Heavy Weights (1995)
Actors:
Judd Apatow (actor),
David Bowe (actor),
Cody Burger (actor),
Lars Clark (actor),
Allen Covert (actor),
Bobby Fain (actor),
Paul Feig (actor),
Max Goldblatt (actor),
David Goldman (actor),
Dustin Greer (actor),
C. Michael Haynes (actor),
Tom Hodges (actor),
Tom Kelley (actor),
Matthew Bradley King (actor),
J.T. Alessi (actor),
Plot: 11-year-old Gerald "Gerry" Garner lives in Long Island, New York, and he's overweight. Gerry's parents Maury and Mrs. Garner decide to send Gerry to Camp Hope, a camp for overweight boys. The camp is owned by kindly Harvey Bushkin and his equally kind wife Alice Bushkin. When the Bushkins file for bankruptcy the camp has to be sold, it is bought by a wacko named Tony Perkis. Tony plans to force the campers to lose as much weight as they can, and he also intends to document the marathon shedding of weight and use it for an infomercial for his slenderizing program. In the eyes of the campers, Tony has made Camp Hope a living hell. As Gerry and counselor Pat Finley lead the efforts to overthrow Tony, the campers prepare for the Apache Relay against arch rival Camp MVP. The Apache Relay is a kind of race in which Camp Hope has never defeated Camp MVP before.
Keywords: actor-playing-multiple-roles, bankruptcy, black-humor, boy, boy-with-glasses, child's-point-of-view, cult-film, exercise, fat-camp, fat-joke
Genres:
Comedy,
Drama,
Family,
Sport,
Taglines: They never met a hot dog they didn't like... until now. They don't run the fastest. They don't jump the highest. But they sure are getting the last laugh.
Quotes:
Tony Perkis: Kiss the ground, joker-boy!::Josh: Hey, would you get your foot off my back?::Tony Perkis: Shut up!
Lars: Congratulations, Mr. Simms. You are the fattest boy in camp.
Roy: Josh. Somebody gonna die today.::Josh: Call 911.
Roy: Funny Josh. But really man, what happened? Talk to us.::Josh: [half-unaware] Josh was bad.::Roy: Oh man. Oh jeez.::Josh: [half-unaware] Josh now good.::Gerry: Good? Wha... what do you mean?::Josh: Must be... [finally showing his normal awareness] good to see my big ass again!
Gerry: Don't tell anyone, but I uh... snuck in some oreos. Just in case.::Josh: That was very sneaky of you, Gerry. Chipmunks! Download! Now!
Tony Perkis: Repulse the monkey... part the wild horse's mane.
Tony Perkis: First we're going to take an hour meditation break. Then we're going to climb that 1000-foot rock face over there with our bare hands and feet. I know you can do it, I have faith in you. But for now, observe the silence of the chi.
Gerry: [writing a letter] Dear Grandma... someone once said, "War is hell." They've never been to fat camp. I knew the food would be bad... [shows a revolting-looking lunch being passed out]... but even worse... [shows Lars stabbing the Blob with a spear]... today he killed the Blob.::Gerry: [goes to the go-kart track, closed and with people putting the karts in a pile] As for the go-karts, well... may they rest in pieces. I'm writing you because nobody else seemed to care.::Maury Garner: [on the phone] I did not send you to 'go-kart' camp!::Tony Perkis: [on the PA] Attention campers, lunch has been cancelled today, due to lack of hustle. Deal with it...::Gerry: Tony Perkis tries to lead by example...::Tony Perkis: [shows Tony on a bed of nails, and two guys placing an ice block on his stomach] This is the 18th level of the PerkiSystem. You'll all be doing this by Labor Day! All right, do it to it, Lars!::Lars: [standing by with a large hammer at the block] It's my honor, Tony. [Lars breaks the ice block while the campers freak out. Tony is unharmed]::Gerry: ...but we're afraid to follow.::Tony Perkis: [nighttime, the campers are around a large fire along with Tony] I know each and every one of you - because I WAS you!::Gerry: Once a day, the kids from Camp MVP, drive by and make fun of us.::MVP camper: [shows the MVP counselor and two campers driving by in a motor boat] [Into a megaphone] You STINK! You STINK! You STINK! You STINK! HA ha ha ha ha ha ha! [Gerry and Roy are ducked down in the water]::Gerry: At night... [shows some more MVP campers at the dock carrying cans of paint]... they vandalize our camp. [Pat is scrubbing it all off]::Gerry: [looks at Josh's empty bed and continues] At least Josh got out... where there's food. We have to resort... to more desperate measures. [Shows the campers chasing cows and shouting]::Gerry: Tony's arranged a dance with the girls' camp... so he can humiliate us into losing weight. Pray for me, Grandma. Love, Gerry.
Tony Perkis: Attention campers. Lunch has been cancelled due to lack of hustle. Deal with it.
Gerry: I'm not going to a camp with a bunch of fat loads!