Martin Charles Scorsese ( /skɔrˈsɛsɛ/; born November 17, 1942) is an American film director, screenwriter, producer, actor, and film historian. In 1990 he founded The Film Foundation, a non-profit organization dedicated to film preservation, and in 2007 he founded the World Cinema Foundation. He is a recipient of the AFI Life Achievement Award for his contributions to the cinema, and has won Academy Award, Palme d'Or, Emmys, Golden Globes, BAFTAs, and DGA Awards.
Scorsese's body of work addresses such themes as Italian American identity, Roman Catholic concepts of guilt and redemption,machismo, modern crime, and violence. Scorsese is hailed as one of the most significant and influential filmmakers of all time, directing landmark films such as Mean Streets (1973), Taxi Driver (1976), Raging Bull (1980), and Goodfellas (1990) – all of which he collaborated on with actor and close friend Robert De Niro. He won the Academy Award for Best Director for The Departed (2006), having been nominated a previous five times.
It's so beautiful here the swallows are swinging and swaying
Sweetly tweeding in the fruit trees
Sparrows hip hop into my hands
and somehow I hold them and gently pet their wings
Why does this happen here? Now?
I was in tears yesterday
Tattered and near lifeless
have I died and passed in to the after world?
I must have this is heaven
How did I get here?
Let me retrace my steps
What happened yesterday?
I was in tears, near lifeless
Something sad must have happened but what?
What was I crying about?
Is it over? Is it okay now?
Who am I talking to? What's going on?
Oh no, now the sparrow is broken and mangled in my bloody hands
This is so awful
Giant flying insects are crawling all over me
Biting and laughing
This is even worse than being alive
This is worse than being alive
Even worse than being alive
Spare the goats and spoil the lambs
Screamed the farm man
It's raining fireballs and boulders and radioactive debris
Run for your life and kill your wife
Cries the preacher
It's the end of the Christian era
You'll never make it no need to fake it
Giggled the Anti-Christ
Just put on an Otis Redding record and start the dance
Open the window and let the fresh air out
Said the television to the shackled children
I'm open, you can enter me
You can exit me, you never have to ask
I'm open, open my head
Cut open my head, take the lid off my head
Empty out my head
Plunge your hands into my open head
Take huge handfuls of head stuff
Make mudpies, make a sculpture
Make a collage of blood and brains
Make sweetbread and invite me to dinner
Enter me and exit me
I'm open
I'm open
(Repeat)
They can put a man on the moon
They can make soap out of people
And food out of wood
They can build machines that do the jobs of
Billions of human beings
They can feed the entire world
They can go zero to fifty in
Three point nine seconds
They can grow oranges in the desert
And tomatoes underwater
They can predict or affect the weather
Sometimes
They can create a disease
And then claim it's the cure
They can build superconductors
That will permanently alter
The way they live forever
They can make a coffee I like without caffeine
They can blow themselves up or away
I want to go to a place where nobody knows who I am
And come back to a place where everyone forgot who I was
I want to bury myself and rise from the grave and shower and shave and start over again
I want to be somebody else again
So I want to go away and come back and start all over again
I want to be somebody else again
I want to be somebody else again
Back in elementary school
Fourth grade, I think it was
I had this friend, Ethan
During lunch hour
We used to go to eighth street
For pizza and jelly donuts
Sometimes we got an orange Julius
Instead of a donut
Sometimes we got the donuts
But instead of eating them
We'd put them out on the street
And wait for cars to drive over them
But the most fun we ever had was
After eating
Sitting on a stoop
Exchanging sexual fantasies
Sometimes they involved
One of our classmates
Sometimes
It was a movie star
And sometimes
It was our teacher
Who we both suspected
Was sexually repressed
Sometimes I claimed
My stories were real
Like the story about the leather clown
She had short, spiky black hair
Small, but perfectly formed breasts
And was always kitted out
In the same outfit
Leather skirt
Fishnet stockings
Floppy shoes
A big, red nose
A pair of leather wrist bracelets
With spikes
A big, red smile painted on
And a big, shiny horn
Which she would honk and honk during sex
Until she had an orgasm
Whenever the circus would come to town
I would tell Ethan all kinds of kinky
Clown-domination stories
Involving the leather clown
Like the time
She forced me to have sex with her
In the little car
Or the time
She kept spraying me
With the seltzer bottle
Until I obeyed her every command
Ethan and I
We laughed and laughed at these tall tales
But I could tell
Deep down
He was wondering
Whether the leather clown
Was really real or not
Grayer than the widest overcast skies, these are Margaret's eyes
Grayer than the cigarette falling on the sofa, these are Margaret's eyes
Margaret has the grayest eyes I've ever seen
Grayer than the cigarette she puts out on
Grayer than the wall of a fallout shelter, these are Margaret's eyes
Grayer than the face on the Statue of Liberty, these are Margaret's eyes
Margaret has the grayest eyes I've ever seen
Grayer than the cigarette she puts out on me
She sits on the sofa
Me, I'm lying on the carpet
On the carpet
She smiles on the sofa
Me, I'm rolling on the carpet
On the carpet
There is a collar around my neck
There is a collar around my neck
There is a leash in her hand
Grayer than the blood that flows from a snowman, these are Margaret's eyes
Grayer than the cigarette falling on the sofa, these are Margaret's eyes
Margaret has the grayest eyes I've ever seen
Grayer than the cigarette she puts out on
Grayer than the cigarette she puts out on
When she closed her eyes
She saw her planet explode
When she closed her eyes
She saw her head explode
Then she saw that her planet
And her head were one
She saw everything
When she closed her eyes
(Repeat 2X)
She saw everything
When she closed her eyes
She saw everything
When she closed her eyes
She saw everything
I Wish I had a story to tell
I Wish I knew the story of the cardboard man,
Or the Talking filmcanister, Or the Spoon that Moved
I Wish I knew the one about the wise guru
Or the honest Lizard
I wish I knew about the dog that dressed like a cat,
Or the mule that walked like rock
Or the tornado who swam like a statue of Carmen Miranda
I Wish I knew all these stories or had the inclination to make them up
I Wish I could sit on soft pillows and drink molten lava
I Wish I could make love to the sky
I Wish I could eat the corn of Joy and Sorrow
I Wish the sky was green and my body was bright blue
I Wish I could talk sideways and backwards
I Wish I could drive the tractor of Innocence and return the the life I never
knew
I Wish I could drink chocolate champaigne
I Wish I had that Fax Number
I Wish I nothing could mean something and that everbody could have everything
Some wishes come true
Some of this wishes will come true
Others, are destined to become dreams deferred,
Shriveling up like grapes with sun tans,
But all is not lost,
No, all is not lost, not yet
I Wish I had 3 eyes, but of course, I have 3 eyes
I have clavoyant paranoia
I have precogant disetence
I have many other ways of seeing at my disposal
I have a garbage disposal, dinner plans and dog bisquets
I have many many options and a strong sense that freedom comes with in
But I shall never find it
Freedom is lost, Failure is just around the corner and the only thing that
Consoles me is the sound of my voice, and the fact that I don't cut myself
Mr. Johnson lives on the corner of our street
And he laughs at our bell-bottom trousers and our bare feet
And he calls us long-haired faggots as we walk by
But we don't get mad, because we know he's uptight
(Chorus)
Hey Mr. Johnson
Won't you wear this flower in your hair
Then you'll start seeing
Love is all around you everywhere
Love is all around you everywhere
I've known Mr. Johnson since before I was born
But he still gets mad when we smoke pot on his lawn
But we never get mad, we simply walk away
He don't mean to be a drag, he's just brought up that way
(Chorus)
Love is all around you everywhere
My heart is a flower,
Budding, blooming, dripping dew,
Dropping petals all over the place,
Making a big hopeless mess,
Stinking things up,
Waiting for someone to come over and suck the pollen out of me,
Suck me dry,
Til I wilt,
Til I am nothing,
Til next spring
Once there was nothing but nothingness
Then something happened and now there is somethingness
Now there is allness and tallness and smallness
Now there is roundness, profoundness and soundness
And silence and violence and now there are trees
And CD's and disease
And now there is now
Now there is now
Now there is now
I'd like to go to Scotland,
I'd like to wear I kilt,
I'd like to show off my two legs
And do just what I wilt
I'd like to go to Scotland
And show off my two thighs,
I'd like to wear a minikilt
And poke you in the eyes
I'd like to go to Scotland
And be so very bad,
I'd wear a micro minikilt
Faces on the walls
Invisible faces on the walls
Faces of criminals
Faces of animals
Telling me to cut up your corpse
Telling me to paint in your blood
Telling me to slice up your face
(Chorus)
Faces all over the wall
Telling me to paint in your blood
But I don't listen to them
No, I don't listen to them
(Chorus)
No, I don't listen to them
On the morning of the day of the Apocalypse
Willy woke up and made himself bacon and eggs and rye toast
He did usually eat bacon, but since today was such a special day,
He figured why not, like most people these days,
He had a hard time keeping his food down, but that didn't stop Willy from eating
He enjoyed food to much.
Willy went outside, he loved to breathe fresh air, but he went outside anyway
He decided to head across the street and visit his good friend Bob.
When Willy got to Bob's house, he found that Bob, in utter despair,
Had shot himself in the head,
"Some people have no patience whatsoever" Willy proclaimed,
Well, I'm not going to kill myself,
I'm sticking it out, today's a special day
The last day of planet Earth and I'm going to enjoy myself
Maybe today I won't go to the health spa,
Maybe I'll just stay here and drink all of Bob's beer
Or maybe when Bob's wife comes home, I'll take her out dancing
Yeah, that's it, dancing I'm going home to get changed
Willy raced out the door into the street, not noticing the runaway steamroller
That flattened him into a pancake in less that one second
I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
It's detachable.
[background singing begins: "detachable penis" over and over]
This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home, when I think it's gonna get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out, when I don't need it.
But now and then I go to a party, get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me
remember what I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment, and I couldn't find it.
So I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
'cause for some reason I leave it there sometimes
But not this time.
So I told them if it pops up to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really don't like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man,
and I really hate having to sit down every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house,
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev, and ate breakfast.
Then, as I walked down Second Avenue towards St. Mark's Place,
where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted twenty-two bucks, but I talked him down to seventeen.
I took it home, washed it off,
and put it back on. I was happy again. Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
but I don't know.
Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.
[background voices continue to sing "detachable penis" for
a while, then out]
Jesus Was Way Cool
King Missile _Mystical Shit_ Shimmy Disc
Jesus was way cool
Everybody liked Jesus
Everybody wanted to hang out with him
Anything he wanted to do, he did
He turned water into wine
And if he wanted to
He could have turned wheat into marijuana
Or sugar into cocaine
Or vitamin pills into amphetamines
He walked on the water
And swam on the land
He would tell these stories
And people would listen
He was really cool
If you were blind or lame
You just went to Jesus
And he would put his hands on you
And you would be healed
That's so cool
He could've played guitar better than Hendrix
He could've told the future
He could've baked the most delicious cake in the world
He could've scored more goals than Wayne Gretzky
He could've danced better than Barishnikov
Jesus could have been funnier than any comedian you can think of
Jesus was way cool
He told people to eat his body and drink his blood
That's so cool
Jesus was so cool
But then some people got jealous of how cool he was
So they killed him
But then he rose from the dead
He rose from the dead, danced around
Then went up to heaven
I mean, that's so cool
Jesus was way cool
No wonder there are so many Christians
There was a boy made out of china, Bone China.
Very fragile boy.
It was stupid to make a boy out of bone china,
What do you expect? He's not going to be good at any sports.
One wild pitch and his head is going to break off, probably.
So hes a gentle good boy who stays inside a lot,
and he hates school because other kids are always trying to break him, it's very bad.
It's very bad for the bone china boy, and it's not his fault.
He didn't asked to be made out of bone china,
he thinks it's stupid to be made out of bone china,
and he knows whos fault it is, it's my fault.
I invented the boy made out of bone china,
and he completly resents me for it.
The boy thinks I must be really angry.
Really full of repressed hostilities to have invented such a boy.
I must have a real sadistic streak,
I could just knock this boy over and he will break into a million pieces, no more bone china boy.
At least when I slipped on the ice, I
I got to go to the hospital
and lie in bed for days while people bring me food
and nurses come and give me Tylonal 3 with Codine
and I don't even have to get out of bed to urinate.
I just use this bottle that is kept conveniently by my bed
except that sometimes, when they empty it, they dont put it back where i can reach it
and sometimes, for example today, they didn't empty it for 6 hours and now it's full, and no one has been by for a long time
and when I called to ask a nurse to empty the bottle she said
she won't because its a shift change and its not urgent
and since she didn't speak english very well I just hung up on her,
but I don't even think she wrote a note or anything and when I just called again there was no answer.
And, you know, go ahead and complain bone china boy, you dont even have bodily functions.
You never have to go to the bathroom, you don't even know what it feels like to hold it in,
and if you slipped on the ice and broke your ankle it wouldn't even hurt.
Somebody could just take a hammer and just pound you to bits
and it wouldn't hurt you at all you just wouldn't be a bone china boy anymore, you'd be a bunch of broken pieces of bone china
and you wouldn't be able to cycle analyze me anymore
so dont give me any of that repressed hostility stuff.
Just stay on the mantle little bone china boy and I'll make you a deal, ok?
You leave me alone, and when I can walk again, I won't throw you out the window.
Is it a deal?
Frightened and Freezing
Everyone is so cold
Every time I touch something
My fingers get burned
Icy hot-scary world
Somebody is Howling
Nobody is hearing
Somebody is hungry
Nobody is hoping
Wicked and Windy World
Spinning too fast
Dizzy Sleepy
Don't Want to Be here, it's not
Not funny anymore
Everybody is an icicle
Everybody is a stone
Everybody have a gray face on
Everybody wanna be alone
Burning Smoking Melting
Boiling Burning Sweating
Melting Smoking Boiling
Sweating Burning Boiling
Melting Melting Melting
Frightened and Freezing
Everyone is so cold
Every time I touch someone
My body gets burned
Everybody is an icicle
Everybody is a stone
Everybody got their hot in a box
Everybody wanna be alone
I want to be different, like everybody else I want to be like
I want to be just like all the different people
I have no further interest in being the same,
because I have seen difference all around,
and now I know that that's what I want
I don't want to blend in and be indistinguishable,
I want to be a part of the different crowd,
and assert my individuality along with the others
who are different like me
I don't want to be identical to anyone or anything
I don't even want to be identical to myself
I want to look in the mirror and wonder,
"who is that person? I've never seen that person before;
I've never seen anyone like that before."
I want to call into question thevery idea that
identity can be attached
I want a floating, shifting, ever changing persona:
Invisibility and obscurity,
detachment from the ego and all of it's pursuits.
Unity is useless
Comformity is competitive and divisive and leads only to
stagnation and death.
If what I'm saying doesn't make any sense,
that's because sense can not be made
It's something that must be sensed
And I, for one, am incensed by all this complacency
Why oppose war only when there's a war?
Why defend the clinics only when they're attacked?
Why are we always reactive?
Let's activate something
Let's fuck shit up
Whatever happened to revolution for the hell of it?
Whatever happened to protesting nothing in particular, just
Jesus Was Way Cool
King Missile _Mystical Shit_ Shimmy Disc
Jesus was way cool
Everybody liked Jesus
Everybody wanted to hang out with him
Anything he wanted to do, he did
He turned water into wine
And if he wanted to
He could have turned wheat into marijuana
Or sugar into cocaine
Or vitamin pills into amphetamines
He walked on the water
And swam on the land
He would tell these stories
And people would listen
He was really cool
If you were blind or lame
You just went to Jesus
And he would put his hands on you
And you would be healed
That's so cool
He could've played guitar better than Hendrix
He could've told the future
He could've baked the most delicious cake in the world
He could've scored more goals than Wayne Gretzky
He could've danced better than Barishnikov
Jesus could have been funnier than any comedian you can think of
Jesus was way cool
He told people to eat his body and drink his blood
That's so cool
Jesus was so cool
But then some people got jealous of how cool he was
So they killed him
But then he rose from the dead
He rose from the dead, danced around
Then went up to heaven
I mean, that's so cool
Jesus was way cool
Holy holy holy all is holy in the sink in the sink all is holy holy holy down
the sink holy holy sinking down holy sinking down the hole down the sink holy
holy sinking holy holy down holy sinking sinking down the hole holy holy
all is holy all is holy down the sink in the sink all is holy all is holy in
the hole down the hole holy sinking all is holy in the sink sinking down the
holy sinking all is sinking down the hole holy sinking sinking down the hole
sink sink sink sink sink sinking down the holy down holy sinking down the sink
sinking holy down the sink holy holy holy sinking all sinking down the hole
holy holy all is sinking all is sinking all is isnking sink sink sink sink
(spoken)A-and this one's called "Cold Pool." I-it's not really painful at all; it's just very uncomfortable.(shouted)Ow! Fucking freezi� you gotta fucking be kidding me! Jesus God fuck. This is fucking fucking cold. Fuck! I can't take this! I'm getting out of here right now. Fuck this! Fucking freezing! Ow!
The brick house
The green trees
The parked cars
The rainy street
The brick houses
The green trees
The parked cars
The rainy streets
As I walked through Queens
I saw these things
I saw these things
As I walked through Queens
The brick houses
Next to the green trees
Growing over the parked cars
On the rainy street
I saw the brick house
I saw the green tree
I saw the parked car
I saw the rainy street
As I walked through Queens
I saw these things
And I thought of you
And I don't know why
The brick house
The green trees
The parked car
Transcribed by: ldoering@engin.umich.edu (Laurence Doering)
Subject: Detachable Penis
Date: 15 Dec 92 07:26:20 GMT
Detatchable Penis, by King Missile
I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
It's detachable.
[background singing begins: "detachable penis" over and over]
This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home, when I think it's gonna get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out, when I don't need it.
But now and then I go to a party, get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me
remember what I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment, and I couldn't find it.
So I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
'cause for some reason I leave it there sometimes
But not this time.
So I told them if it pops up to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really don't like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man,
and I really hate having to sit down every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house,
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev, and ate breakfast.
Then, as I walked down Second Avenue towards St. Mark's Place,
where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted twenty-two bucks, but I talked him down to seventeen.
I took it home, washed it off,
and put it back on. I was happy again. Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
but I don't know.
Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.
[background voices continue to sing "detachable penis" for
And then and then and so and life and see and look I mean like me and feel
and fly and go i mean like you and where and who and how and there and why
and so what
(various noises)
and now and no and yeah and uhh and so i mean like you now and stop and stay
I could be here
I could be in a salad
I could be out of town
I could be in paradise
I could be anywhere (x2)
I could be near the refrifgerator
I could be on the roof
I could be in Mesopatamia
I could be back in the salad again
I could be anywhere (x3)
I could be in Transit
I could be in bed
I could be incandescent
I could be in I could be out
It dosen't matter leave me alone
I could be anywhere (x4)
"Oh, how delicious!" The pig boy squealed
As another rush of pure pain came over him
Then Pig Boy declared
"This is what Pig Boy truly lives for
Pig Boy shall wallow
And sing in the mud and the blood
If only Pig Boy's eyes could be eaten by ants
If only Pig Boy could postpone joy forever
If only Pig Boy could become bacon boy
Pig Boy is tired of the struggle."
Just then Farm Boy came
And chopped off Pig Boy's head
As Farm Boy ate the bacon,
He began to feel queasy
"Say, Ma," said Farm Boy
"Are you sure this pork was prepared properly?"
"Why, of course I'm sure, Junior," Ma quickly replied
"Why would I want to poison my only child?"
Just then Farm Man burst through the door
Followed by the baby Jesus
"I think you're evading the issue again, Martha"
The big burly man shouted accusingly
"And I think it's about time someone taught you a lesson or two"
"You tell 'em, Dad," said Farm Boy
Who by this time was rolling on the floor in agony
Farm Man stomped the boy into the ground
Walked over to the stove and turned on the gas
He would have lit a cigarette
But he didn't have any
He had never smoked in his life
And this was no time to start
He stared coldly into Martha's understanding eyes
Farm Man began to weep
And he asked Martha if she wanted to go to a movie
They went to see Sallow
They loved it so much
That they sat through it twice
Completely forgetting the baby Jesus
Who was accidentally locked in the broom closet
And now, I would like to speak about fish
I have never spoken about fish before
At least, not that I can think of
So now would most certainly be a good time to do so
After all, there's plenty of fish in the ocean
And a fish in time saves nine
(Chorus)
Double fucked by two black studs
Double fucked by two black studs
Double fucked by two black studs
In the back of Sophie's Bar
(Chorus)
I was at Sophie's Bar on Fifth Street ??? ???
This woman was trying to impress me or something
She told me she had done it all sexually
She had heard it all
She had seen it all
And she had done it all sexually
She said she was jaded
So I asked her if she had ever been double fucked by two black studs
And she didn't tell me
She just got up and left
So I figured she probably hadn't
Ed was at the end of his rope, an expression he detested. "There is no
rope!" he would scream at the laughing walls. "There is only the end.
No hope, no rope. Ending is better than mending. Doors of perception,
windows of opportunity -- these are illusions, like the killing floor."
Ed spoke in a squeaky whiny voice with perhaps a slight tinge of glee,
but this was only because he couldn't be bothered to try to develop a
manner of speaking that truly reflected his mood. "This is a vaccuum.
There is no air in this room. Despair is no fun anymore. Nihilism
knocked three times on the ceiling, but the rosy fingers of dawn always
inserted themselves in the nose of unfulfilled promises. Angels sang
Heysanna Hosanna, paralyzed prima-donnas danced in the streets all day,
but when darkness came, everybody went home. I was ready - everyone
else was asleep. And while it may have been a relief to see that I was
right all along, here I am still: alone and trapped, awaiting the
endless end. And I can turn it all around, and laugh at it and laugh at
myself; I can laugh louder than the walls, the halls the waterfalls,
louder than Charles de Gaul or Fulton Mall, but I don't know what I'm
laughing at, I don't know just what I think is so goddamn funny. I
don't know why I don't just shut up and give up and lay down and die.
What do I have to complain about anyway," Ed asked his Picasso, "I'm a
millionaire!" This wasn't exactly true. Ed's Picasso was an obvious
forgery, his three Rothkos had just been singled out in an article in
ARTFORUM entitled "The three most insignificant paintings of Mark
Rothko," and his Barbara Kruegers had been irreparably damaged by Rein
Sanction and a few other bands from Gainesville that refused to
acknowledge the value of art.
"Come to think of it," Ed mused to the laminated roadkill coffee table
that he had purchased when times had seemed slightly less bleak, "Come
to think of it, not onl does art have no intrinsic value, but my
collection has no extrinsic value either. I know I'm not a millionaire,
but that's no reason to complain. There is no reason to complain.
There is no reason to do anything. I don't believe in reason, objective
reality, or collective farming. I don't believe in public speaking,
which is another reason why I'm here alone. I don't believe in life or
death, I would kill myself, but I don't believe in suicide." Ed put on
a red shirt and took a quick walk around the block while whistling
softly to himself. He reentered his apartment screaming, "There is no
life on this planet! Jehovah-One replaced all life with machinery five
centuries ago. the so-called industrial revolution was just another
hoax and we all fell for it, 'cause we were all programmed to. Even I
fell for it, I believe in the steam engine, even though I don't believe
in anything. Logical inconsistency is the Mr. bubble I bathe in each
and every evening, except for yesterday evening, when I rollerbladed
over to the Masonic temple to play pinochle with Pope John Paul the
First. I really had no choice in the matter." "Ed certainly could go
on and on, and he did, and he would, and he will, until you or I or
somebody does something about it." Senator Sterno of Arkansas announced
over closed circuit television. "And as long as he continues to
pontificate pointlessly, I will do nothing." Ed walked away from the
program feeling fortified and stapled. His brain was buzzing, the was
it always did just after Jeopardy. He loaded up the microbus with
Atlases and poseidons and headed for Pope county.
"I've had it." He sang, "I've had it with puns, alliteration, russian
literature, Italian neorealism, meaningless cross references and laundry
lists of nonsense. I shall dive without a license, without clothing,
without direction and if I make it to Louisiana, fine, and if I'm
running late, if I'm running a numbers game, it doesn't matter, I shall
keep on running. Yes, this is the answer. This is the ending, I shall
keep on running, because a body in motion tends to stay emotional, and
it's better to feel. Pain is better than emptiness, emptiness is better
In this happy sing-song hell hole
In this torture house of glee
In this perfect playpen prison
There's so much to do and see
On this euthanasia morning
Colorful carnival of pain
Let us drink delicious poison
If they won't let us, let's complain
Genetic engineers
Crucified our sacred hymns
While flesh fell off our bodies
(spoken)
And this one is called "Stomach Cramps."
(shouted)
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Shit! Ow! Ow! Fucking stomach cramps. Ow! Ow! Ow! This is - oh my God. Ow! Ow!
(spoken)
I'll be okay. I just gotta lie down for a few mi-
(shouted)
Ow! Ow! Fuck! Ow! Ow! Fuck! Ow!
She had nothing to say
She had nothing to say
"Well, that's a start," she thought to herself
And she picked up her pen and the small notepad
And she laid down on her bed
Paralyzed, she held the pen
Oh, maybe eight millimeters from the page
For at least a half an hour
And then she thought to herself,
"Oh, who am I kidding?
I know I have nothing to say."
She wanted to throw the pen away
No, she wanted to take a hammer
Pound the pen into her skull
Blood gushes out like Old Faithful
World engulfed in a red sea
The final flood
No, screw the pen
Keep the hammer
Get a chisel
Sculpt away at the skull
Reveal the ivory woman in agony
Hidden within
"No, screw those ideas," she said
"I'm just gonna write," she said
"I don't care if I got nothing to say
I'm just gonna scribble away
Until I find something"
Yeah, but she's crossing out every other word
She knows she's not fooling anybody
She knows she has nothing to say
Why are we trapped here in the dark so long?
It's so wet and dark and cold
We've done everything you told us to do
We've done everything you told us to do
Are we going to have to suffer forever?
Why are we trapped here in the dark so long?
We've done everything you told us to do
We've done everything you told us to do
We don't belong here
We were meant to sing
Let us out, let us
We're drowning in quicksand
We're freezing in the water
We hallucinate in the darkness
We're praying for deliverance
We've done everything you told us to do
We've done everything you told us to do
We don't belong here
We want to go out and play
We don't belong here
We were meant to sing
Let us out, let us out
I don't know what it is
That is or isn't inside me
That gives me that empty feeling inside of me
A voice said to put it all down
Pretend that it's all just a lie
When the lamb and lion lay down
Side by side
Pigs will fly
Little one
Pigs will fly
I don't know what it is
That gives me that empty feeling
A feeling that can't be filled
With sex, food or coffee
But one thing I know
There is blood in the sky
When the lamb and the lion lay down
Side by side, pigs will fly
I see not, I say not
I cannot say why
I say not, I see not
I cannot say why
There is blood in the sky
There is mud in my eye
Nah, but
I'm sorry
But look I'm sorry
But, Rock n Roll?
Rock n' Roll will never die
It's going nowhere
It's here to stay
What are you, fucking stupid?
I'm sorry but nah but you're fucking high
If you think rock n' roll will ever die
You're cracked up out of your fucking mind
Nah 'cause Rock n' Roll is here to stay
It will never go away
Look at Def Leopard
Drummer's got one fucking arm
Look at the Rolling Stones
They've been around for forty five fucking years
Look at Guns and Roses
Need I say more
Nah 'cause I'm sorry
But look I'm sorry but
But Rock n' Roll is not moving
It's going nowhere
It's here to stay
to live here now
lying down
living as one of the bloodless
having been down with bloodletting
having let all of the blood out
having been bled dry by leeches
having let leeches bloodlet you
lying lifeless and bloodless
you lie as you live
without life
lying lifeless and bloodless
living lifelessly
bloodlessly
bleeding without bloodshed
all blood having been shed
the shower of leeches that sucked you dry
the shower of blood that cleanses and dies
dyes you red dyeing
red lying
dead lying
bled shedding
bloodletting
shining in red
said the lecherous leech
lead
bleed
feed the red anger
drown in the shower
bathe in the blender
the sender-receiver of life
that you lie; that you dye as you bleed
as you flee like a leech
unleashed
released
deceased
insist
refuse
resist
transfuse
ooze
snooze
dream
awaken
get the lead out, let the blood out x8
Once there was an adorable little bunny that hopped and bopped through the cotton fields eating carrots all day long.
The people loved him and thought he was so fucking cute and sweet and good,
And he hated that.
He liked to eat the carrots, but that was about it.
He had seen this movie Willard about a bunch of rats who eat Ernest Bordenine and a bunch of other people, who are Mean to Willard,
Then they eat Willard because he tried to poison them.
The adorable little bunny thought this was so cool.
The bunny was tired of being cute and cuddly in the cotton field.
The bunny wanted to go north, to the big city,
And play in the garbage and scare people by slithering around in the subways and on the streets.
Bunny bunny wanted a rat tail, not a bushy cotton tail.
Bunny bunny wanted to screech, like a rat, instead of a bunny.
Bunny wanted to stop hopping; it was undignified and adorable.
And bunny wanted to be more omnivorous.
Carrots were ok but it would be so cool to eat stuff that other people would throw away.
It would be like recycling.
It would be better for the environment." bunny would rationalize.
"People can eat carrots; I'll eat what the people throw away
I'll live inside walls and screech and if anyone ever tries to pat me again,
I'll bite them and, hopefully, give them rabies.
Oh! What a wonderful life it would be,
To just be a rat!
There is one thing that really bugs me about this dream, however." said bunny bunny
"It's how formulaic and pedestrian this story is. I mean, it's completely obvious that I'm going to meet some magical wizard, or find some occult book, or some rat dust, or be captured by scientists who are working on some bunny to rat gene splicing experiment or something like that. At any rate, there is no question that I will get my wish and get to live in the big city, scare some people, eat and play in that garbage, run around in the subways, till one day, I accidentally eat rat poison or get caught in a glue trap and either decide it was all worth it anyway because my dream finally did come true or otherwise feel cheated because it wasn't as much fun as I thought it was going to be. But no matter what, the rest of my life is entirely predetermined. I don't see how I can go on or how I could possibly enjoy being a rat for a single second when I have already worked out my destiny in my little bunny head. I can't think of a single reason for continuing with this charade for another second. I'm getting out now. Fuck this. Find some other bunny stooch to be your rat for the day. I'm hopping the fuck out of here, right now."
In fact, let me finish this story for you, you pathetic pedestrian hack.
Bunny bunny hopped off in a great big huff, ate 100 carrots in a row, and died of vitamin A poisoning.
The end.
one day
what if one day?
what if I say?
I wish I was a tree and then suddenly I was a tree, then could I wish myself back?
no trees cant wish
what if I wished I was a wishing tree?
a tree that could wish
what if I wished I was a toilet bowl
and then I was one, and the wind changed
and I stayed that way?
or, that if I wished I was a toilet bowl, and suddenly I was a tree?
would I be able to say "hey I wanted to be a toilet bowl not a tree no I wouldn't be able to say that, trees cant talk they don't have any mouth
I would have to have the foresight to say "I wish I was a toilet but if I changed id turn into a tree instead, I wish Id be a tree with a mouth and could wish anything and change back into a human being, because Id only ever want to be a toilet or a tree for a varied period of time.
I guess
this is the exact reason
why they always say
you should be very careful what you wish for
A narrative framework
Another break with illusion
A cognitive fallacy
Imaginary reality
These are all lies
These are all lies
Nocturnal emission
Fraternal incision
Internal submission
Eternal division
All of this fakery
Artifice, trickery
Phoniness, fakery
Arificial, artificial
All of this fakery
Artifice, trickery
Phoniness, fakery
Arificial, artificial
Taking it easy
This could be all there is
Taking it easy
Maybe it comes too soon
May never happen again
Saying it's all for nothing
May never get there again
May never happen again
All of this fakery
Artifice, trickery
Phoniness, fakery
Arificial, artificial
All of this fakery
Artifice, trickery
Phoniness, fakery
Arificial, artificial
Typical, typical
Typographic hypodermic
Demographic epilogues
Illogical dialogues
Biological monologue
Obsolete novelty
Original replicas
Typical typical
These are all lies
These are all lies
All of this fakery
Artifice, trickery
Phoniness, fakery
Artificial, artificial
Artificial, artificial
These are all lies
These are all lies
These are all lies
These are all lies
All lies
Faces on the walls
Invisible faces on the walls
Faces of criminals
Faces of animals
Telling me to cut up your corpse
Telling me to paint in your blood
Telling me to slice up your face
(Chorus)
Faces all over the wall
Telling me to paint in your blood
But I don't listen to them
No, I don't listen to them
(Chorus)
No, I don't listen to them
Because I love you
He looked late 30's maybe mid 30's
Tall maybe 6 feet,
I saw him in the Guatemalan clothing place
He was thin and hungry
They sold jewlry there too
I noticed some bracelets with sandscript writing on them
I think the woman behind the counder was indian, not american indian, indian indian she had a wierd smile on her face as I walked in
I was looking at the bracelets, he said he was looking for work, he said I applied for work as a dishwasher
as a dishwasher
as a...dishwasher
as a dishwasher over at the hotel i'll find out tomorow but if they dont there is six other places looking for dishwashers
She is smiling at him
and im realizing now hours later she didnt know him, he says "see ya" and leaves and im still looking at stuff
She looks real nervous
Shes not indian, too light skinned maybe...i dont know
But she didnt speak english very well but he says "see ya" and Im looking at stuff
im realizing now hours later she didnt...she didnt know him, she was just going along with him
And he obviosly not a customer either because he said he was looking for work
He applied for work as a dishwasher
as a dishwasher
as a dishwasher
they dont make alot of money
something was going on he was deprate maybe he went in there to try to sell someting, no i think he was trying to distract her so he could maybe take someting.
He was thin and hungry and desprate
I mean he obviosly wasnt a customer but I didt figure it out till later after the movie Im walking back and im playing the movie back in my head im playing the scene back in my head in the store
He looked late 30"s maybe mid 30"s
Maybe six feet in the guatamallan clothing place
They sold bracelts with sandscript writng on them
The woman looked light skinned, she didnt speak englsih very well
I should have done someting
I should have realized
I should have paid attention
I should have been awake
He told her he was looking for work as a dishwasher
as a dishwasher
as a...dishwasher
I didn't really get a good look at him
He looked like a dishwasher
I belived him
But, now I think he was lying
I think he took something
She seemed real nervous
I should have done something
I didnt know
I wish I had done something
I didnt know
Is she alright?
Do you think he...?
Did she identify him?
If shes dead now? How did you get my name?
I dont know any dishwashers
...no i never was in veitnam
She definetly wasnt Vietnamese
Is she dead?
Do you think he...?
He looked late 30's
I think he stole something
DO YOU THINK HE KILLED HER?
He looked late 30's maybe mid 30's
Tall maybe 6 feet, I saw him in the Guatemalan clothing place
He was thin and hungry
They sold jewelry there too I noticed some bracelets with sandscript writing on them
I think the woman behind the counder looked like she was indian, not american indian, indian indian she had a wierd smile on her face as I walked in
I was looking at the bracelets, he said he was looking for work, said "I applaied for work as a dishwasher
as a dishwasher
as a dishwasher
as a dishwasher
Sex with you is all I want,
Sex with you and sometimes food is all I really want,
Sex with you and sometimes food and maybe a movie or a play
Is all I really want today
Sex with you and sometimes food and maybe a movie or a play and sleep,
But not too much at all, is really all I want.
Sex, food, movie, play, sleep...
Shower, a shower with you and some shampoo would be oh so good
Sex with you and sometimes food and a movie or a play,
Some sleep, a shower and a shampoo with you is all I really want.
Sensitive Artist
by John S Hall
King Missile (dog fly religion) _Fluting On The Hump_ Shimmy Disc 1987
I am a sensitive artist...
I am a sensitive artist.
Nobody understands me because I am so deep.
In my work I make allusions to books that nobody else has read,
Music that nobody else has heard,
And art that nobody else has seen.
I can't help it
Because I am so much more intelligent
And well-rounded
Than everyone who surrounds me.
I stopped watching tv when I was six months old
Because it was so boring and stupid
And started reading books
And going to recitals
And art galleries.
I don't go to recitals anymore
Because my hearing is too sensitive
And I don't go to art galleries anymore
Because there are people there
And I can't deal with people
Because they don't understand me.
I stay home
Reading books that are beneath me,
And working on my work,
Which no one understands
I am sensitive...
To Walk Among The Pigs King Missle
(Transcribed by ear)
To walk among the Pigs,
To go where the Pigs go,
And do as the Pigs do.
To inhale the pungent stench of the Pigs,
And truly savor the Scent.
To sing the Song of the Pigs,
To build up a repoire,
To be one with the Pigs.
To work shoulder to shoulder with the Pigs,
On Piglike projects.
To sweat like a Pig,
And then to realize that Pigs never sweat.
To wallow in the mud with the Pigs.
To experience absolutely all that Pigness entails.
To hear,
To see,
To feel like a Pig.
To think,
Eat,
And smell like a Pig.
To comprehend completely what it is to be a Pig.
To fully understand that you,
The Pigs,
And all other things in the Universe,
Are of the same ilk.
And then, to weed out all Non-Piggish things,
To fully cultivate and allow to blossom,
The Flower that is the Pig within your Soul.
And to finally stand alone,
In the Garden of the Absolute,
And pray,
And pray,
And pray,
I saw an episode of the Jerry Springer show and the topic was "Tranvestites and the Men Who Love Them." And the guy who was on with his "girlfriend" was saying "To me, this is a beautiful woman. She's got a perfect body, beautiful blonde hair, everything. I love her, and I love making love to her. Now I ask you, does that make me gay?"
Most of the audience thought so, and so did I, but it got me thinking about what is or isn't gay.
Discussing sex with a guy is gay.
Discussing sex with a woman is straight, even telling a woman "Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to suck a cock" is straight.
Sports are gay, especially contact sports, unless you're the only guy on both teams, in which case it is straight.
Gyms are always gay, because afterwords, in the locker room, you're showering with guys, and that is gay.
Watching pornography alone is neutral, like eating a sandwich. It's neither straight nor gay.
Watching pornos with one or more other guys in the room, no matter how many other women are also in the room, is gay.
Watching porn, even gay porn, with one or more women ONLY is straight.
Here's an interesting one: kissing a gay guy on the cheek, or having him kiss YOU on the cheek is neutral, as long as the guy is out of the closet. Hugging and/or kissing a straight guy . . . is gay.
See, look, I . . . I know I'm homophobic, but not about gay guys. They don't bother me at all. It's straight guys who don't know they're gay.
They fuck my shit right up.
Like a guy calls me up and says "A bunch of us guys are gonna sit around in our underwear and watch a football game and drink beer and eat chips, and, you know, maybe wrestle with each other a little, you know, just us guys! You wanna come over?"
And I'm like "No."
OK, you've got a guy sucking your dick, even if he's dressed like a beautiful woman, even if he's got the best breast implants you've ever seen, even if you're saying "Suck it bitch, I know you like it, you slut, you whore," that's gay.
Adversely, if a woman straps on a dildo and you're dressed like a woman and you're suckin' her cock and she's sayin' "You like it, don't you, you like sucking my dick, you little fucking faggot" and she rolls you over and fucks you in the ass and says "you love it, you little pussy boy, you love getting fucked in the ass, I bet you wish I was a man, I bet you wish this was a cock, you fucking faggot" and you're getting off on this like you've never gotten off before . . .
that's still straight.
But then, when you go off to the bar, and you discuss this, or any other sexual experience with any other guys, that's gay.
Here's the most interesting one:
Sucking a guy's cock, can, under certain rare circumstances, be straight.
Let's say you've gotten into a betting game with a woman, and the bet is whoever loses has to be the other's sex slave for the night, the kind of thing that happens in Penthouse Forum all the time, and you lose, and the woman makes you have sex with another guy, that's not gay.
Posted By: Font (Font)
Date: Wed Feb 27 01:12:27 1991
Title: Gary And Melissa
Gary and Melissa
John S Hall/Dave Rick
from the King Missile album _Mystical Shit_ on Shimmy Disc
Gary and Melissa
Loved to make love
Loved to make love
Loved to make love to each other
Over and over and over again
For the first few weeks of their relationship
They made love four or five times a night
They were really turned on for awhile
Then to enhance their passion
They bought sex books
The Joy of Sex
The Sensous Couple
The Joy of Sex Part 2
The Kama Sutra
Even Yet More Still Joy of Sex
Popular Mechanics
Betty Crocker
Anything
They tried as many positions as they were capable of
Physically
Physically
Physically
They were really turned on for awhile
Then to heighten their passion
They bought sex toys
Ben-wa balls
French ticklers
Nipple clamps
Cock rings
Whips and chains and bondage gear
Bowling balls
Dildos
Vibrators
Watermelons
Commemorative Statuettes of Liberty
Anything
They were really turned on for awhile
They set up a video camera
And taped themselves having sex
Then they watched it on the VCR
While having more sex
Then to heighten their passion
Gary taped Melissa having sex with some of his friends
And Melissa taped Gary having sex with some of her friends
Then they watched it on the VCR
While having more sex
They were really turned on
As the years went by
Gary and Melissa became fine upstanding members of their community
Although they never married
Their relationship outlasted all the marriages on their block
And they never fought
Except to heighten their passion
They had made an agreement
That when one of them died
The other would continue to live with and make love to the corpse
But as luck would have it
They were both killed in a freak accident
And died at the exact same moment
He needed more time
He needed more space
He needed more money
He needed more friends
He needed more music
He needed more food
He needed more drugs
He needed more color
He needed more sex
He needed more mass
He needed more height
He needed more pull
He needed more slack
He needed to stop jerking around
And get his stuff together
He needed a job
He needed a new direction
He needed religion
He needed a television set
He needed some good advice
He needed discipline
He needed discipline
He needed discipline
He needed a ticket
On the next train out of town
He needed to try harder
He needed less pressure on him
He needed a T-shirt
He needed to go to the bathroom
He needed to chatter incessantly
He needed to conquer universal themes
He needed to wax poetic
He needed an audience
He needed a dancing partner
He needed new clothing
He needed a pet to run to
He needed to feel
Like he was getting in the way of progress
He needed a dog
He needed to get his apartment cleaned
He needed to write a grocery list
He needed to paint
Sometimes on the subway he felt like a little bunny rabbit
With a cute little bunny nose
And long floppy ears
And a brand new submachine gun
And a big bushy tail
Because the little bunny wanted to kill everyone
Because the little bunny wanted to kill everyone
They put him in the box
And they gave him toys to play with
They gave him the best of Beethoven
And a bowling ball
And they told him to invent games
They told him to play music
They told him to write stories
They told him if he did these things
They would let him out of the box
They would let him out of the box
They would let him out of the box
And he did these things
And he did them incredibly well
But they didn't let him out of the box
They lie (13X)
This is what he learned
I remember the last time I donated blood
The nurse put a bandage on my arm. She told me
Not to remove it for six hours
The time was five o'clock, and at about ten to six
I was having an early dinner with some friends
In a pretty nice restaurant
I was embarrassed enough that I had short sleeves on
The bandage made me look downright silly
So I removed it slowly, surreptitiously
So no one would see
Suddenly, a thin but powerful stream of blood
Started gushing out of my arm
It hit a man sitting directly opposite from me
Splashing off of his head and onto the floor
A waiter delivering a bowl of chicken noodle soup
To a nearby table slipped,
The bowl went flying and landed on his head
I was completely covered with noodles
And I disappeared
Well, I learned my lesson that day
And the next time I give blood
I'll wear long sleeves
Take me home, take me home
Take me home and throw me down
Take me home, take me home
Take me home and tie me up
Cuz you're the one my body's been waiting aching for
You're the one I need in my darkest hour
You're the one who knows what a hypocrite I am
You're the one who knows my life is a pathetic sham
Take me home, take me home
Take me home and tie me up
Take me home, take me home
Take me home, and spit in my face
Take me home, take me home
Take me home and kick me hard
Cuz you're the one I trust enough
You're the one I trust enough to hurt me
You're the only one, I want you to give me what I deserve
In order to remember your dreams,
You must think of them as if they were little kittens.
When you wake up in the morning,
Before you get out of bed,
Sit up and say, "Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty."
If this doesn't work,
You must go into the kitchen and pour out a saucer of cream.
Place it by the foot of the bed and say, "Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty
kitty.
Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty."
When the kitty gets the cream,
The dream is remembered.
If Only
by John S Hall and Dogbowl
King Missile (Dog Fly Religion) _They_
Shimmy Disc Europe SDE 9023/CD 1990
If only x 4
If only x 4
If only we could turn our heads into melons
Then we could squeeze them
And they would produce delicious juice
If only we could turn our heads into breads
We could slice ourselves up and make sandwiches [Sandwiches]
If only we could turn our heads into cheeses
We could jump into a mushroom omelette
And make it taste oh so much better
turn our heads into leaves of lettuce
Hanging out with the salad bowl
With tomatoes and carrots and some blue cheese dressing on top
That would be quite fine I think
If only we could do that
[If only x 2]
But we cannot
We cannot turn our heads into any kind of food at all
It simply cannot be done
No I never was in vietnam
I never once dove into an empty swimming pool
I never let the carpet walk right out from under me
I never painted a house or a tree
I never did become an exotic dancer or a customer service representative
I never took the pulse of a dying duck
Or gave mouth to mouth resusitation to a horsefly
In a way I spose you could say my experience is quite limited
For example,
I never locked Oliver Cromwell in a brrom closet while singing Waltzing
Matilda
I never sawed a television in half
Although I once saw Wendy O'Williams saw a guitar
I never played a decent game of jacks
I never played poker with a toothless one eyed pirate who kept picking his
teeth with a bowie knife to distract me while his parrot looked over my
shoulder and told him what cards I had by using an elaborate code involving
vomiting, chirping and sea shanties
I never bought a lamp
Wait I did buy a lamp once
But I never bought a lantern or a lambskin profolactic
I never bought lima beans or lime pudding
I never bought a lion or a Lionel Richie album
I never bought anything beginning with the letter "L"
Except lollipops, lightbulbs and lettuce ... and the lamp
I never layed down for a nap and found the Everly brotehrs in bed with me
I never let a cyborg take out the garbage
I'm sorry I stole the radio
I did it
I sawed the legs off the periodic table
I re-elected the President
I did it, it was my fault
I farted in the church
I'm sorry I did many many bad things
Cherry on the top
Like a nuclear warhead
Nuclear bomb
Gonna lift the trigger
I had a
Dog Fly Religion
Neutron
On a chocolate sundae
Look, mom
Fallout is stuck between my teeth
Atomic toothpick
Picks the ????
Clean it out
Like a yum, yum, yum
Then blow out my brains
With a shotgun gun
I had a smile
Like old Jim dandy
Radio, radioactive candy
Yum, yum, yum
Cherry on the top
??? and ??? and ??? and ???
Bloody tons of snot
And blow out my brains
With a shotgun gun
Fun, fun, fun
In the sun, sun, sun
Potato dogs
Dogs that fly
Real dogs ??? ???
(Pluck out my eyes)
Pluck out my eyes on Sunday
Blow out my brains on Tuesday
World War Three is a giant ice cream cone (8X)
No more nukes, pluck out my eyes (2X)
Look at all my socks
Oh, so many, many socks
I can't even believe it
Can you imagine having so many socks?
I can't even begin to count them all
Let alone even think about wearing them
So many socks, how did I get so many?
Where did they come from?
Hey, why do I have so many socks?
I'm inundated, I can't, no, I'm sorry, this won't do
I cannot have this, this is too many
I cannot have this many socks, this will not do
Please take some of these socks immediately away at once
Ah, yes, that is much better, thank you
This is much more manageable, this is quite good
This is quite precisely the quintessentially right number
Bassinets, clarinets,
Proletarian chariots
Polyunsaturated cinemaplexi-
Glass cathedrals
Anxious daffodils
Falling off the window sill
But better still a sleeping pill L-tryptophan's illegal
Squirming, unlearning
Swirling in a cloud of unknowing
Silence, violence
Swirling in a cloud of unknowing
Hellacool swimming pools
Corporate tools vestibules
Herring bones monotones
Macrocosmic snowcones
Stroking the ego
Wrapping it up in swaddling clothes
Anointing it with aluminum foil
Squirming, unlearning
Twirling in a clowd of unknowing
Silence, Violence
Twirling in a clowd of unknowing
Aluminum siding salesmen
Drowning in a sea of alliteration Relentlessly searching for
Non existent clarity
Big fat bluffin' anguished muffin
Bad Brain H.R. Puffinstuffin
Dirty sosck, Onobox
Goldilox and cream cheese
Drunken boat billy goat
Trapped in Annette Funnicello
Full of fish and roses and the posies
Squirming, unlearning
Pudding in a cloud of unknowing
Silence, Violence
Pudding in a cloud of unknowing
Quantum Plumbing, the pineal gland
The sixth chakra, the seventh seal
Enveloping pelicans pecking at the crumbs
Of enlightenment
This one' called Martin Scorsese
He makes the best fucking films (x2)
If I ever meet him I'm gonna grab his fuckin' neck and just shake him
And say thank you thank you for makin' such excellwnt fuckin' movies
Then I'd twist his nose all the way the fuck around
And the rip off one of his ears and throw it
Like a like a like a fuckin' frisbee
I wanna chew his fuckin' lips off and grab his head and suck out one of his
eyes and chew on it and spit it out in his face
And thank you thank you for all of your fuckin' films
Then I'd pick him up by the hair swing him over my head a few times
And throw him across the room and kick all his fuckin' teeth in and then
stomp on his face 40 or 50 times
Cuz he makes the best fucking films he makes the best fucking films
I've ever seen in my life
I fuckin love him
Hey hey look at me hey hey i'm phillip glass hey look at me over here hey
hey hey einstein hey get off the beach hey einstein hey hey look hey hey
And so the very evil children took the dog out to play in the park
Then they took him home and refused to set him on fire
They were evil evil evil children
And they refused to do as they were told
They would say, "why should we leave the elderly woman in the expressway?"
"No way, we're not doing it"
Then they would go downstairs and prepeare the molotov cocktails
Knowing full well that when they were finished there was no way in hell they
were going to blow up the neighbor's barn
They were evil evil evil children
Lately, I've seen red, I've tasted blood
I've killed with words, I've wished and hoped
And swam through a river of snot
Twice as wide as the mighty Mississippi
But I wanna know about the commercial I saw on TV
An Irish guy walking through a field of green
Whistling one of those Irish jigs
And a woman walks up and says
"Manly yes, but I like it too"
Then the guy pulls out a huge knife
And cuts off his first two fingers
And somehow catches them
In what's left of his left hand
And hands them to the woman
Did I mention they're both dressed in green?
They, they both sing this song together
"Are ya icky? Are ya sticky?
Are ya hot as anything?
Hey, cut off two of your fingers
And stab yourself in the eye"
Then he stabs himself in the eye
And hands her the knife
And she stabs herself in the eye, okay? Okay?
So what about that?
Then they join arms and do this Irish folk dance
While taking turns dismembering each other
This was a commercial for deodorant, I think
Or soap or something
So now all the body parts are lying in a heap
But the heads are still singing
"Are ya icky? Are ya sticky?
Are ya hot as anything?
Hey, get away from summer
And cut off all your limbs"
Then all of the body parts
Start hopping and bopping around like little bunny rats
Then they jump into the mouths of the singing heads
But then they just slip right back out
Through the severed necks and keep bopping about
It's very beautiful music that's playing
There's an Irish flute and a mandolin, I think
And the background singers sound
Just like the Clancy brothers
It's really a wonderful commercial
Spectacular, it must of cost a fortune to make
The kind of commercial you'd see
During the Super Bowl, maybe
Where the advertising time costs
A million dollars a half a minute
Wow, imagine that
A million dollars for a half a minute
Anyway, by the end of it
It looks like the two of them have been through a juicer
Or a food processor or a blender or something
It's just a pink puree of blood
Bone and flesh in a big bucket
But it's still singing somehow
"Are ya icky? Are ya sticky?
Are ya hot as anything?
Hey, blend yourself, process yourself
Become a glass of animal juice"
"Haven't you had enough
Of fruit juices and vegetable juices?
Next time company comes over
Offer them a cool refreshing glass of yourself"
"Give of yourself
Stop being such a selfish piece of snot
Okay? Okay? Okay
When I drive through the great northwest
The snowcaps on the mountain tops
A pack of wolves surrounds my truck
And my fingertips are so cold
All this beauty and all those wolves
They surround me with their eyes so blue
The mountains high, the wolves I love
And all I see is you
All I see is you
(Chorus)
When I see you
I bleed like a hemophiliac of love
When I see you
I bleed like a hemophiliac of love
I remember the blood I bled
Those wolf-like eyes upon your head
Lover, oh, lover, you tear my flesh
And the wolves are at my throat
And vapor is my breath in the cold Mack truck
Surrounded by the wolves, they're the ones I love
I'll bleed for them like I will bleed for you
The never ending stream of love
The never ending stream of love
(spoken)Okay, and this next one is called "Paper Cut." I-it's not as painful; it's more kinda whiny.(shouted)Ow! Goddamn goddamn goddamn I got a fuck-fucking paper cut! Ow! Ow! I fucking hate paper cuts! Son of a bitch goddamn goddamn goddamn fucking paper cut! Fuck! Ow!
Clinging to the end of time Crawling
stairs, climbing floors Pretend it's
such a desperate situation Falling
leaves of abstinence Listening in
to glistening skin While the
patriarchy bleeds Long
division, indecision Sad
sad sadness in the trees
Stowaways on a stinking
ship Punching out the
eye in the sky
Feeling up the
ferris wheel
Lapping up the
King Missile - Cheesecake Truck