Star reveals its in-depth political knowledge

Just to prove there is something other than made-up reality TV and sleb stories in the Daily Star comes a made-up political story. It appears to have taken its lead from the unashamed Tory supporting Express, its sister paper. So the story Prime Minister's Cabinet reshuffle 'puzzles' voters tells us:

Defiant Gordon Brown unveiled his new-look Cabinet yesterday – but left voters clueless over who many of them are...to many ordinary Brits weary of the leadership saga, it was a sea of unknown faces around the famous Cabinet table in 10 Downing Street.

Cabinets are supposed to be crammed full of big-hitting politicians the public are familiar with.

But many of Mr Brown’s team have been hastily promoted, leaving voters asking: “Who are these people?”

And the evidence for what the public thinks? Well, it doesn't actually mention where this comes from. It is entirely possible that such a poll does exist, but the failure to name is source is immediately suspicious. If there is a poll, it's probably done in the Star newsroom.

Because, as the BBC's Chief Political Correspondent James Landale pointed out on the day of the reshuffle:

It's been a mini-reshuffle. Over half of the cabinet are in the same jobs. There are only six new entrants. It's not a substantial injection of new blood.

So how does the Star decide it's 'a sea of unknown faces'? Probably because they have been so busy watching Big Brother and I'm a Celebrity over the last few years that they don't have a clue about politics.

And to prove it: their 'humourous' 'alternative' Cabinet, which suggests Simon Cowell as PM and Lucy Pinder at International Development because

'this glamour girl, 25, would be a great at making sure the international community developed an interest in the breast of British'.

See what they did there? Brilliant.

Will the Star write any old made up shit and stick it on the front page?

Yesterday I noted how the Daily Star had a misleading headline on its front page (again!) for what was possibly one of the thinnest stories that's made a front page for a long time. Well it's two in two days.

Talent Sue: The Movie reheats the idea of a movie of Susan Boyle's life. But it goes further.

It puts a pic of Angelina Jolie next to one of Susan.

The sub-head declares 'Angelina Jolie is up for the lead role!'

The first paragraph categorically states 'Angelia [sic] Jolie among big names lined up to play her.'

Anyone with any wit would already realise this is bollocks. But read further (as a clue, the continuation is on page 10...) and the clearly shameless journo Katie Begley writes:

Here are a few suggestions, some of them cheeky, of those the Daily Star thinks would be perfect for the role.

And it goes on to list Miriam Margolyes, Kathy Bates and Angelina Jolie.

So the Daily Star had a quick poll of their 'newsroom' and came up with the list which they then report as a factual front page news story. For a film that doesn't actually exist.

Truly, truly, pathetic.