Mohr, Jay Filmography

• Dumbbells
  2014, role: actor , character name: Harold
• Road Hard
  2014, role: actor
• The Incredible Burt Wonderstone
  2013, role: actor , character name: Rick the Implausible
• Wrestling Nice
  2013, role: actor , character name: Himself
• Archie Black: The Worst
  2013, role: actor , character name: Himself
• Pororo, the Racing Adventure
  2013, role: actor , character name: Chip Quackers
• Applebaum
  2012, role: actor , character name: Al
• Jay Mohr: Funny for a Girl
  2012, role: producer
• Jay Mohr: Funny for a Girl
  2012, role: actor , character name: Himself
• Brothers-In-Law
  2012, role: actor
• A Christmas Wedding Tail
  2011, role: actor , character name: Rusty
• On Set: The Making of 'A Christmas Wedding Tail'
  2011, role: actor , character name: Himself
• 2011 NHL Awards
  2011, role: actor , character name: MC
• 2010 NHL Awards
  2010, role: actor , character name: MC
• Katt Williams: 9 Lives
  2010, role: actor , character name: Himself
• Hereafter
  2010, role: actor , character name: Billy
• The 51st Annual Grammy Awards
  2009, role: actor , character name: Himself - Presenter
• The 35th Annual People's Choice Awards
  2009, role: actor , character name: Himself
• Lonely Street
  2009, role: producer
• 12th Annual Academy of Interactive Arts & Sciences Awards
  2009, role: actor , character name: Himself - Host
• Independent Vision: Lonely Street
  2009, role: actor , character name: Himself
• Lonely Street
  2009, role: actor , character name: Bubba Mabry
• The Making of the King
  2009, role: actor , character name: Himself
• Street Kings
  2008, role: actor , character name: Sgt. Mike Clady
• A Happy Death
  2008, role: actor , character name: Justin
• Untitled David Kohan/Max Mutchnick TV Project
  2007, role: actor , character name: Danny
• Saturday Night Live in the '90s: Pop Culture Nation
  2007, role: actor , character name: Various
• Getting Into the Action
  2006, role: actor , character name: Himself
• Community Service
  2006, role: actor , character name: Will Shepard
• Christmas Do-Over
  2006, role: actor , character name: Kevin
• The Groomsmen
  2006, role: actor , character name: Cousin Mike Sullivan
• Even Money
  2006, role: actor , character name: Augie
• Community Service
  2006, role: producer
• A Salute to the Troops and USO
  2006, role: actor , character name: TV Show Host
• King's Ransom
  2005, role: actor , character name: Corey
• Rockin' the Corps: An American Thank You
  2005, role: actor , character name: Himself - Comedian
• Saturday Night Live: The Best of David Spade
  2005, role: actor , character name: Airline Passenger
• Saturday Night Live: The Best of Alec Baldwin
  2005, role: actor , character name: Boyscout
• Celebrity Autobiography: In Their Own Words
  2005, role: actor , character name: Himself
• Road Trippin': The Making of 'Are We There Yet?'
  2005, role: actor , character name: Himself - 'Marty'
• Are We There Yet?
  2005, role: actor , character name: Marty
• Comedy Central Roast of Jeff Foxworthy
  2005, role: actor , character name: Himself
• Comedy Central Presents: 100 Greatest Stand-Ups of All Time
  2004, role: actor , character name: Himself #86
• Seeing Other People
  2004, role: actor , character name: Ed
• 101 Most Unforgettable SNL Moments
  2004, role: actor , character name: Himself
• WFA 2
  2003, role: actor , character name: Himself
• Sundance Film Festival Dailies
  2003, role: actor , character name: Host
• Mohr Sports
  2002, role: actor , character name: Himself - Host
• Brilliant But Cancelled
  2002, role: actor
• Saturday Night Live: TV Tales
  2002, role: actor , character name: Himself

Famous quotes by Jay Mohr:

"I wasn't the guy everyone liked. I was the guy that wouldn't shut up."

"I think I made a mistake once... yeah... it was only once."

"No, ... even when you're making fun of people in this business, they want to take credit for it. That's how big the egos are."

"You know how to tell if the teacher is hung over?? Movie Day."

"If it has to sell its mascot, your team sucks."

"If it doesn't know what to charge you for nosebleed seats, your team sucks."

"Unfortunately, there are no mulligans when it comes to pro football contracts."

"I was the youngest kid on my street, the youngest comic in the clubs. I always felt like I was playing catch-up. I was very angry."

"Why are baseball managers the only coaches who dress up like the players?"

"I wonder why there is a designated hitter in baseball after all these years? As an experiment, it seemed like a swell enough idea, but you would think the novelty would have worn off by now and everyone would get back to playing baseball."

"Marc Maron's podcast success has nothing to do with my podcast success. If I do a quarter of a million downloads, I can show that to an advertiser as a fact, and that's that."

"But if applause throws off your timing, then you're not the kind of comedian I would like to see. All you have to do is stand there and take it."

"Not everyone likes sports. Gandhi and Malcolm X come to mind."

"You know how to tell if the teacher is hung over? Movie Day."

"True Yankees are born, not made."

"I never minded George Steinbrenner spending obscene amounts of money to put the best product on the field."

"When human beings stop progressing at an endeavor, they stop enjoying it and move on to something else. Not golfers. Masochists, all of them."

"I think golf is a waste of time and a waste of a sunny afternoon. I also stink at it. I have never found anything, including divorce and a sexual harassment suit, more frustrating."

"Fantasy football is not only a good thing, but a great thing."

"I hate golf. I do not understand how anyone can enjoy it, much less love it."

• Lyrics: play full screen play karaoke
• No La Obliges - Jomar
• Nationalism And Heritage - Geimhre
• Battlefield Vinland - Geimhre
• Mallachd - Geimhre
• Satanic Degradation - Geimhre
• The Subhuman Prophet - Geimhre
• Any Further Word - Geimhre
• Battlefield Europe - Geimhre
• ... You Are Sheep - Geimhre
• Crushing Zion - Geimhre
• I Am The Wolf - Geimhre

Si tu sientes que ella a ti te esta mirando
No la obligues
Que ella solo va caer
La noche esta empezando
Si tu sientes que ella a ti te esta mirando
No la obligues
Que ella solo va caer
La noche esta empezando
(Buscando)
(Que ella sola va caer)
(La noche esta empezando)
(Buscando)
Si pide calor
Dale lo que esta buscando
Corre y daselo
Que estas esperando
No vez que ya
Ella se esta soltando
Woo!
La noche esta empezando
Si pide calor
Dale lo que esta buscando
Corre y daselo
Que estas esperando
No vez que ya
Ella se esta soltando
Woo!
La noche esta empezando
Si ella sigue mirandole
Esta deseandole
Y coqueteandole
Si ella sigue acercandoce
Y tu pegandote
Estan deseandose
Pero no la obligues
Si ella sigue mirandole
Esta deseandole
Y coqueteandole
Si ella sigue acercandoce
Y tu pegandote
Estan deseandose
Pero no la obligues
Si tu sientes que ella a ti te esta mirando
No la obligues
Que ella solo va caer
La noche esta empezando
Si tu sientes que ella a ti te esta mirando
No la obligues
Que ella solo va caer
La noche esta empezando
(Buscando)
(Que ella sola va caer)
(La noche esta empezando)
(Buscando)
Ella sola cae
Dejala que corra en overdrive
Anyway
Le gusta la estadia en Puruguay
Sin que sepa su dueño
Y se entere su mai
Y le gustan las caricias en over night
Pero no te asombres
Que no e' a mirar deja cadera
Toda una vaquera y en la cama es una fiera
Carga la sangre de la nueva era
O del equito de copera
Si pide calor
Dale lo que esta buscando
Corre y daselo
Que estas esperando
No vez que ya
Ella se esta soltando
Woo!
La noche esta empezando
Si pide calor
Dale lo que esta buscando
Corre y daselo
Que estas esperando
No vez que ya
Ella se esta soltando
Woo!
La noche esta empezando
Si tu sientes que ella a ti te esta mirando
No la obligues
Que ella solo va caer
La noche esta empezando
Si tu sientes que ella a ti te esta mirando
No la obligues
Que ella solo va caer
La noche esta empezando
Sigue Matandolos
Jomar ''El Caballo Negro''
New Records Baby
Mucho Caballo
Pa' Poca Cuadra
Dile Jomar
You Know

Our dedication to our homeland
Strength of the blood, victorious we stand
Follow the path of ancestral rights
The future forged in our purity
Snowfalls, our land turns white
Burn the cloud of mongrelism
freedom for both folk and future
May our bloodlines be secured
Segregate and devastate
Fists of the destroyers without mercy
May the fist burn in our hearts
And reduce the weak to ash
Sounds of the future whispered on icy winds
For the legacy of our forefathers
For lands which they fought for and founded
For our children and for our culture
For Nationalism and Heritage

White Race, prepare for war
Defend what is ours
White Race, fight for your lands
This battlefield Vinland
Oppressed by the might of Z.O.G
The many arms of Deception
Struck with both guilt and scorn
An outcast in our homeland
Bleed for your soil, bleed for you land
Stand tall proud White Man
Defend with honor, defend with pride
Your skin your battledress, your nation your bride
Look long in the eyes of foes
Surrounded by our enemies
Their faces etched in the back of our minds
For in this war, they'll be repaid in kind
Stand for your children, stand for your blood
Bleed with honor, bleed with pride
Your kin your legacy, battle for their lives
White Race, prepare for war
Defend the fourteen words
White Race, for nation and pride

Cum sol noster redibit
tum supra cos omnes calamitas concidet
Quod ii lux appelant, hoe nigrebit
et pestem filiis eorum feret
English Translation:
When our sun will come again
then a calamity will fall on them all
What they call light will turn dark

Cry of the mongrel upon deaf tears fall
Nation of Islam we gladly slaughter
Sleep soundly subhuma ns
Sleep soundly in graves
Pray for salvation
Pray to be saved
Bled of Honor, blessed with shame
Bear the burden of humiliation
We are the Great Satan
The end of your reign
Your people will die here
Coffins upon coffins
The slaughtered shall lay
We stand here as crusaders
To cease the Muslim plague
Subhumans with no pride
But we`ll have your blood and souls
So called Satanic Degradation
As you fall to the Western World
Coffins upon coffins
The slaughtered shall lay
We stand here as crusaders
To cease the Muslim plague
We are the Great Satan
The end of your reign

Within the filth of Mecca
Lived a pervert and a thief
Compulsive lying vermin
To lead the mass of sheep
Depraved religious despot
A rapist reaping sin
The lust for wealth and power
Corrupt the subhumans
Addicted to vice, striving for gain
The bastard child of rape and slain
Betrayed his own words, wed a Jew
A creed built on lies and fed to fools
Pedophile, liar, thief
The orphan of Mecca
Rapist, delusional pervert
The subhuman prophet
Revered charlatan, Hate be unto him
Pathetic infidel, preach his words to foolish men
Illiterate prophet, Hate be unto him
Day of judgment comes for the filthy subhuman
Pedophile, liar, thief
The orphan of Mecca
Rapist, delusional pervert
The subhuman prophet

My hands are so cold
what have I become?
I look at myself in a mirror - Monster!
This sterile breast of mine
procreates only dust now
If I could paintnew colors
they would be dawn.
What a sadness, it won`t take me
I won`t listen to any further word
What a sadness, it won`t take me
I won`t listen to any further word
I left all my precious spaces to unworthy people
who tore all my beauty and forgot everything
but now I will take my things back