Celebrity Deathmatch (1998)

Actors

• Scott Prendergast (writer)
• Eric Fogel (actor)
• Eric Fogel (writer)
• Mike de Seve (actor)
• Greg Korin (actor)
• Karen Sztajnberg (editor)
• Abby Terkuhle (producer)
• Matt Noce (miscellaneous crew)
• Scott Sonneborn (writer)
• Scottie Ray (actor)
• Carl Paolino (miscellaneous crew)
• Jed Spingarn (writer)
• Kerry Williams (actress)
• Jim Conroy (actor)
• Emily Bauer (actress)

Genres

• Action
• Animation
• Comedy

Quotes:

[each episode's closing line]::Johnny Gomez: Good fight, good night.

[to Ernest Hemingway]::Mankind: You know what the difference between your book and mine is? MINE WEIGHS MORE.::[Clobbers Hemingway with his book]

Mills Lane: Let's get it on.

Mills Lane: All right, young ladies, this is a fight to the death. Now death may not be something you two have thought about, so let me just explain...::Mary-Kate Olsen: [interrupting, to Ashley] I hate you!::Ashley Olsen: I hate you more!::Mary-Kate Olsen: You're stupid!::Ashley Olsen: You're stupider!::Mills Lane: [breaking up the girls' slapping match] Ladies, I haven't even started the fight yet!::Mary-Kate Olsen: She started it!::Ashley Olsen: No, she did!::Mills Lane: [giving up after they try and hit each other] On second thought... just go ahead and get it on!

Anna Kournikova: [about opponent Elizabeth Hurley] Yes, I called her ugly, but I should have called her a pig! I should have called her a hideous, swirly moonie face! I hate her, I hate her! Aaaaaaaaaah!

Cher: [to Bette Midler] Hey, Midler! You got a wide load sign for that ass?

[Axl Rose pulls out a sharp object from under his kilt]::Johnny Gomez: Nick, what the hell is this psycho doing?::[Celtic music played in background]::Nick Diamond: Ancient Scottish soldiers wearing kilts such as Axl's always carried a dagger strapped to their ankle. Tradition has it that once a soldier removes it from its scabbard, he can't put it back without drawing blood... even if it's his own.::Johnny Gomez: It's scissors, Nick.::[Celtic music abruptly stops]::Nick Diamond: Oh... uh, that must be a different tradition.

Alfred Hitchcock: [to Steven Spielberg] Good evening, Steven. Welcome to Alfred Hitchcock Presents... your death.

Debbie Matenopoulos: You may be a reanimated corpse, Stacey, but you don't scare me! I've dealt with bigger stiffs than you!::Stacey Cornbread: Oh yeah? LIKE WHO?::Debbie Matenopoulos: Like Meredith Vieira, THAT'S WHO!

Kudrow, Lisa Filmography

• Neighbors
  2014, role: actress , character name: Carol Gladstone
• El Americano: The Movie
  2014, role: actress , character name: Lucille
• Tales from the Warner Bros. Lot
  2013, role: actress , character name: Herself
• 2012 Writers Guild Awards
  2012, role: actress , character name: Herself - Presenter
• The WIN Awards 2012
  2012, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Arts and the Mind
  2012, role: actress , character name: Herself - Host
• 2012 Primetime Creative Arts Emmys
  2012, role: actress , character name: Herself - Presenter
• Pearl Jam Twenty
  2011, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Web Therapy
  2011, role: writer
• Easy A
  2010, role: actress , character name: Mrs. Griffith
• The Making of Easy A
  2010, role: actress , character name: Herself
• The 1st Annual Streamy Awards
  2009, role: actress , character name: Herself - Presenter
• A Home for Everyone: The Making of 'Hotel for Dogs'
  2009, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Love and Other Impossible Pursuits
  2009, role: producer
• Bandslam
  2009, role: actress , character name: Karen
• Hotel for Dogs
  2009, role: actress , character name: Lois Scudder
• Shooting Blue
  2009, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Powder Blue
  2009, role: actress , character name: Sally
• Paper Man
  2009, role: actress , character name: Claire Dunn
• Love and Other Impossible Pursuits
  2009, role: actress , character name: Carolyn
• Chabad: To Life Telethon
  2008, role: actress , character name: Herself - Video Guest
• Web Therapy
  2008, role: writer
• TV's All-Time Funniest: A Paley Center for Media Special
  2008, role: actress , character name: Herself
• All the Best from Denis Norden
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself
• P.S. I Love You
  2007, role: actress , character name: Denise
• The Film Society of Lincoln Center Annual Gala Tribute to Diane Keaton
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself - Speaker
• Kabluey
  2007, role: actress , character name: Leslie
• The 58th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards
  2006, role: actress , character name: Herself
• 2006 Independent Spirit Awards
  2006, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Happy Endings
  2005, role: actress , character name: Mamie
• The Comeback
  2005, role: writer
• Friends Final Thoughts
  2005, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Deal
  2005, role: producer
• 10th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards
  2004, role: actress , character name: Herself
• My Life, Inc.
  2004, role: producer
• Beck and Call
  2004, role: producer
• Michael Moore, el gran agitador
  2004, role: actress , character name: Crystal
• Wonderland
  2003, role: actress , character name: Sharon Holmes
• Picking Up & Dropping Off
  2003, role: producer
• The 60th Annual Golden Globe Awards
  2003, role: actress , character name: Herself - Audience Member
• The 29th Annual People's Choice Awards
  2003, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Marci X
  2003, role: actress , character name: Marci Feld
• Night of Too Many Stars
  2003, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Analyze That
  2002, role: actress , character name: Laura Sobel
• Bark!
  2002, role: actress , character name: Darla
• The 54th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards
  2002, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Friends: The Stuff You've Never Seen
  2001, role: actress , character name: Herself
• The 27th Annual People's Choice Awards
  2001, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Dr. Dolittle 2
  2001, role: actress , character name: Ava
• All Over the Guy
  2001, role: actress , character name: Marie

Famous quotes by Lisa Kudrow:

"The tragedy, ... is that this woman needs something, and has expectations, that cannot be fully realized. And to keep herself in such an unforgiving environment, she goes back and forth between being really strong, and stupid about what her priorities are."

"Some people aren't sure what to make of it,"

"I always felt like I could be funny, but there was a part of me that always judged actors so harshly... I thought all actors were dumb-that they must have serious emotional problems. Even if they don't, that's the perception I had of them. I didn't want anyone to see me that way."

"Don is interested in real people who are damaged and flawed and not always likable the first minute you meet them, ... Then, getting to know them, you begin to understand them -- that's what he's interested in, and so am I."

"It's challenging to get it to look spontaneous, ... That's tricky to do."

"This isn't possible without you,"

"Before I became an actress, I used to think, 'When I get famous, there's so much love for you. And I think that's what everyone's after with trying to achieve celebrity."

"In college I castrated 21 rats, and I got pretty good at it."

"Phoebe: I may play the fool at times but I'm a little more than just a pretty blonde girl with an ass that won't quit."

"I've learned you can make a mistake and the whole world doesn't end. I had to learn to allow myself to make a mistake without becoming defensive and unforgiving."

"Watching a person lose their dignity used to be uncomfortable, and now it's an expected part of the program that we're becoming comfortable with."

"I actually made an effort to reject acting, to shove it out of my body, because I didn't want my kids to have an actress as a mother-to have, like, a silly person."

"You become a celebrity, not because of your work or what you do, but because you have no privacy."

"Shirley MacLaine said, You're so funny, then gave me a hug. Everything went white. I couldn't hear, I couldn't see. I thought I was going to pass out."

"I've been careful to keep my life separate because it's important to me to have privacy and for my life not to be a marketing device for a movie or a TV show. I'm worth more than that."

"Since I had the baby I can't tolerate anything violent or sad, I saw the Matrix and I had my eyes closed through a lot of it, though I didn't need to. I would peek, and then think, oh OK, I can see that."

"I'm the youngest in my family, and everyone is very funny, and I was always trying to keep up with them. I just loved making people laugh."

"I'd played dumbasses a lot. On Mad About You, I played a very dumb waitress and they saw me."

"My hair got lighter, and I gradually went blonde. I liked it. Had more fun. But my image of myself in my head is this dark-haired person."

"I found the right man, got married, and just had to keep not reinventing myself, just deciding that it doesn't matter what you are if you are a good person."