The water buffalo or domestic Asian water buffalo (Bubalus bubalis) is a large bovine animal, frequently used as livestock in the Indian Subcontinent, and also widely in South America, southern Europe, the Middle East, northern Africa, and elsewhere.
In 2000, the United Nations Food and Agriculture Organization estimated there were approximately 158 million water buffalo in the world, with 97% of them (approximately 153 million animals) in Asia. There are established feral populations in northern Australia, but the dwindling true wild populations are thought to survive in India, Bangladesh, Nepal, Bhutan, and Thailand. All the domestic varieties and breeds descend from one common ancestor, the wild water buffalo, which is now an endangered species. The domestic water buffalo, although derived from the wild water buffalo, is the product of thousands of years of selective breeding in either the Indian Subcontinent or Southeast Asia.
Buffalo are used as draft, meat, and dairy animals. Their dung is used as a fertilizer, and as a fuel when dried. In the Chonburi of Thailand, Pakistan, and the southwestern region of Karnataka, India, there are annual water buffalo races known as kambala. A few have also found use as pack animals, carrying loads even for special forces.[citation needed]
Plot
It's been 5 years since socialite Ursula Stanhope left civilization to marry George, lovable and clumsy King of the Jungle. Now father to George Junior, George finds himself stressed at having to juggle his cherished roles of jungle king, Junior's dad, and Ursula's loving husband. George's stress level goes way up when Really Mean Lion challenges him for leadership of the jungle, and Ursula's mother Beatrice teams up with Ursula's ex-fiance Lyle in a plot to forcibly take away all that George holds most dear.
Keywords: boxing, british, british-accent, bully, bully-comeuppance, character-interacts-with-narrator, character-name-in-title, chase, comeuppance, comic-hero
Watch Out For That Sequel!
George: If George come home early, would Ursula still go out with George?::[Ursula smiles and nods]::George: George: Good. [turns and head hits hanging ornament]
Narrator: Huh? Wait a minute! Who the heck are you?::George: Me new George. Studio too cheap to pay Brendan Fraser.::George Jr: Ha ha ha. Let's go, dad! [runs off]::Narrator: How did you get the part?::George: New George just lucky, I guess.
[George crashes into tree]::Narrator: And in case you were worried, the new George takes a tree as well as Brendan Fraser.
Narrator: Now that the prince is turning five, George is grooming his son to be the heir to the throne.::[George is picking at Junior's hair]::Narrator: Uh... George, that's grooming him to be heir, not grooming his hair.
Narrator: With Shep down for the count, George felt the need to rally his troops.::George: Don't worry! George not know meaning of defeat! George not know meaning of most words. But especially defeat! And George will stand here just as long as George's name is...::[George gets conked in the head by two coconuts]::George: ...Herb.
Ape: I'm happy to see you too. What are you doing here?::George: George here to help. Tookie say Ape in trouble. Broke. Busted. No Benjamins.::Ape: Broke? It's all a big misunderstanding. I'm perfectly fine. That's why I'm... giving away all my furniture.::George: George happy Ape perfectly fine. Only wish George perfectly fine.::Ape: What's the matter?::George: Ursula think George spend too much time with animals. Animals think George spend too much time with Ursula. George so upset, think about taking off neck crown.
Lyle: I haven't been this disappointed since the sixth grade, when my sister stole my Shaun Cassidy lunchbox.::George: George confused.::Lyle: Shaun Cassidy was a popular TV character in the late 70s, along with Parker Stevenson. I followed both their careers, actually.::George: George not confused about Shaun Cassidy, George confused about unhypnotizing.
Narrator: Meanwhile, that dastardly duo of damsels, Sally and Kowalski, were searching every nook and cranny.::[Women search old woman]::Narrator: That's cranny, not granny!
George: George realize that in order to save tree house, Bukuvu, and entire jungle lifestyle, George now have to hit women. But, in name of sportsmanship, George give woman fighting chance.::[Kowalski kicks him in the crotch]::George: Note to George. Rethink sportsmanship.
Narrator: As George gleefully greeted his performing pals. Ursula wondered if she'd ever come first.::Ursula: [to herself] I wonder if I'll ever come first.
Plot
Ling Tang and his family live on his prosperous farm in rural Southern China and have not yet felt the impact of the Japanese invasion in the North. Tang's two oldest sons, Lao Ta Tan and Lao Er Tan are married and hard working while youngest son Lao San Tan remains a free spirit. Er's wife Jade is also willfully unconventional and desires to exercises her literacy skills by reading books, a most unfeminine practice in 1930's China. Tang's only daughter is married to Wu Lien, a city merchant who profits from selling Japanese goods. When the dreaded invasion reaches their village, the family is scattered as the sons join the resistance while Wu Lien survives by collaborating with the enemy.
Keywords: airplane, asian, banquet, based-on-novel, betrayal, bombing, book, brother-in-law, caucasian-actor-playing-asian-character, china
Lao Ta Tan - Eldest Son: [rhetorically] Do you not know that in a woman eagerness passes for weakness?
Lao Er Tan - Middle Son: I do not have the words.::Jade Tan: I am not very learned.::Lao Er Tan - Middle Son: Is that why you do not often speak to me?::Jade Tan: Two must speak for understanding.
Wu Lien: Yes, yes, I read often in the winter to warm my blood, sometimes in the summer to cool it.
Ling Tan: [to Jade] Remember, my child, that the woman is the root and the man is the tree. The tree grows only as high as the root is strong.
Japanese Official: [to restaurant waiter] Oh, no wine, hunh, and where are your women? [laciviously] There are other things than wine!
Wu Lien: I am neither for or against anything.::Jade Tan: What you are not for you are against.
Captain Sato: [rhetorically] How could we conquer a country without its traitors?
Ling Tan: How can you dig such a thing without help? The earth is stubborn.::Ling Tan's Wife: Heaven gave me the thought. Heaven will provide the help. The shovel is there.
Ling Tan's Wife: [referring to a Japanese officer] Why do you not defy him?::Ling Tan: Alive I can hold my land. Dead I can only hold as much as I am buried in.
Ling Tan: [referring to Jade's son] He has his eyes open. Make sure the one who teaches him has his eyes open.