Conquer your world.
Plot
In the small town of San Dimas, a few miles away from Los Angeles, there are two nearly brain dead teenage boys going by the names of Bill S, Preston ESQ. and Ted Theodore Logan, they have a dream together of starting their own rock and roll band called the "Wyld Stallyns". Unfortunately, they are still in high school and on the verge of failing out of their school as well, and if they do not pass their upcoming history report, they will be separated as a result of Ted's father sending him to military school. But, what Bill and Ted do not know is that they must stay together to save the future. So, a man from the future named Rufus came to help them pass their report. So, both Bill and Ted decided to gather up historical figures which they need for their report. They are hoping that this will help them pass their report so they can stay together.
Keywords: 1,000,000-b.c., 1200s, 13th-century, 1420s, 1480s, 15th-century, 1800s, 1810s, 1860s, 1870s
History is about to be rewritten by two guys who can't spell...
Time flies when you're having fun.
Party on, dudes!
Brace yourself amigos for a most triumphant video! (UK VHS Box)
The funniest comedy in the history of history.
Bill: Do you know where there are any personages of historical significance around here?
Girl at Mall: Oh, my God!::[laughs with her friend at Freud's introduction]::Sigmund Freud: You both seem to be suffering from a mild form of hysteria.::Girl at Mall: You are such a geek!::[walks off with her friend]::Billy the Kid: Way to go, egghead!::Socrates: GEEK!::[laughs]::Sigmund Freud: What is a geek?
Bill: [responding to Freud's invitation to examine him] Nah. Just got a minor Oedipal complex.
Ted: Now your dad's going for it in your own room!::Bill: Shut up, Ted.::Ted: Your stepmom *is* cute, though.::Bill: Shut up, Ted!::Ted: Remember when I asked her to the prom?::Bill: SHUT UP, TED!
Bill, Ted: Excellent.
[as Genghis Khan shows off, Bill narrates]::Bill: As you can see, Genghis very much enjoys Twinkies because of the excellent sugar rush.
Bill: It is indeed a pleasure to introduce to you a gentleman we picked up in medieval Mongolia in the year 1269.::Ted: Please welcome, the very excellent barbarian...::Ted, Bill: ...MR. GENGHIS KHAN!::[All the students applaud wildly for Khan]::Ted: This is a dude who, 700 years ago, totally ravaged China, and who, we were told, 2 hours ago, totally ravaged Oshman's Sporting Goods.
[Delivering a history report]::Ox: Everything is different, but the same... things are more moderner than before... bigger, and yet smaller... it's computers... San Dimas High School football rules.
[Bill and Ted are working on their history report]::Bill: Okay, Ted, George Washington. One: the father of our country.::Ted: Two: born on President's Day.::Bill: Three: the dollar-bill guy.::Ted: Bill, you ever made a mushroom out of his head? It's like, just like...::Bill: Ted. Alaska.::Ted: Okay. Um... Had wooden teeth, chased Moby Dick.::Bill: That's Captain Ahab, dude.
[an early morning jam]::Bill: I'm Bill S. Preston, Esquire!::Ted: And I'm Ted Theo- [realizes *he's* holding the camera] Hold on. Bill, here. You take it.::Bill: Okay.::Ted: And I'm Ted "Theodore" Logan!::[Bill puts the camera on the table]::Bill, Ted: And we're... WYLD STALLYNS!
Plot
Eddie and his family have just inherited a spooky wreck of a house. What they do not know about the house is that it was built over an evil passage way, but they are soon to discover the wacky evil it releases.
Keywords: basement, brother-sister-relationship, family-relationships, female-vampire, friday-the-13th-spoof, haunting, horror-spoof, house, independent-film, inheritance
One HELL of a party!
WARNING: This movie starts where the others chicken out!
Plot
Genghis Khan and his Mongol army invade Poland and lay siege to the city of Cracow. The Polish king tries to make peace in order to save his city, and Genghis Khan seems amenable to that. However, his son Ogotai is itching for war, and his mistress eggs him on to defy his father and take the city.
Keywords: army, independent-film, mongol, whipping
A Savage Era Explodes On The Screen!
Plot
In 1220, a small band of English crusaders arrives at Samarkand in Central Asia, just as the city and its ruling princess are threatened by the hordes of Genghis Khan. Lovely Princess Shalimar hopes to thwart the conqueror by guile, while Sir Guy wants to put up a brave (if ultimately hopeless) fight. Despite a mutual attraction, their conflicting projects threaten any hope of success either might have had alone. Fast-moving; bears little relation to history.
Keywords: 1200s, barbarian, genghis-khan, princess
Plot
Temujin, who later became Genghis Khan is wise, or sometimes cunning. He goes through several heroic episodes; competing at the Man of Men contest, falling in love with the enemy commander's daughter, and struggling to restore his demolished hometown. Meanwhile his steps guide him to be a great conqueror. Khan's witty, humorous side in his adolescent years before he takes the throne.
Keywords: character-name-in-title, genghis-khan
Genghis Khan is a 1965 film depicting the life and conquests of the Mongol emperor Genghis Khan. It was released in the United Kingdom and the United States in 1965 by Columbia Pictures, and was directed by Henry Levin, and starred Omar Sharif, who that same year starred in another epic, Doctor Zhivago. The film also starred James Mason, Stephen Boyd, Robert Morley, Françoise Dorléac, and Telly Savalas. A 70 mm version of the film was released by CCC Film in West Germany. It was filmed in Yugoslavia.
Genghis Khan (/ˈɡɛŋɡɪs ˈkɑːn/ or /ˈdʒɛŋɡɪs ˈkɑːn/,Mongol: [tʃiŋɡɪs xaːŋ] ( listen); 1162? – August 1227), born Temujin, was the founder and Great Khan (emperor) of the Mongol Empire, which became the largest contiguous empire in history after his death.
He came to power by uniting many of the nomadic tribes of northeast Asia. After founding the Mongol Empire and being proclaimed "Genghis Khan", he started the Mongol invasions that resulted in the conquest of most of Eurasia. These included raids or invasions of the Kara-Khitan Khanate, Caucasus, Khwarezmid Empire, Western Xia and Jin dynasties. These campaigns were often accompanied by wholesale massacres of the civilian populations – especially in Khwarezmia. By the end of his life, the Mongol Empire occupied a substantial portion of Central Asia and China.
Before Genghis Khan died, he assigned Ögedei Khan as his successor and split his empire into khanates among his sons and grandsons. He died in 1227 after defeating the Western Xia. He was buried in an unmarked grave somewhere in Mongolia at an unknown location. His descendants went on to stretch the Mongol Empire across most of Eurasia by conquering or creating vassal states out of all of modern-day China, Korea, the Caucasus, Central Asian countries, and substantial portions of modern Eastern Europe, Russia and the Middle East. Many of these invasions resulted in the large-scale slaughter of local populations, which have given Genghis Khan and his empire a fearsome reputation in local histories.
Yo, your mother, your father and you brother, no your sister. ole ole, ole ole
Baby, go go go go come on eveybody sing with me oups I did it again!!! hit me
Baby three mores tim and who let’s the dog out!!!! hey, lai ho mar, ngo ho mar
Ohhh, tieu cay lei loy moy!!! ni hoa...
He was just a gentile man
It was his love to grind
He didn't know the fear
He never had to hide
He loved the glance of metal
And the smell of blood
The flame of badness burned inside him
That was the only thing he had got
Genghis Khan
Can't you see it's all a lie
The time had it made
He was a man like you and me
His era was his fate
He freed his conquered land
From the ban of death
Freedom to the mongolenation
By fanning their wrath
You about to witness a two five Jedi Minds collabo
You know what I mean? To God Jus Allah
Megatraum is a Martian, feeding off weed and cash
I dash from my ship in the Roswell Crash
You smash when you dash with the clashing ox
Saw you in half without a fucking magical box
Wet pussy always seems to splash my cock
I'm dead, they just didn't leave the casket locked
Pass my block I let shots drill in your spleen
We're ill marines with hand held killing machines
Steal dreams with the armored steel guard your grill
Nigga, I was brought up by the Kents in Smallville
Following Allah's will, horror in the skill
Caught up in the real, don't give me cause to kill
Nocturnal, I stroll where the darkness goes
If I had to follow the moon across the globe
With the staff and white robe, I still hold metal
Disciples who walk on glass and rose petals
Yo, last rites, we fast to blast twice
Jedi Mind 252, we mad nice
We smash mics and blast too precise
Fast 40 days and pray for 40 nights
Yo, yo, I'm savage, I write rhymes in pitch blackness
Any motherfucker that front, is left backless
Y'all motherfuckers just burn into ashes
Trying to step into the zone where Vinnie Paz is
It's Black Sabbath, put a slug in his grill
'Cause Jedi Mind two five thuggin' for real
You ever think there might be trouble then peel
'Cause a motherfucker like me dumpin' to kill
Y'all better pass the mic 'cause Vin's ill
Y'all learn the facts of life from Kim Fields
I don't know how many kids my flow harms
My gun control leave y'all with no arms
Y'all love to smell the stench of dead bodies
Left in the path of the Paz and Khadafi
5, 9 tatted up, mad stocky
Animal thug who bust slugs in the lobby
Yo, last rites, we fast to blast twice
Jedi Mind 252 we mad nice
We smash mics and blast too precise
Fast 40 days and pray for 40 nights
Yo, last rites, we fast to blast twice
Jedi Mind 252 we mad nice
We smash mics and blast too precise
Fast 40 days and pray for 40 nights
I hit the turnpike on dirt bikes with 2 heaters
On my way to Philly to fight for Mumia
Only thug guerrillas will react to this
The laws try to destroy black activist
Half of y'all is performers and actresses
I keep at least a 100 grand in the mattresses
Shit so hot, soon as I write it I get indicted
I dare one y'all scared niggas to bite it
I stood in hood lobbies getting my rocks off
With long johns and 3 pairs of socks on
Ducking from the pigs so I don't get knocked off
Or popped off and y'all thugs are soft
It's like you're skirt get pulled up, clothes come off
Red Dragons, can't even fuck with my brain patterns
I'm all live, Pentium Plus and Benz wagons
Mahdi, believe me it do ring bells
If you saw me do dirt you won't live to tell
I've done lived in a cell, did bids in hell
Held niggas at gunpoint for ransom and bail
Yo, last rites, we fast to blast twice
Jedi Mind 252 we mad nice
We smash mics and blast too precise
I have come to lie with you
I have come to die with you
On your padded shoulder
And your golden chest
In a wilderness of glass we rest
And all the flowers they are our words
And my chances follow dances
Into a storm afraid
A sweet and bitter rest he gets
A sweet and bitter rest he gets
I have come to lie with you
So long, Genghis Khan
Now you're gone, so long
So long, Genghis Khan
Now you're gone, so hold on
Now you're gone, so hold on
So long, Genghis Khan
Now you're gone, so hold on
Genghis!
When I was young they murdered my father
He was betrayed and drank the poison
My mother was raped and killed in the vilage
Destroy into ruins they came to pillage
It is done ‒ born of fire
I've become ‒ warrior son
What's done is done ‒ soul avenger
I've become ‒ the chosen one
I was captured and I became a slave
The old prophet saw me and game my name
'Genhis Khan' he screamed at the sky
He say my future, my vengence will rise
It is done ‒ born of fire
I've become ‒ warrior son
What's done is done ‒ soul avenger
I've become ‒ the chosen one
Kill for kill ‒ his blood I will spill
Kill for kill ‒ I kill for the thrill
Kill for kill ‒ I vengeance the few
Kill for kill ‒ His blood I will feel
In Mongol country I ride with my brothers
I'm getting closer the hour
And now my sword I hold on your throat
Remember my father as I spill your blood
It is done ‒ born of fire
I've become ‒ warrior son
What's done is done ‒ soul avenger
They rode the fastest horses
left the wind behind
thousand men
and one man led the way
the others followed blind
Genghis Khan.
They galloped over mountains and desert sands
they carried desolation throughout the land
and nothing there could stop them in this world.
Geng
Geng
Genghis Khan
hey rider
ho rider
go rider let us follow
Geng
Geng
Genghis Khan
go brother
drink brother
dance brother
hear us holler
you can hearhis laughter ho ho ho ho
now and ever after ha ha ha ha
when he drinks his jug up at one draught.
He was the greatest lover and the strongest man
of his day
and we have heard that all the women fell for him
so they say
and he bred seven child in one long night
he had his foes a-running at his very sight
and nothing that could stop him in this world.
Geng
Geng
Genghis Khan
ove you more