Jesse Eisenberg's Greatest Hits, Vol. 1
By The Shouts Dept.
In anticipation of Eisenberg’s New Yorker Festival event, we invite you to revisit a handful of his finest Shouts.
Mysteries the Hardy Boys Faced as They Became Hardy Men
By John Ortved
“The Mystery of Joe’s Constant Trips Downtown,” “A Clue in the Search History,” ”The Phantom Condom,” and more.
Boehner to Continue Repealing Obamacare After Leaving Congress
By Andy Borowitz
Boehner said that he plans to begin every day with a good breakfast, some exercise, and a vote to repeal Obamacare before lunch.
Miraculous Occurrences During Pope Francis’s Visit to New York
By Luke Burns
The Pope went into a subway station and saw that he’d just missed the G train. But only five minutes later, another G train appeared.
Nation Thanks Pope for Briefly Bumping Trump from News
By Andy Borowitz
People are expressing profound gratitude that the news media is offering non-stop coverage of Francis’s every move.
Introducing Our Mind-Blowing Virtual-Reality App
By Will Stephen and Jack Pearce
Test-driving The New Yorker’s newest technological breakthrough.
Wisconsinites Alarmed That Walker Has More Time to Be Governor
By Andy Borowitz
Residents grappled with the realization that Walker would soon be back behind his desk performing his duties.
Going Off the Grid
By Jake Tuck
I’m starving. I find some berries, but I can’t consult the “Edible Berry or Nah” Twitter account, so I’m rolling the dice.
I Am the Pizza Rat
By Silvia Killingsworth
You know what never happens? Ever? No human in the history of New York has ever thrown away a fully intact, unblemished plain slice.
Kochs Demand Walker Return Nine Hundred Million Dollars
By Andy Borowitz
The billionaire Koch brothers demanded that Walker return the nine hundred million dollars they had allocated to his campaign.