Iron Man Three (2013)

Actors

• Kevin Arnold (actor)
• Linden Ashby (actor)
• Ric Bagoly (actor)
• Sala Baker (actor)
• Logan Bennett (actor)
• Paul Bettany (actor)
• Juan Bofill (actor)
• Rustam Branaman (actor)
• Nick Brandon (actor)
• Dan Brown (actor)
• David Anthony Buglione (actor)
• Kial Butler (actor)
• Nate Bynum (actor)
• Don Cheadle (actor)
• Toochukwu T.C. Anyachonkeya (actor)

Genres

• Action
• Adventure
• Fantasy
• Sci-Fi

Taglines:

Prepare for heavy metal!
Unleash the power behind the armor.
Even heroes fall.

Quotes:

The Mandarin: Some people call me a terrorist. I consider myself a teacher. America. Ready for another lesson?::The Mandarin: In 1864, in Sand Creek, Colorado, the U.S. Military waited until the friendly Cheyenne Braves had all gone hunting. Waited to attack and slaughter the families left behind. And claim their land.::The Mandarin: Thirty-nine hours ago, the Ali al-Salam Air Base in Kuwait was attacked. I, I, I did that. A quaint military church, filled with wives and children, of course. The soldiers were out on maneuvers. The 'Braves' were away.::The Mandarin: President Ellis, you continue to resist my attempts to educate you, sir. And now, you've missed me again.::The Mandarin: You don't know who I am. You don't know where I am. And you'll NEVER see me coming.

Operator: Stark Secure Server: now transferring to all known receivers.::Tony Stark: Pepper, it's me. I've got a lot of apologies to make and not a lot of time, so... first off. I'm so sorry I put you in harm's way. That was selfish and stupid and it won't happen again. Also, it's Christmas time. The rabbit's too big. Done. Sorry. And I'm sorry in advance because... I can't come home yet.::[pauses]::Tony Stark: I need to find this guy. You gotta stay safe. That's all I know. I just stole a poncho from a wooden Indian.

[from trailer]::Tony Stark: I'm Tony Stark. I build neat stuff, got a great girl, occasionally save the world. So why can't I sleep?

[from trailer]::Tony Stark: [to Pepper] Things are different now, I have to protect the one thing that I can't live without. That's you.

[from trailer]::The Mandarin: Mr Stark, today is the first day of what's left of your life.

[Stark approaches his car, flanked by news reporter. One videographer behind him points his smartphone at him]::Videographer: Hey Mr. Stark. When is somebody going to kill this guy? Just sayin'.::[Stark turns around to face the videographer]::Tony Stark: Is that what you want?::[pauses]::Tony Stark: Here's a little Holiday greeting I've been wanting to send to the Mandarin. I just didn't know how to phrase it until now. My name is Tony Stark and I'm not afraid of you. I know you're a coward, so I decided... that you just died, pal. I'm gonna come get the body. There's no politics here, it's just good old-fashioned revenge. There's no Pentagon. It's just you and me. And on the off-chance you're a man, here's my home address: 10880 Malibu Point, 90265. I'll leave the door unlocked. That's what you wanted, right?::[Stark grabs the smartphone and throws it against a column before entering his car]::Tony Stark: Bill me.

[from trailer]::Aldrich Killian: The whole world's gonna be watching.

[from trailer]::The Mandarin: I'm gonna offer the choice: do you want an empty life, or a meaningful death?

President Ellis: You elected me on a single platform. I will defend this country at all costs. The Mandarin must be stopped!

[from TV spot]::Tony Stark: [suits up] You know, it's moments like these when I realize how much of a superhero I am.::Pepper Potts: Wow!

Romancing the Joan (2013)

Actors

• Dominic Adams (actor)
• Cleo Anthony (actor)
• Philip V. Bruenn (actor)
• Tony Cicchetti (actor)
• Joseph Dixon (actor)
• Mitch Eakins (actor)
• Michael Foster (actor)
• Jeremy Olson (actor)
• Tim Parrish (actor)
• George Snarberg (actor)
• Benz Veal (actor)
• Jesse Wilson (actor)
• Jason Zahodnik (actor)
• Joan Rivers (actress)
• Melissa Rivers (actress)

Genres

• Comedy

Taglines:

Love just got a rude awakening.

The Vigilante (2010)

Actors

• Christopher Bachlandsherin (actor)
• Scott Carnwath (actor)
• Bobby Chua (actor)
• Joyce Lee Chung (actor)
• Geryh 'Hurricane' Curtis (actor)
• Gene L. Daniels (actor)
• Hedo Davis (actor)
• Rene Delacruz (actor)
• Joe Estevez (actor)
• Brandon J. Gibson (actor)
• Jacob Hall (actor)
• Nick Hendry (actor)
• Val Hovanesian (actor)
• Austin Hoyle (actor)
• Bill Allen (actor)

Genres

• Action
• Drama

Chez Joan (2009)

Actors

• Kevin Deon (actor)
• Nathaniel Dutson (actor)
• Arthur Loring (actor)
• Beverly Morgan (actor)
• Lynn Ross (actor)
• Mario Rossello (actor)
• William Fern Shaw (actor)
• Alan C. Simpson (actor)
• Jim Waters (actor)
• Kelly Hunt (actress)
• Beverly Morgan (actress)
• Kevin Deon (producer)
• Kelly Hunt (producer)
• Jim Waters (producer)
• Kevin Deon (writer)

Genres

• Comedy
• Short

Taglines:

Washed up celebrity dip list.

Titans of Justice (2006)

Actors

• Tom Hodges (actor)
• Ron Jeremy (actor)
• Brooke Dillman (actress)
• Sally Rundgren (actress)
• Tom Hodges (producer)
• James Charles Leary (producer)
• Michael R. Meredith (producer)
• Kirk Pynchon (producer)
• James Charles Leary (writer)
• Michael R. Meredith (writer)
• Kirk Pynchon (writer)
• Tom Hodges (director)

Genres

• Animation

Taglines:

A full load of justice, right in your face!

Queer Duck: The Movie (2006)

Actors

• Jeff Bennett (actor)
• Jim J. Bullock (actor)
• Kevin Chamberlin (actor)
• Chris Cox (actor)
• Tim Curry (actor)
• Andy Dick (actor)
• Andy Dick (actor)
• David Duchovny (actor)
• Mark Hamill (actor)
• Howard Hoffman (actor)
• Nick Jameson (actor)
• Maurice LaMarche (actor)
• Maurice LaMarche (actor)
• Maurice LaMarche (actor)
• Jeff Bennett (actor)

Genres

• Animation
• Comedy

Taglines:

He can't even fly straight!

Quotes:

Queer Duck: Well, if you're mixing drinks, I'd like a slow comfortable screw up against the wall of a bus station in Passaic, New Jersey.::Queer Duck: It's just rum.

Queer Duck: [in a dream sequence about when they're old and still together] Openly Gator. Where the hell is my dinner?::Openly Gator: Oh, here!::Queer Duck: [screams when he sees a dead rat on the plate] Why do we keep ordering from that Thai place?

Queer Duck: We have an awful future ahead of us.::Openly Gator: What are you saying? Have you met someone else?::Queer Duck: No! No, no, no, no, no!::Lola Buzzard: [suddenly grabs him and pulls his head to her chest] Darling!::Queer Duck: Well, kind of.

Queer Duck: [tied to a beam] You know, for a heterosexual, you tie really good knots.::Reverend Vandergelding: [flattered] aww, you!

Reverend Vandergelding: [after forcing Queer Duck to drink a potion that will turn him straight] Could it be? What do you think of Cameron Diaz?::Queer Duck: [in a masculine voice] She's hot.::Reverend Vandergelding: Camryn Manheim?::Queer Duck: She's hot.::Reverend Vandergelding: Sister Wendy? [shows a picture of an ugly old nun]::Queer Duck: [scratches his chin] I'd do her.::Reverend Vandergelding: SUCCESS!

Reverend Vandergelding: So, how did you finally tell them you were gay?::Queer Duck: Oh, well, that's an interesting story. It all goes back to those crazy, turbulent, fabulous seventies... [music starts]::Reverend Vandergelding: Wait a minute... [music stops] Is this going to be a musical number? I'm mean, what is it with you people and musical numbers?::Queer Duck: Just sit back and enjoy it!

Lola Buzzard: [after getting a Jellyfish off her] What do you think of my new look?::Queer Duck: You look like The Joker.::Lola Buzzard: I was going for it. Quick, say something to make me frown again.::Queer Duck: Bush is running for a third term.::Lola Buzzard: Christ! The country's ruined.

Openly Gator: We need some sort of superpowers to help save Queer Duck. Do you guys have any?::Rosie O'Donnell: I can honestly say I haven't.::Openly Gator: Me neither.::Bi-Polar Bear: I have one. I can crack a walnut with my butt.::[both Openly Gator and Oscar Wildcat are left speechless, so is Peccary]

Openly Gator: You can't change who you are!::Queer Duck: Well, sometimes I wish I could. Don't you?::Openly Gator: No. I am a gay man, like my father and his father before him. Now get some sleep.

Queer Duck: [while being forced to drink a potion] No, stop! Tastes like Snapple! God, I wish I had my gag reflex back!

Not Only But Always (2004)

Actors

• David Aston (actor)
• Timothy Balme (actor)
• Owen Black (actor)
• Jon Brazier (actor)
• Alistair Browning (actor)
• Clive Bull (actor)
• Andy Conlan (actor)
• Alan Cox (actor)
• Glen Drake (actor)
• Richard Durden (actor)
• Peter Feeney (actor)
• Ewen Gilmour (actor)
• John Glass (actor)
• Rhys Ifans (actor)
• Jonathan Aris (actor)

Genres

• Biography
• Drama

Quotes:

[Peter discovers Dudley shagging a young woman in his dressing room when he should be getting ready to go on stage]::Peter Cook: If you *do* decide to come on stage, Dudley, make sure you take her off your penis first.

Dudley Moore: Is my entire contribution to this show going to consist of my humiliating myself?::Peter Cook: No, Dudley. We'll do that for you.::Dudley Moore: Thank you. I wouldn't want to be appreciated or anything.::Peter Cook: Well, we initially tried looking up to you, Dudley... but when we did, we invariably found ourselves looking down.

Eleanor Bron: Sorry, sir. The club's full.::Upper Class Man: But I have an invitation. Do you know who I am?::Peter Cook: [to the people in the queue] Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen. May I have everyone's attention for a moment? This gentleman doesn't seem to know who he is. If anyone here recognises this man, can you come to the front of the queue and tell him his name.::Upper Class Man: Fuck you!::Peter Cook: You'll have to queue for that, too, I'm afraid, sir. There's a £5 waiting list.

Dudley Moore: Why do you constantly belittle me?::Peter Cook: Dudley, I don't think it's possible to belittle a club-footed dwarf whose only talent is to play Chopsticks in the style of Debussy.

Wendy Snowden: Everything happens for a purpose. Go with the flow.::Peter Cook: I've enjoyed the plughole immensely. I can't wait for the drain.::Wendy Snowden: It's really weird that this has happened when it has. I'm pregnant.::Dudley Moore: I think that was the U-bend, Pete.

Dudley Moore: You have a generous heart.::Peter Cook: I do have a generous heart. I have a very generous heart. I recently caught it trying to give my liver to a wino.

Dudley Moore: Are you allergic to compassion?::Peter Cook: Only in suppository form.

[about to give a tribute to Dudley Moore on "This Is Your Life"]::Alan Bennett: They wanted a glowing accolade. But I said "No. I'll do an amusing anecdote" - because glowing accolades tend to sound so insincere.::Peter Cook: ...Especially when they are.

Peter Cook: The BBC want another series.::Dudley Moore: Oh good. I'll make it up, you write it down, take all the money, take all the credit, then turn up drunk, and I'll make it all up again.

[1978: sketch prompted by the recent death of Pope John Paul I]::Peter Cook: Hello, mother.::Dudley Moore: [falsetto] Hello, son.::Peter Cook: Did you go to the Pope's funeral?::Dudley Moore: [falsetto] Yeah, I did. It was lovely.::Peter Cook: The way they laid out the Pope was beautiful.::Dudley Moore: [falsetto] Oh yes, son.::Peter Cook: Looking at that dead Pope gave me the horn.::Dudley Moore: [falsetto, shocked] No!::Peter Cook: Yeah, I got so horny seeing him lying in state, I had to have a wank.::Dudley Moore: [corpses]::Peter Cook: Yeah. I came all over the Pope - right across his face.::Dudley Moore: [corpses]

Shrek 2 (2004)

Actors

• Guillaume Aretos (actor)
• Kelly Asbury (actor)
• Kelly Asbury (actor)
• Kelly Asbury (actor)
• Kelly Asbury (actor)
• Antonio Banderas (actor)
• Cody Cameron (actor)
• Cody Cameron (actor)
• John Cleese (actor)
• Rupert Everett (actor)
• Larry King (actor)
• Christopher Knights (actor)
• Chris Miller (actor)
• Chris Miller (actor)
• Andrew Adamson (actor)

Genres

• Adventure
• Animation
• Comedy
• Family
• Fantasy

Taglines:

In summer 2004, they're back for more....
Once upon another time...
Not so far, far away...

Quotes:

Fairy Godmother: Remember, happiness is just a teardrop away...

Shrek: So, Fiona's father paid you to do this?::Puss-in-Boots: Oh, the rich king? Sí.

[Puss is watching Shrek and Fiona]::Puss-in-Boots: Whatever happens... I must not cry. You cannot make me cry... [breaks down sobbing]

Princess Fiona: Is that glitter on your lips?::Prince Charming: Mmm, cherry flavored. Want a taste?

[first lines]::Prince Charming: Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far away, the king and queen were blessed with a beautiful baby girl, and throughout the land everyone was happy, until the sun went down, and they saw that their daughter was cursed with a frightful enchantment that took hold each and every night. Desperate, they sought the help of a fairy godmother, who had them lock the young princess away in a tower, there to await the kiss of the handsome Prince Charming. It was he who would chance the perilous journey through blistering cold and scorching desert, traveling for many days and nights, risking life and limb to reach the dragon's keep, for he was the bravest, and most handsome in all the land, and it was destiny that his kiss would break the dreaded curse. He alone would climb to the highest room of the tallest tower to enter the princess's chambers, cross the room to her sleeping silhouette, pull back the gossamer curtains to find her- gasp!::Wolf: What?::Prince Charming: Princess... Fiona?::Wolf: NO!::Prince Charming: Oh, thank heavens! Where is she?::Wolf: She's on her honeymoon.::Prince Charming: Honeymoon? With whom?

Shrek: The kingdom of FAR FAR Away, Donkey? That's where we're going! FAR! FAR!... away.

Puss-in-Boots: I hate Mondays.

[to Donkey, when Shrek, Donkey, and Puss are at a bar]::The Ugly Stepsister: Why the long face?

Donkey: Oh, Shrek. Don't worry. Things just seem bad because it's dark and rainy and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you.

Puss-in-Boots: Stop, ogre! I have misjudged you.::Shrek: Join the club. We got jackets.

Serial Mom (1994)

Actors

• John Badila (actor)
• Chad Bankerd (actor)
• Nat Benchley (actor)
• Stan Brandorff (actor)
• Kyf Brewer (actor)
• Anthony 'Chip' Brienza (actor)
• Jordan Brown (actor)
• Peter Bucossi (actor)
• Tim Caggiano (actor)
• Greg Coale (actor)
• John Calvin Doyle (actor)
• Mojo Gentry (actor)
• Jeffrey Pratt Gordon (actor)
• Lonnie Horsey (actor)
• Johnny Alonso (actor)

Genres

• Comedy
• Crime
• Thriller

Taglines:

She's a fabulous, loving, caring mother, who er... ...happens to be a serial killer!
Every Mom Wants to Be Wanted, But Not For Murder One!
At least she meant well

Quotes:

Chip Sutphin: Did you bring back "Ghost Dad"?::Emma Lou Jenson: There ya go [handing over video] I just love Bill Cosby pictures!

Beverly: Wear your seatbelt! [stabs at Scott's car]

Birdie: [to Beverly] You know, you're bigger than Freddy and Jason now, only you're a real person.

Birdie: [to Misty] Hey, can I borrow your mother? My Aunt is coming for dinner and she's always getting on my nerves.

Beverly: [as Beverly hits Mrs. Jenson a final time] REWIND!

Misty Sutphin: [upset after learning her mother may be a serial killer] Now I'll never get a boyfriend!

Beverly: Buckle up, Scotty! [uses aerosal can and lighter to create flame thrower]::Scotty Barnhill: [screams on fire] No Mrs. Sutphin, please. I'll wear my seatbelt.

Beverly: Mrs. Hinkle, are you insane?::Dottie Hinkle: No I'm not, you motherfucker!

Beverly Sutphin: Are those pussywillows?::Rosemary Ackerman: Dried ones. Aren't they pretty?::Dottie Hinkle: What did you just say?::Beverly Sutphin: [in the stalker voice] Pussywillows, Dottie!

Beverly: Officer, I'm sorry, but we don't allow gum in this house.::Detective Gracey: Sorry, ma'am.

Malta Story (1953)

Actors

• Derek Aylward (actor)
• Ivor Barnard (actor)
• Peter Bull (actor)
• Hugh Burden (actor)
• Stuart Burge (actor)
• Edward Chaffers (actor)
• Michael Craig (actor)
• Maurice Denham (actor)
• Jerry Desmonde (actor)
• Alec Guinness (actor)
• Jack Hawkins (actor)
• Thomas Heathcote (actor)
• Gordon Jackson (actor)
• Geoffrey Keen (actor)
• Ronald Adam (actor)

Genres

• Drama
• History
• War

Taglines:

NOW ! Another Great Performance in the ALEC GUINNESS Hall of Fame ! ...

Rivers, Joan Filmography

• Scatter My Ashes at Bergdorf's
  2013, role: actress , character name: Herself
• 2013 Do Something Awards
  2013, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Why We Laugh: Funny Women
  2013, role: producer
• Romancing the Joan
  2013, role: actress , character name: Joan Rivers
• Moms Mabley: I Got Somethin' to Tell You
  2013, role: actress , character name: Herself
• In Bed with Joan
  2013, role: writer
• Iron Man Three
  2013, role: actress , character name: Joan Rivers
• Why We Laugh: Funny Women
  2013, role: actress , character name: Herself
• In Bed with Joan
  2013, role: producer
• Super Bowl's Greatest Commercials 2012
  2012, role: actress , character name: Go Daddy Girl
• Joan Rivers: Don't Start with Me
  2012, role: producer
• Joan Rivers: Don't Start with Me
  2012, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Vanilla Ice Archive
  2012, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Growing Up Barnard
  2011, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Tower Heist
  2011, role: actress , character name: Herself
• 16th Annual Critics' Choice Movie Awards
  2011, role: actress , character name: Herself - Presenter
• Miss Representation
  2011, role: actress , character name: Herself
• The Smurfs
  2011, role: actress , character name: Party Guest
• Bob Ross: The Happy Painter
  2011, role: actress , character name: Herself
• TMI with Joan Rivers
  2011, role: actress , character name: Herself
• The Undefeated
  2011, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Never Sleep Again: The Elm Street Legacy
  2010, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Working with Lucy: A Conversation with James E. Brodhead
  2010, role: actress , character name: Clips from 'Here's Lucy'
• Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work
  2010, role: actress , character name: Herself
• VH1 News Presents: Plastic Surgery Obsession
  2010, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade
  2010, role: actress , character name: Herself
• The Battle for Late Night
  2010, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps
  2010, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Drop Dead Diva
  2009, role: actress
• What's the Name of the Dame?
  2009, role: actress
• Comedy Central Roast of Joan Rivers
  2009, role: actress , character name: Herself - Roastee
• Every Little Step
  2008, role: actress , character name: Herself
• 11th Annual the Kennedy Center Mark Twain Prize for American Humor: George Carlin
  2008, role: actress , character name: Herself
• The 6th Annual TV Land Awards
  2008, role: actress , character name: Herself
• The Last Guy on Earth
  2008, role: actress
• Making Trouble
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Joan & Melissa: Live at the Academy Awards
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Mr. Warmth: The Don Rickles Project
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Joan & Melissa: Live at the Golden Globe Awards
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself - Host
• Queens of Disco
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Joan & Melissa: Live at the Grammy Awards
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself - Host
• The 100 Greatest Sex Symbols
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself
• The Royal Variety Performance 2007
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Golden Globes Fashion Wrap with Joan and Melissa
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself
• 100 Greatest Stand-Ups
  2007, role: actress , character name: Herself
• An Audience with Joan Rivers
  2006, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Straight Talk
  2006, role: actress , character name: Herself - Host
• Emmy Awards Fashion Wrap with Joan and Melissa
  2006, role: actress , character name: Herself
• The Electric Company's Greatest Hits & Bits
  2006, role: actress , character name: Herself
• Joan Rivers: Before Melissa Pulls the Plug
  2006, role: actress , character name: Herself

Famous quotes by Joan Rivers:

"Don't follow any advice, no matter how good, until you feel as deeply in your spirit as you think in your mind that the counsel is wise."

"The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it."

"My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on."

"It's been so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up whom."

"You make the beds, you wash the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again"

"I don't excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor."

"A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp."

"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call it the present."

"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath.' For three years my husband and I slept in bunk beds."

"Anger is a symptom, a way of cloaking and expressing feelings too awful to experience directly - hurt, bitterness, grief, and, most of all, fear"

"Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory."

"I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking."

"I have a wonderful psychiatrist that I see maybe once a year, because I don't need it. It all comes out onstage."

"People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made."

"I think any celebrity that adopts a child from a third world country is a fool."

"I could be the Greta Garbo of comedy, very secluded, but Garbo had a man who was beyond rich to support her."

"Yeah, I read history. But it doesn't make you nice. Hitler read history, too."

"Both of my parents got to see me host Carson, thank God. That's all anyone wants: to have their parents see they're going to be all right in life."

"It's so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up who."

"My husband wanted to be cremated. I told him I'd scatter his ashes at Neiman Marcus - that way, I'd visit him every day."