed how strongly the Force was with him. I took it upon myself to train him as a Jedi. I thought that I could instruct him just as well as Yoda. I was wrong.::Luke: There is still good in him.::Obi-Wan: He's more machine now than man. His mind is twisted and evil.::Luke: I can't do it, Ben.::Obi-Wan: You cannot escape your destiny. You must face Darth Vader again.::Luke: I can't kill my own father.::Obi-Wan: Then the Emperor has already won. You were our only hope.::Luke: Yoda spoke of another.::Obi-Wan: The other he spoke of is your twin sister.::Luke: But I have no sister.::Obi-Wan: Hmm. To protect you both from the Emperor, you were hidden from your father when you were born. The Emperor knew, as I did, if Anakin were to have any offspring, they would be a threat to him. That is the reason why your sister remained safely anonymous.::Luke: Leia! Leia is my sister.::Obi-Wan: Your insight serves you well. Bury your feelings deep down, Luke. They do you credit, but they could be made to serve the Emperor.

Luke: I'll not leave you here. I've got to save you.::Anakin: You already have, Luke.

Darth Vader: You cannot hide forever, Luke.::Luke: I will not fight you.::Darth Vader: Give yourself to the Dark Side. It is the only way you can save your friends. Yes, your thoughts betray you. Your feelings for them are strong. Especially for... sister. So, you have a twin sister. Your feelings have now betrayed her, too. Obi-Wan was wise to hide her from me. Now his failure is complete. If you will not turn to the Dark Side... then perhaps she will...::Luke: [igniting light saber, screams] DARTH!

Darth Vader: Luke... help me take this mask off.::Luke: But you'll die.::Darth Vader: Nothing... can stop that now. Just for once... let me... look on you with my *own* eyes.::[Luke takes off Darth Vader's mask one piece at a time. Underneath, Luke sees the face of a pale, scarred, bald-headed, old man - his father, Anakin. Anakin sadly looks at Luke]::Anakin: Now... go, my son. Leave me.::Luke: No. You're coming with me. I'll not leave you here, I've got to save you.::Anakin: You already... have, Luke. You were right. You were right about me. Tell your sister... you were right.::[Anakin slumps down in death]::Luke: Father... I won't leave you.

Yoda: No more training do you require. Already know you, that which you need.::Luke: Then I am a Jedi.::Yoda: No. Not yet. One thing remains. Vader. You must confront Vader. Then, only then, a Jedi will you be. And confront him you will.

Moff Jerjerrod: Lord Vader, this is an unexpected pleasure. We are honored by your presence...::Darth Vader: You may dispense with the pleasantries, Commander. I'm here to put you back on schedule.::Moff Jerjerrod: I assure you, Lord Vader. My men are working as fast as they can.::Darth Vader: Perhaps I can find new ways to motivate them.

Moff Jerjerrod: The Emperor's coming here?::Darth Vader: That is correct, Commander. And, he is most displeased with your apparent lack of progress.::Moff Jerjerrod: We shall double our efforts.::Darth Vader: I hope so, Commander, for your sake. The Emperor is not as forgiving as I am.

Lando Calrissian: Split up and head back to the surface. And see if you can get a few of those TIE fighters to follow you.

Darth Vader: Obi-Wan has taught you well.

EV-9D9: Ah, new acquisitions! You are a protocol droid, are you not?::C-3PO: I am C-3PO, human/cyborg...::EV-9D9: [cuts him off] Yes or no will do.::C-3PO: Umm... yes.::EV-9D9: How many languages do you speak?::C-3PO: I am fluent in over six million forms of communication, and can readily...::EV-9D9: [cuts him off again] Splendid! We have been without an interpreter since our master got angry with our last protocol droid and disintegrated him.::C-3PO: Disintegrated?