(Edited because this blog continues to attract many visitors every day): This was the last post from Uncomfortable Moments With Putin. It was a blast, but when it started Putin was still a figure of fun on the sidelines with vaguely sinister ambitions. Since his return to the presidency, that isn’t really the case any more. Find out more here: http://www.hrw.org/europecentral-asia/russia
No one dared point out that the target range lay behind them. No one, that is, apart from the unfortunate subordinate in the president’s sights, who had previously been heard to mumble something about the protesters maybe having a point.
Exactly one minute and 28 seconds later, young Bogdan’s failure to secure a new competitive record time had secured him a long night in the company of the ministerial security detail and a pair of boltcutters.
As the wreath was laid, everyone nearby pretended not to hear as Putin outlined to the Russian president the exact methods with which he planned to take his job from him.
Seconds became minutes… minutes became hours. Soon, someone would have to be the first to stop laughing.
Silence fell across the dojo as the president swooped. Then a loud crack rent the air and the screams of Gregori Illyich Antonov began.
Sadly, no joint photograph exists of the recent earth-shattering diplomatic encounter between Vladimir Putin and Naomi Campbell. But anyone present to witness the incident doubtless felt slightly uncomfortable.
Were a river able to look uncomfortable, the River Jordan would be giving it its best shot, as it flows beneath the remorseless gaze of Vladimir Putin.
Top MMA fighter Fedor Emelianenko is not merely cowering from Putin’s tirade of withering criticism, he is also hoping the Russian prime minister will release his testicles from his vice-like grip. (A move Putin learned from his trusted adviser Jean-Claude Van Damme, seen here looking on approvingly.)
As featured in The Times, The Huffington Post, Holy Moly!, The Guardian and, er, the website for the European Council On Foreign Relations.
