Iowa (i/ˈaɪ.əwə/) is a state located in the Midwestern United States, an area often referred to as the "American Heartland". It derives its name from the Ioway people, one of the many American Indian tribes that occupied the state at the time of European exploration. Iowa was a part of the French colony of New France. After the Louisiana Purchase, settlers laid the foundation for an agriculture-based economy in the heart of the Corn Belt. Iowa is often known as the "Food Capital of the World".
In the latter half of the 20th century, Iowa's agricultural economy transitioned to a diversified economy of advanced manufacturing, processing, financial services, biotechnology, and green energy production. Iowa is the 26th most extensive and the 30th most populous of the 50 United States. Its capital and largest city is Des Moines. Iowa has been listed as one of the safest states to live in.
Iowa is bordered by the Mississippi River on the east; the Missouri River and the Big Sioux River on the west; the northern boundary is a line along 43 degrees, 30 minutes north latitude. The southern border is the Des Moines River and a not-quite-straight line along approximately 40 degrees 35 minutes north, as decided by the U.S. Supreme Court in Missouri v. Iowa after a standoff between Missouri and Iowa known as the Honey War.
It's all about the company you keep.
They promised him freedom...
Plot
A Florida con man uses the passing of the long time Congressman from his district who he just happens to share a name with, to get elected to his version of paradise, Congress, where the money flows from lobbyists. But soon he learns the nature of the game and decides to fight back the only way he knows how, with a con.
Keywords: adulterous-husband, cancer, con-artist, congressman, dying-during-sex, election, government, impostor, lobbyist, politician
From con man to congressman
Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Chairman Dodge, please! Would you tell him that it's Mr. Joshua Benjamin from the NAACP on the line! Actually Mame, you could be a great deal of help, I have a few minor questions. I would like to know how many members of the Chairman's committee are African American?... None... Well, surely, there must be a Latino member on the committee... No Latinos either... Ah! Does ah! the Chairman have any Asians or Native Americans on the Committee? No Asians and no Natives. Does the Chairman have any Handicaps or Gays on the Committee? No Gays. Well, thank you mame, you've been a great deal of help. Just forget I even called. Just tell him I said 'hi'.
Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Well I've got to do something to help these people.::Celia Kirby: Don't tell me you're actually developing a conscience.::Thomas Jefferson Johnson: God I hope not, it's gonna be a fuckin' nuisance in Congress.
Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Oh, well, I'm very flattered, Mr Chairman.::Dick Dodge: Dick.::Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Well, I'm very flattered, Mr Dick.::Dick Dodge: No, no, no, no.::Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Oh, I'm sorry, Chairman Dick.::Dick Dodge: No, Dick. Just Dick.::Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Oh, Just Dick. Just Plain Old Dick.::Dick Dodge: Yeah.::Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Oh, fine.
Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Terry, tell me something. With all this money coming in from both sides, how does anything ever get done?::Terry Corrigan: It doesn't. That's the genius of the system.
Thomas Jefferson Johnson: [to Celia Kirby] This is your uncle?::Elijah Hawkins: Yes, my niece tells me you're not HALF as slimy as I thought. That puts you somewhere between a lizard and a toad. Ha ha. Quite a step up, huh?::Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Thank you very much. Forgive me for staring. I don't know how I missed the family resemblance. She's you in a skirt.
Elijah Hawkins: Come on, Thomas! You're Dick Dodge's yes-man.::Thomas Jefferson Johnson: I am not a yes-man. When Dick says no, I say no.
[pretending to be Zeke Bridges]::Thomas Jefferson Johnson: I'm madder than a Baptist in a brothel, you som-bitch!::Thomas Jefferson Johnson: I tell ya, I'm bout as crazy as a dog in a hubcap factory.
[trying to bribe Congressman Dodge]::Olaf Andersen: This could mean six figures, Dick.::[Dick Dodge raises his eyebrows]::Olaf Andersen: [smiling] HIGH six figures.::[Dodge raises his eyebrows twice]::Olaf Andersen: [frowning] SEVEN figures?
Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Don't you love this Chairman? He's brought dignity back to the name Dick. No longer is it Tricky! Come on... Dick is Good! Dick is Good!
[blackmailing Congressman Dodge]::Thomas Jefferson Johnson: I want you to resign. You can tell people it's for health reasons. Most of us will believe that, cuz we've seen you in the steam room.
Relax it's over, you belong to me
I fill your mouth with dirts
Relax it's over, you can never leave
I take your second digit with me
Love
You are my first, I can barely breathe
I find you fascinating
You are my favorite, lay you down to sleep
It's all that I can do to stop
Love
So blue, so broken, paper doll decays
I haven't left you yet
So cold subversive, your eyes are full of bleach
Tomorrow, I will go away again
Love
You are mine, you will always be mine
I can tear you apart
I can recombine you
All I want is to covet you all
You belong to me
I will kill you to love you
Love, love, love
People change, families grow
There are hands I am holding
that I didn’t know
back when home was a place
and I thought that growing up was a phase
There are wrinkles on my hands
that weren’t there
when I started making plans
and plans change
Iowa, I don’t know how to leave you
don’t know how to tell you goodbye
Iowa, I am a field after harvest
sowing under a new sky, Iowa
My soul is weathered but green
When a storm passes over the roots are unseen
until all is laid bare
and the hope that I needed was already there
Iowa, I don’t know how to leave you
don’t know how to tell you goodbye
Iowa, I am a field after harvest
sowing under a new sky, Iowa
And there are wrinkles on my hands
that weren’t there
when I started making plans
and plans change, but you haven’t changed
Iowa, I don’t know how to leave you
don’t know how to tell you goodbye
Iowa, I am a field after harvest
I've never had a way with women, but the hills of Iowa make me wish that I could,
And Ive never found a way to say I love you, but if the chance came by, oh I, I would,
But way back where I come from, we never mean to bother,
We dont like to make our passions other peoples concern,
And we walk in the world of safe people, and at night we walk into our houses and burn.
Iowa oh ooo oh, Iowa oh ooooh ooo oh I-Iowa
How I long to fall just a little bit, to dance out of the lines and stray from the light,
But I fear that to fall in love with you is to fall from a great and gruesome height.
So I asked a friend about it, on a bad day, her husband had just left her,
She sat down on the chair he left behind, she said,
"What is love, where did it get me? Whoever thought of love is no friend of mine."
Ioway oh ooo oh, Iowa oh ooooh ooo oh I-Iowa
Once I had everything, I gave it up for the shoulder of your driveway and the words Ive never felt.
And so for you, I came this far across the tracks, ten miles above the limit, and with no seatbelt, and Id do it again,
For tonight I went running through the screen doors of discretion,
For I woke up from a nightmare that I could not stand to see,
You were a-wandering out on the hills of Iowa and you were not thinking of me.
Ioway oh ooo oh, Iowa oh ooooh ooo oh I-Iowa
I only knew you from
three months of tour and a cellular phone.
We talked of the Midwest
and I learned of all that you left behind.
Oh, and the loss runs deep.
Your father and a friend,
a rug pulled from your feet,
But I'll try and give you a place
to lay your tired head and hide your only face.
There's a bed waiting for you.
There's a light that I left on.
There's a purpose for the distance
and the things that I've done wrong
You came to stay with us.
A weekend itself [?]
you weren't missing much.
The day that you left it rained
and the cold weather up north was calling your name.
So I helped to pack your bags,
folding your shirts, the clothes on your back.
Home never felt so far.
In the morning I felt sweaters you dropped in my front yard.
There's a bed waiting for you.
There's a light that I left on.
There's a purpose for the distance
and the things that I've done wrong.
There's a place that you live in
a town that you call home.
There's a state that you visit
but you never stay too long.
You're careful how hold yourself.
I know,
you worry what might happen but i swear
it won't.
So I'm waiting for your voice to make a sound,
but i know every word before they leave your mouth.
There's a bed waiting for you.
There's a light that I left on.
There's a purpose for the distance
and the things that I've done wrong.
There's a place that you live in
a town that you call home.
There's a state that you visit
I've never had a way with women
But the hills of Iowa make me wish that I could
And I've never found a way to say I love you
But if the chance came by, oh I, I would
But way back where I come from we never mean to bother
We don't like to make our passions other peoples concern
And we walk in the world of safe people
And at night we walk into our houses and burn
Iowa, Iowa, I, Iowa
Iowa, Iowa, I, Iowa
How I long to fall just a little bit
To dance out of the lines and stray from the light
But I fear that to fall in love with you
Is to fall from a great and gruesome height
So you know I asked a friend about it, on a bad day
Her husband had just left her, she sat down on the chair he'd left behind
She said, "What is love, where did it get me?
Whoever thought of love is no friend of mine"
Iowa, Iowa, I, Iowa
Iowa, Iowa, I, Iowa
Once I had everything, I gave it up
For the shoulder of your driveway and the words I've never felt
So for you, I came this far across the tracks
Ten miles above the limit, and with no seatbelt, and I'd do it again
For tonight I went running through the screen doors of discretion
For I woke up from a nightmare that I could not stand to see
You were a-wandering out on the hills of Iowa
And you were not thinking of me
Iowa, Iowa, I, Iowa
Iowa, Iowa, I, Iowa
Iowa, Iowa, I, Iowa