"Yo, Iggy, you know how I was talking about getting a pet? Well, you won't believe what I picked out," Harrison said, smiling into his iPhone. "I don't know, a chihuahua," responded Andre Iguodala's voice. "No dude, an iguana! And guess what his name was at the store?" "Uh, Scaly McLizard?" "Iggy! Just like you, man!" Andre laughed. "That's cool. Iggy the iguana. Is he chill?" Harrison looked over to the tank which sat on his desk. Iggy was not an exciting animal, but he was cool with being picked up, and he ate whatever got put in his bowl. "Yeah, he's pretty chill. We get along great. But I'm worried. Right now he just kind of sits on his log all day unless I move him. I hope I'm taking care of him okay." "Him and me both," Andre replied. "I've been feeling real tired the past few days." "Well, you better snap out of it quick, because the Finals start soon." "I hear you. Anyway, I gotta get going. Tell Iggy to keep on chillin'." -- "Harrison and Iggy. Best bros forever," Harrison cooed, cradling his iguana in his arms. "You really liked that leftover taco meat, didn't you? Didn't yoooou?" Iggy looked at his owner with no trace of understanding or intelligence in his eyes. "Do you ever wish you could fly, Iggy?" Harrison asked his pet, holding him up to the ceiling. "Let's go flying! Whee!" Harrison began to run around his apartment. Iggy did not react well to being "flown" in this manner, and grabbed tightly onto Harrison's forearm with his toes. "Hey, Iggy, that tickles! Stop it!" Harrison squealed, giggling. "Let go! It tickles!" He began to shake his arms to get Iggy to release his grip. This technique worked, but not in the way that Harrison wanted; he watched in frozen horror as Iggy toppled helplessly to the ground. "Oh no! I'm so sorry! Are you okay Iggy?" Harrison exclaimed, horrified by his own irresponsibility. Iggy, meanwhile, righted himself and slowly trundled away from the action. However, Harrison immediately noticed that Iggy was walking with a pronounced limp. Gathering the injured iguana back up in his arms, Harrison placed Iggy back in his tank, where he blinked his eyes and didn't move. His leg was already red and swollen. Harrison hoped he would get better soon. -- Harrison shot around with his teammates before practice. His shot was falling, and he felt confident that he could take this focus to the Finals. However, all focus was lost when Andre Iguodala rolled himself into the gym in a wheelchair. "Andre! What happened, man?" Harrison asked, stunned. "Why's your leg in a cast?" As the rest of the Warriors gathered around their injured teammate, Andre explained. "I was just sitting at home last night, watchin' TV, when all of a sudden, I feel this sharp pain in my leg. I knew right then that my leg was broke, but I don't have any idea how it happened." As murmurs of "that's crazy" and "whoa" echoed through the group, Andre's story triggered a memory in Harrison's mind. "What's nuts is that last night I think my pet iguana broke his leg too," Harrison said. "I kinda dropped him and after that Iggy's leg was all funny looking." Andre and Harrison stared at each other, eyes wide, as they came to a kind of understanding. "IGGY IS A VOODOO IGUANA!" they shouted simultaneously. "What?" asked Shaun Livingston. "I hadn't been taking care of my iguana too good, and then Andre says on the phone that he doesn't feel good either. Then my iguana breaks his leg and Andre breaks his at the same time while just sitting on his ass. It makes perfect sense!" Harrison explained. "That pet shop dude must be some secret voodoo magician or something." "You know what we gotta do then," Andre said. Harrison's expression became downcast. "Yeah." -- "This is real tough. We had a bond, man. We were bros," Harrison said sadly, tearstains marring his face. Andre patted his teammate on the back. "I know. But, honestly, you proved that you suck at taking care of iguanas." "I didn't know Iggy was a voodoo iguana," Harrison wailed. "I just knew that he was the cutest animal in the whole pet store." "I'm ready to go when you are," said the third man in their group, a Mexican friend of Andre's named Pablo. "Iggy here will love it in the Mexican jungle. He'll be back to himself in no time." Iggy stared blankly out at the world from inside the glass confines of his tank as his fate was discussed. Just looking at him caused Harrison to burst into a fresh round of tears. "You be a good little iguana, alright? Always remember how much I loved you." Then, Pablo placed the tank in the front seat of his car and drove away. Harrison waved as the car disappeared into the distance, bound for Mexico. When the car was finally invisible, Harrison turned to his teammate. "Andre, do you think the pet store has any non-voodoo iguanas?" Andre grimaced. "I would try a different store." "I get you." There was a pause. "If they have one called Harry, do you think I should get it?" "No."

• published: 03 Jun 2015
• views: 19418