[WIDOW CORNEY (spoken)]
You're a cruel man.
And a hardhearted man besides.
[MR. BUMBLE(spoken)]
Hardhearted, Mrs. Corney? Hard?
Are you hardhearted, Mrs. Corney?
[WIDOW CORNEY (spoken)]
Dear me! What a curious question coming
from a single man.
What can you want to know
for, Mr. Bumble? Mr. Bumble, I shall scream!
[MR. BUMBLE]
No you wouldn't, heigh ho.
If I wanted something special,
Then you couldn't say "no".
Did I nearly catch you smiling?
Yes I did. And it's beguiling.
If you hand is close, I'll press it.
Yes, you like it -- come confess it!
Yes, you do...
[WIDOW CORNEY]
No, I don't.
[MR. BUBLE]
Yes, you do!
[WIDOW CORNEY]
I shall scream! I shall scream!
'Til they hasten to my rescue, I shall scream.
[MR. BUMBLE]
Since there's nobody that's near us
Who cold see us. or could hear us?
If you ask you can I kiss you
Say what will my pretty miss do?
[WIDOW CORNEY]
I shall scream, scream, scream!
[MR. BUMBLE]
If I pinch you one pinch --
From you shy protective shell
Can I un-inch you one inch?
Will my blinthesome, buxum beauty
Let her suitor do his duty?
Tho' his lap ain't very large, dear
Sit upon it -- There's no charge, dear.
Will you sit?
[WIDOW CORNEY]
No, I shan't
[MR. BUMBLE]
Will you sit?
[WIDOW BUMBLE]
I shall scream! I shall scream!
For the safety of my virtue I shall sream
Tho' your knee is rather cosy,
See my cheeks are getting rosy.
You would have me in your power.
If I sat here for an hour...
[MR. BUMBLE]
I shall scream, scream, scream!
[WIDOW CORNEY]
You're a naughty bad man.
If you think I can't be proper,
Prim and haughty -- I can
And you'll pardon if I mention
You must state your true intention.
[MR. BUMBLE]
Is there not another room here?
[WIDOW CORNEY]
[MR. BUMBLE]
If there would be a bride and groom here --- would there be?
[WIDOW CORNEY]
Well there might.
[MR. BUMBLE]
We shall see.
[WIDOW CORNEY]
I shall scream! I shall scream!
At the thought of what you're thinking, I shall scream!
[MR. BUMBLE]
You will wonder where the scream went
When we ome to an agreement
As my lovey-dovey is chubby
Could she love a chubby hubby?
[WIDOW CORNEY]
I shall scream, Mr. Bumble!
I shall scream, Bumble-Wumble!
[DODGER]
Line up!
[BOYS]
Line up!
[DODGER]
Single file!
[BOYS]
Single file!
Slope arms
Left...left
Right...right...Ol! Ol!
[FAGIN]
You can go,
But be back soon
You can go,
But while you're working.
This place,
I'm pacing round...
Until you're home,
...Safe and sound
Fare thee well,
But be back soon
Who can tell
Where danger's lurking?
Do not forget this tune
Be back soon.
[BOYS]
How could we forget
How could we let
Our dear old Fagin worry?
We love him so.
We'll come back home
In, oh, such a great big
Hurry
[DODGER]
It's him that pays the piper.
[BOYS]
It's us that pipes his tune
So long, fare thee well
Pip! Pip! Cheerio!
We'll be back soon.
[FAGIN]
You can go
But be back soon
You can go,
But bring back plenty
Of pocket hankerchiefs
And you should be clever thieves.
Whip it quick,
and be back soon
There's a sixpence here for twenty
Ain't that a lovely tune?
Be back soon.
[DODGER]
Our pockets'll hold
A watch of gold
That chimes upon the hour
[BOYS]
A wallet fat
An old man's hat
[DODGER]
The crown jewels from the tower
We know
The Bow Street Runners,
[ALL]
But they don't know this tune.
So long, fare thee well.
Pip! Pip! Cheerio!
We'll be back soon.
[FAGIN]
Cheerio, but be back soon.
I dunno, somehow I'll miss you
I love you, that why I
Say, "Cheerio"...
Not goodbye.
Don't be gone long
Be back soon.
Give me one long,
Last look...
Bless you.
Remember our old tune...
Be back soon!
[BOYS]
We must disappear,
We'll be back here,
Today...
...Perhaps tomorrow.
We'll miss you too
[FAGIN]
It's sad but true
That parting is such sweet sorrow.
[ALL]
And when we're in the distance
You'll hear this
Whipered tune...
So long, fare thee well
Pip! Pip! Cheerio!
We'll be back soon
And when we're in the distance
You'll hear this
Whipered tune...
So long, fare thee well
Pip! Pip! Cheerio!
We'll be back soon
[FAGIN]
Cheerio, but be back soon.
I dunno, somehow I'll miss you
I love you, that why I
Say, "Cheerio"...
Not goodbye.
Don't be gone long
Be back soon.
Give me one long,
Last look...
Bless you.
Remember our old tune...
Be back soon!
[BOYS]
We must disappear,
We'll be back here,
Today...
...Perhaps tomorrow.
We'll miss you too
It's sad but true
That parting is such sweet sorrow.
And when we're in the distance
You'll hear this
Whipered tune...
So long, fare thee well
Pip! Pip! Cheerio!
We'll be back soon
You'll hear this
Whipered tune...
So long, fare thee well
Pip! Pip! Cheerio!
We'll be back soon
And when we're in the distance
You'll hear this
Whipered tune...
So long, fare thee well
Pip! Pip! Cheerio!
We'll be back soon
[OLIVER]
So long, fare thee well
Pip! Pip! Cheerio!
We'll be back soon
[BOYS]
So long, fare thee well
Pip! Pip! Cheerio!
Jean
Oliver
From the 1969 film "The Prime Of Miss Jean Brodie" starring Oscar-winner
Maggie Smith
Written by Rod McKuen
Peak chart position # 2 in 1969
Jean, Jean, roses are red
All the leaves have gone green
And the clouds are so low
You can touch them, and so
Come out to the meadow, Jean
Jean, Jean, you're young and alive
Come out of your half-dreamed dream
And run, if you will, to the top of the hill
Open your arms, bonnie Jean
Till the sheep in the valley come home my way
Till the stars fall around me and find me alone
When the sun comes a-singin' I'll still be waitin'
For Jean, Jean, roses are red
And all of the leaves have gone green
While the hills are ablaze with the moon's yellow haze
Come into my arms, bonnie Jean
(Jean, Jean)
Jean, you're young and alive!!
Come out of your half-dreamed dream
And run, if you will to the top of the hill
Come into my arms, bonnie Jean
Jean
La-la-la-la, etc.
NANCY
As long as he needs me...
Oh, yes, he does need me...
In spite of what you see...
...I'm sure that he needs me.
Who else would love him still
When they've been used so ill?
He knows I always will...
As long as he needs me.
I miss him so much when he is gone,
But when he's near me
I don't let on...
...The way I feel inside.
The love, I have to hide...
The hell! I've got my pride
As long as he needs me.
He doesn't say the things he should.
He acts the way he thinks he should.
But all the same,
I'll play
This game
His way.
As long as he needs me...
I know where I must be.
I'll cling on steadfastly...
As long as he needs me.
As long as life is long...
I'll love him right or wrong,
And somehow, I'll be strong...
As long as he needs me.
If you are lonely
Then you will know...
When someone needs you,
You love them so.
I won't betray his trust...
Though people say I must.
I've got to stay true, just
who will buy this wonderful morning
such a sky you never did see
who will tie it up with a ribbon
and put it in a box for me
so i can see it at my leisure
whenever things go wrong
and i will keep it as a treasure
to last my whole life lllloooooonnnnnggggg
who will buy this wonderful feeling
im so high ii swear i can fly
me oh my i dont want to loose it
so wot am ito do
to keep the sky so blue
there must be someone who will
buyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
[MR. BUMBLE (spoken)]
Liberal terms, Mr. Sowerberry...Liberal terms? Three pounds!
[SOWERBERRY (spoken)]
Well, as a matter of fact, I was needing a boy....
[MR. BUMBLE]
He's a born undertaker's mute.
I can see him in his black silk suit.
Following behind the funeral procession...
With his features fixed in a suitable expression.
There'll be horses with tall balck plumes
To escort us to the family tombs,
With mourners
In all corners
Who've been taught to week in tune.
Then the coffin lined with satin.
That's your funeral.
[MRS. SOWERBERRY]
That's your funeral.
[SOWERBERRY]
Large enough to wear your hat in.
That's your funearl.
[MRS. SOWERBERRY]
That's your funeral.
[SOWERBERRY]
We're just here to glamourize you for that
Endless sleep.
[MRS. SOWERBERRY AND SOWERBERRY]
You might just as well look fetching
When you're six feet deep.
[MRS. SOWERBERRY]
At the wake we'll drink a toddy
To the body beautiful.
[MR. SOWERBERRY]
That's your funeral.
[MRS. SOWERBERRY]
Not our funeral.
[BOTH]
That's your funeral.
[SOWERBERRY]
If you're fond of overeating
That's your funeral.
[MRS. SOWERBERRY]
That's your funeral.
[SOWERBERRY]
Starve yourself by undereating
That's your funeral.
[THE FUNERAL PROCESSION]
That's your funeral?
[MRS. SOWERBERRY]
Visualize the earth descentind on you clod by clod.
You can't come back when you're buried
Underneath the ...sod.
[MRS. SOWERBERRY AND SOWERBERRY]
We will not reduce our prices.
Keep your vices usual.
[SOWERBERRY]
That's your funeral.
[MRS. SOWERBERY]
Not our funeral.
[MRS. SOWERBERRY]
Not our funeral.
[ALL]
That's your funeral.
[MR. BUMBLE]
I don't think this song is funny.
[SOWERBERRY]
That's your funeral.
[MR. BUMBLE]
Here's the boy, now where's the money?
[SOWERBERRY]
That's your funeral.
[MR. BUMBLE]
That's your funeral.
[SOWERBERRY]
We don't harbour thoughts macabre,
There's no need to frown.
[MRS. SOWERBERRY AND SOWEBERRY]
In the end we'll either burn you up or nail you donw.
We love coughs and wheezes
And diseases called incurable.
That's your funeral.
No one else's funearl.
[SOWERBERRY]
That's your...
[MRS. SOWEBERRY]
That's your...
[BOTH]
MR. BROWNLOW
(spoken)
Stop that boy! My pocket's been picked! Stop, thief! That's the boy!
[FAGIN (spoken)]
Just do everything you see Dodger and Charlie do.
Make 'em your models, my dear --
especially Dodger -- He's going to be right little...
Bill Sikes! Tell me my dear, you see my hankerchief?
See if you can take it from me without my noticing --
like you saw the others do.
Rum-tum-tum,
Rum-tum-tum
Pom-pom-pom
Pom-pom-pom
Skiddle-eye-tye
Tee-rye-tye-tye
Tee-ruppa-tuppa-ruppa-tum-tum
You've got to pick a pocket or two!
COMPANY
Food, glorious food!
Hot sausage and mustard!
While we're in the mood
Cold jelly and custard!
Pease pudding and saveloys
"What next?" is the question
Rich gentlemen have it boys
Indigestion!
Consider yourself at home
Consider yourself one of the family
We've taken to you so strong.
It's clear we're going to get along.
Consider yourself well in
Consider yourself part of the furniture
There isn't a lot to spare
Who cares what ever we've got we share
If it should chance to be we should see some harder days
Empty larder days.
Why grouse?
Always a chance we1ll meet somebody to foot the bill
Then the drinks are on the house.
Consider yourself our mate
We don't want to have no fuss.
For after some consideration we can state
Consider yourself one of us!
I'd do anything
For you, dear, anything
For you mean ev'rything to me.
I know that I'd go anywhere
For your smile, anywhere
For your smile ev'rywhere I'd see.
Let the clouds of grey come along
Never mind if they come along
Surely they won't stay very long
If you'll only say
You're mine alone.
I'd risk ev'rything
For this bliss ev'rything
[DODGER (spoken)]
So, Oliver Twist, you're coming with me.
[OLIVER (spoken)]
Are you sure Mr. Fagin won't mind?
[DODGER (spoken)]
Mind?!
Consider yourself at home.
Consider yourlef one of the familhy.
We've taken to you so strong.
It's clear we're going to get along.
Consider yourself well in
Consider yourslef par to the furniture.
There isn't a lot to spare.
Who cares?..What ever we've goin we share!
If it should chance to be
We should see
Some harder days
Empty larder days
Why grouse?
Alsyas a-chance we'll meet
Somebody
To foot the bill
Then the drinks are on the house!
Consider yourself our mate.
We do't want to have no fuss,
For after some consideration, we can state...
Consider yourself
One of us!
Consider yourself...
[OLIVER]
At home?
[DODGER]
Consider yourself...
[OLIVER]
One of the family
[CAPTAIN]
We've taken to you
[OLIVER]
So strong
[HAND WALKER]
It's clear...we're...
[ALL]
Going to get along
[DODGER]
Consider yourself...
[CHARLIE BATES]
Well in!
[DODGER]
Consider yourself...
[SNAKE]
Part of the furniture
[OLIVER]
There isn't a lot to spare
[ALL]
Who cares?
Whatever we got we share
[DODGER]
Nobody tries to be lah-di-dah or uppity--
There a cup-o'-tea for all.
[ALL]
Only it's wise to be handy wiv a rolling pin
Whne the landlord omes to call!
[DODGER]
Consider yourself
Our mate.
We don't want to have no fuss
[ALL]
For after some consideration we can sate
[OLIVER]
Considter yourself
[DODGER]
Yes!
[ALL]
One of us!
[COMPANY]
Consider yourself at home...
We've taken to you so strong.
Consider yourself well in...
There isn't a lot to spare
If it should chance to be
We should see
Some harder days
Empty larder days --
Why grouse?
Always a chane we'll meet
Somebody
To food the bill --
Then the drinks are on the house!
Consider yourself our mate.
We don't want to have no fuss
For after some consideration, we can state...
Consider yourself...
One of us!
[DODGER]
Consider yourself
[ALL]
At home.
[DODGER]
We've taken to you
[ALL]
So strong
[DODGER]
Consider yourself
[ALL]
Well in.
There isn't a lot to spare.
Nobody tries to be lah-di-dah or uppity.
There's a cup-o'-tea for all
Only it's wise to be handy wiv a rolling pin
Wen the landlord comes to call
Consider yourself our mate
We don't want to have no fuss
For after some consideration we can state
Consider yourself
One of us...
For after some consideration we can state
Consider yourself...
One of us!
If it should chance to be
We should see some harder days,
Empyt larder days,
Why grouse?
Always a chance we'll meet
Somebody to foot the bill.
Then the drinks are on the house.
Consider yourself at home.
Consider yourself one of the family.
We've taken to you so strong.
It's clear we're going to get along.
Consider yourself well in.
Consider yourself part of the furniture.
There isn't a lot to spare.
Who cares?
Whatever we've got we share.
If it should chance to be
We should see some harder days,
Empty larder days,
Why grouse?
Always a chance we'll meet
Somebody to foot the bill.
Then the drinks are on the house.
Consider yourself our mate.
We don't want to have no fuss
For after some considertaion we can state
Consider yourself...
SIKES
Strong men tremble when they hear it!
They've got cause enough to fear it!
It's much blacker than they smear it!
Nobody mentions...
My name!
Rich men hold their five-pound notes out --
Saves me emptying their couats out.
They know I could tear their throats out
Just to live up to...
My name!
Wiv me
Jemmy in me hand,
Lemme see the man who dares
Stop me.
Taking what I may
He can start to say his prayers!
Biceps like an iron girder,
Fit for doing of a murder,
If I just so much as heard a
Bloke even whisper...
(spoken) My name! Bill Sikes...
(sung) Some Toff, slumming wiv his valet,
Bumped into me in the alley
Now is eyes'll never tally
He'd never heard of ...
My name!
One bloke
Used to boast the claim
He could take my name in vain...
Poor bloke...
Shame 'e was so green
Never was 'e seen again!
Once bad -- What's the good of turning?
In hell, I'll be there-a-burning
Meanwhile, thing of what I'm earning
All on account of...
My name!
What is it? What is it? What is it?
NANCY
NANCY
(spoken) Bill! Let him go, Bill! For pity's sake, let him go!
Why do you look at me like that, Bill?
SIKES
(spoken) Give me away would yer?
NANCY
(spoken) No, Bill, no not you, never you.
SIKES
(spoken) Get away from me, woman!
NANCY
(spoken) No, I won't let go Bill. I've been true to you, upon my soul, I have.
SIKES
(spoken) Get away from me!
NANCY
(spoken) Oh God! Help me!
SIKES
(spoken) Stop staring at me, woman! Close your damn eyes! Damn you! Your eyes!
(Nancy is killed.)
SIKES
(spoken) Fagin! Quick Fagin!
FAGIN
(spoken) Bill?
SIKES
(spoken) The game's up Fagin!
FAGIN
(spoken) What have you done?
Oh my God Bill, no!
No, you haven't!
No, Bill!
Out boys, out!!
DODGER
(spoken) What do we do?
FAGIN
(spoken) Live up to your name! Dodge about!
(Later...)
CROWD
(spoken) Sikes, Sikes, Sikes..
(spoken) He's on the roof!
SIKES
(spoken) Stay back or I'll kill the boy!
Give me the rope, boy. The rope!
The eyes! The eyes!
MR. BROWNLOW
CHAIRMAN
(spoken) Ladies and gentlemen, brethren and sinners all! I call upon our Goddess of the Virtues to give us her well known rendition of the old school song -- Oom-Pah-Pah!
NANCY
(spoken) All right, shut up, you lot! A bit of culture now! 'Ere we go...
(sung) There's a little ditty
They're singing in the city
Espeshly when they've been
On the gin
Or the beer
If you've got the patience,
Your own imaginations
Will tell you just exactly what you want to hear...
Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!
That's how it goes,
Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!
Ev'ryone knows.
NANCY
They all suppose what they want to suppose
When they hear...oom-pah-pah!!
Mister Percy Snodgrass
Would often have the odd glass --
But never when he thought anybody could see.
Secretly he'd buy it,
And drink it on the quiet,
And dream he was an Earl
Wiv a girl on each knee!
CUSTOMERS AND NANCY
Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!
That's how it goes.
Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!
Ev'ryone knows...
NANCY
What is the cause of his red shiny nose?
Could it be...oom-pah-pah!?
Pretty little Sally
Goes walking down the alley,
Displays her pretty ankles to all of the men.
They could see her garters,
But not for free-and-gratis--
An inch or two, and then she knows
When to say when!
Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!
That's how it goes.
Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!
Ev'ryone knows...
NANCY
Whether it's hidden, or whether it shows --
It's the same...oom-pah-pah!
She was from the country,
But now she's up a gum-tree --
She let a feller feed 'er, then lead 'er along
What's the good o' cryin'?
She's made a bed to lie in
She's glad to bring the coin in,
And join in this song!
Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!
That's how it goes!
Oom-pah-pah!Oom-pah-pah!
Ev'ryone knows.
NANCY
She is no longer the same blushing rose
Ever since ... oom-pah-pah!
(spoken) Altogether now!
NANCY
(sung) There's a little ditty
They're singing in the city
Espeshly when they've been
On the gin
Or the beer
If you've got the patience,
Your own imaginations
Will tell you just exactly what you want to hear...
COMPANY
Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!
That's how it goes,
Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!
Ev'ryone knows.
They all suppose what they want to suppose
When they hear...oom-pah-pah!!
Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!
That's how it goes,
Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!
Ev'ryone knows.
NANCY
They all suppose what they want to suppose
When they hear...oom-pah-pah!!
Good morning starshine
The earth says, "Hello"
You twinkle above us
We twinkle below
Good morning starshine
You lead us along
My love and me as we sing
Our early morning singing song
Gliddy glup gloopy
Nibby nabby noopy la la la lo lo
Sabba sibby sabba
Nooby abba nabba le le lo lo
Tooby ooby walla nooby abba nabba
Early morning singing song
Good morning starshine
You lead us along
My love and me as we sing
Our early morning singing song
Gliddy glup gloopy
Nibby nabby noopy la la la lo lo
Sabba sibby sabba
Nooby abba nabba le le lo lo
Tooby ooby walla nooby abba nabba
Early morning singing song
Singing a song, humming a song
Singing a song, loving a song
Laughing a song
Sing the song, sing the song
Song the sing
Song, song, song, sing
[BOYS]
Is it worth the waiting for?
If we live 'til eighty four
All we ever get is gru...el!
Ev'ry day we say our prayer --
Will they change the bill of fare?
Still we get the same old gru...el!
There's not a crust, not a crumb can we find,
Can we beg, can we borrow, or cadge,
But there's nothing to stop us from getting a thrill
When we all close our eyes and imag...ine
Food, glorious food!
Hot sausage and mustard!
While we're in the mood --
Cold jelly and custard!
Pease pudding and saveloy!
What next is the question?
Rich gentlemen have it, boys --
In-di-gestion!
Food, glorious food!
We're anxious to try it.
Three banquets a day --
Our favourite diet!
Just picture a great big steak --
Fried, roasted or stewed.
Oh, food,
Wonderful food,
Marvellous food,
Glorious food.
Food, glorious food!
What is ther emore handsome?
Gulped, swallowed or chewed --
Still worth a kin's ransom.
What is it we dream about?
Wat brings on a sigh?
Piled peaches and cream , about
Six feet high!
Food, glorious food!
Eat right through the menu.
Just loosen your belt
Two inches and then you
Work up a new appetite.
In this interlude --
The food,
Once again, food
Fabulous food,
Glorious food.
Food, glorious food!
Don't care what it looks like --
Burned!
Underdone!
Crude!
Don't care what the cook's like.
Just thinking of growing fat --
Our senses go reeling
One moment of knowing that
Full-up feeling!
Food, glorious food!
What wouldn't we give for
That extra bit more --
That's all that we live for
Why should we be fated to
Do nothing but brood
On food,
Magical food,
Wonderful food,
Marvellous food,
Fabulous food,
[OLIVER]
Beautiful food,
[BOYS]
[NANCY (spoken)]
So, 'ow's it go then Dodger? It's all "bowin'" and "'ats off"...
[DODGER (spoken)]
And "Don't let your petticoats go dangling in the mud,
my darling."
[NANCY (spoken)]
Oh, "And I'll go last."
[DODGER (spoken)]
No, I'll go last.
[NANCY (spoken)]
If you insist.
[DODGER (sung)]
I'll do anything
For you dear anything
For you mean everything to me.
I know that
I'll go anywhere
For your smile, anywhere --
For your smile, ev'rywhere --
I'd see.
[NANCY]
Would you climb a hill?
[DODGER]
Anything!
[NANCY]
Wear a daffodil?
[DODGER]
Anything!
[NANCY]
Leave me all your will?
[DODGER]
Anything!
[NANCY]
Even fight my Bill?
[DODGER]
What? Fisticuffs?
I'd risk everything
For one kiss -- everything
Yes, I'd do anything...
[NANCY]
Anything?!
[DODGER]
Anything for you!!
[NANCY (spoken)]
'Ere now, Oliver, you just copy
Dodger and I'll help you out with the words, alright?
So it's "I'll do anything"
[OLIVER (sung)]
I'll do anything
[NANCY (spoken)]
For you dear
[OLIVER (sung)]
For you dear, anything
[NANCY (spoken)]
For you mean
[OLIVER (sung)]
For you mean everything to me
[NANCY (spoken)]
Ah, that's lovely.
[OLIVER]
I know that
I'd go anywhere
For your smile, anywhere --
For your smile, everywhere
I'd see
[BET]
Would you lace my shoe?
[OLIVER]
Anything!
[BET]
Paint your face bright blue?
[OLIVER]
Anything!
[BET]
Catch a kangaroo?
[OLIVER]
Anything!
[BET]
Go to Timbuktu?
[OLIVER]
And back again!
I'd risk ev'rything
For one kiss -- everything --
Yes, I'd do anything
[BET]
Anything?!
[OLIVER]
Anything for you!!
[DODGER (spoken)]
Dance, Nancy.
[NANCY (spoken)]
Oh, alright, Dodge. C'mon boys!
1-2-3...
[FAGIN]
Would you rob a shop?
[ALL]
Anything!
[FAGIN]
Would you risk the "drop"?
[ALL]
Anything!
[FAGIN]
Tho' your eyes go, 'pop'
[ALL]
Anything!
[FAGIN]
When you come down 'plop'
[ALL]
Hang ev'rything!
We'd risk life and limb
To keep you in the swim
Yes, we'd do anything...
[FAGIN]
Anything?!
[ALL]
[FAGIN (spoken)]
You see, Oliver...
[sung] In this life, one thing counts
In the bank, large amounts
I'm afraid these don't grow on trees,
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two, boys,
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two.
[BOYS]
Large amounts don't grow on trees.
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two.
[FAGIN (spoken)]
Let's show Oliver how it's done, shall we, my dears?
[sung] Why should we break our backs
Stupidly paying tax?
Better get some untaxed income
Better to pick-a-pocket or two.
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two, boys
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two.
[BOYS]
Why should we all break our backs?
Better pick-a-pocket or two.
[FAGIN (spoken)]
Who says crime doesn't pay?
[sung] Robin Hood, what a crook!
Gave away, what he took.
Charity's fine, subscribe to mine.
Get out and pick-a-pocket or two
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two, boys
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two.
[BOYS]
Robin Hood was far too good
He had to pick-a-pocket or two.
[FAGIN]
Take a tip from Bill Sikes
He can whip what he likes.
I recall, he started small
He had to pick-a-pocket or two.
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two, boys
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two.
[BOYS]
We can be like old Bill Sikes
If we pick-a-pocket or two.
[FAGIN (spoken)]
Stop thief!
Dear old gent passing by
Something nice takes his eye
Everything's clear, attack the rear
Get in and pick-a-pocket or two.
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two, boys
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two.
[BOYS]
Have no fear, attack the rear
Get in and pick-a-pocket or two.
[FAGIN]
When I see someone rich,
Both my thumbs start to itch
Only to find some peace of mind
We have to pick-a-pocket or two.
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two, boys
You've got to pick-a-pocket or two.
[BOYS]
Just to find some peace of mind
[FAGIN AND BOYS]
ROSE SELLER
Who will buy my sweet red roses?
Two blooms for a penny.
Who will buy my sweet red roses?
Two blooms for a penny.
MILKMAID
Will you buy any milk today, mistress?
Any milk today, mistress?
ROSE SELLER
Who will buy my sweet red roses?
MILKMAID
Any milk today, mistress?
ROSE SELLER
Two blooms for a penny.
STRAWBERRY SELLER
Ripe strawberries, ripe!
Ripe strawberries, ripe!
STRAWBERRY SELLER
Ripe strawberries, ripe!
MILKMAID
Any milk today, mistress?
ROSE SELLER
Who will buy my sweet red roses?
KNIFE GRINDER
Knives, knives to grind!
Any knives to grind?
Knives, knives to grind!
Any knives to grind?
Who will buy?
STRAWBERRY SELLER
Who will buy?
MILKMAID
Who will buy?
ROSE SELLER
Who will buy?
OLIVER
Who will buy
This wonderful morning?
Such a sky
You never did see!
ROSE SELLER
Who will buy my sweet red roses?
OLIVER
Who will tie
It up with a ribbon
And put it in a box for me?
STRAWBERRY SELLER
Ripe strawberries, ripe!
OLIVER
So I could see it at my leisure
Whenever things go wrong
And I would keep it as a treasure
To last my whole life long.
MILKMAID
Any milk today?
OLIVER
Who will buy
This wonderful feeling?
I'm so high
I swear I could fly.
KNIFE GRINDER
Knives! Knives to grind!
STRAWBERRY SELLER
Ripe strawberries, ripe!
OLIVER
Me, oh my!
I don't want to lose it
So what am I to do
To keep the sky so blue?
There must be someone who will buy...
LONG SONG SELLER
Who will buy?
KNIFE GRINDER
Who will buy?
MILKMAID
Who will buy?
ROSE SELLER
Who will buy?
COMPANY AND OLIVER (as opposed to "Oliver and Company" [Disney movie])
Who will buy
This wonderful morning?
Such a sky
You never did see!
Who will tie
It up with a ribbon
And put it in a box for me?
There'll never be a day so sunny,
It could not happen twice.
Where is the man with all the money?
It's cheap at half the price!
Who will buy
Who will buy
This wonderful feeling?
I'm so high
I swear I could fly.
Me, oh my!
I don't want to lose it
So what am I to do
To keep the sky so blue?
OLIVER
There must be someone who will buy...
MILKMAID
Must be someone
STRAWBERRY SELLER
Must be someone
KNIFE GRINDER
Must be someone
Jouw lach deed mij smelten
En je ogen maakten mij blind
Ik liep voortdurend op stelten
En jij ging steeds door het lint
Ik was het beu en dat had je wel gehoord
Maar je hoefde niets te zeggen want ik was aan 't woord
Ik zei:
Shut Up! Shut Up!
Geluk bestaat maar niet voor ons
't Is voorbij! 't Is voorbij!
Shut Up! Shut Up!
't Ging voor een tijd maar niet voor lang
't Is voorbij! 't Is voorbij!
't Is voorbij! 't Is voorbij!
'k Zag de liefde op je lippen
En verleiding in je blik
Je hoefde maar te knippen
Het was een vreemde kick!
Ik was het beu en dat had je wel gehoord
Maar je hoefde niets te zeggen want ik was aan 't woord
Ik zei:
Shut Up! Shut Up!
Geluk bestaat, maar niet voor ons
't Is voorbij! 't Is voorbij!
Shut Up! Shut Up!
't Ging voor een tijd, maar niet voor lang
't Is voorbij! 't Is voorbij!
't Is voorbij! 't Is voorbij!
Ik was het beu en dat had je wel gehoord
Maar je hoefde niets te zeggen want ik was aan 't woord...
Shut Up! Shut Up!
Geluk bestaat, maar niet voor ons
't Is voorbij! 't Is voorbij!
Shut Up! Shut Up!
't Ging voor een tijd, maar niet voor lang
't Is voorbij! 't Is voorbij!
FAGIN
A man's got a heart, hasn't he?
Joking apart -- hasn't he?
And tho' I'd be the first one to say that I wasn't a saint...
I'm finding it hard to be really as black as they paint...
I'm reviewing the situation
Can a fellow be a villain all his life?
All the trials and tribulations!
Better settle down and get myself a wife.
And a wife would cook and sew for me,
And come for me, and go for me,
The fingers, she will wag at me.
The money whe will take me.
A misery, she'll make from me...
...I think I'd better thing it out again!
A wife you can keep, anyway
I'd rather sleep, anyway.
Left without anyone in the world,
And I'm starting from now
So "how to win friends and to influence people"
--So how?
I'm reviewing the situation,
I must quickly look up ev'ryone I know.
Titled people -- with a station --
Who can help me make a real impressive show!
I will own a suite at Claridges,
And run a fleet of carriages,
And wave at all the duchesses
With friendliness, as much as is
Befitting of my new estate...
"Good morrow to you, magistrate!" Oh gawd!
...I think I'd better think it out again.
So where shall I go -- somebody?
Who do I know? Nobody!
All my dearest companions
Have always been villains and thieves...
So at my time of life
I should start turning over new leaves...?
I'm reviewing the situation.
If you want to eat -- you've got to earn a bob!
Is it such a humiliation
For a robber to perform an honest job?
So a job I'm getting, possibly,
I wonder who my boss'll be?
I wonder if he'll take to me...?
What bonuses he'l make to me...?
I'll start at eight and finish late,
At normal rate, and all..but wait!
...I think I'd better think it out again.
What happens when I'm seventy?
Must come a time...seventy.
When you're old, and it's cold
And who cares if you live or you die,
Your one consolation's the money
You may have put by...
I'm reviewing the situation.
I'm a bad 'un and a bad 'un I shall stay!
You'll be seeing no transformation,
But it's wrong to be a rogue in ev'ry way.
I don't want nobody hurt for me,
Or made to do the dirt for me.
This rotten life is not for me.
It's getting far too hot for me.
Don't want no one to rob for me.
But who will find a job for me,
There is no in between for me
But who will change the scene for me?
...I think I'd better think it out again!
( MR. BUMBLE) Oliver, Oliver
Never before has a boy wanted more
Oliver, Oliver
Won't ask for more when he knows what's in store
There's a dark, thin winding stairway without any banister
Which we'll throw him down
And feed him the cockroaches served in a canister
Oliver, Oliver
What will he do when he's turned black and blue
He will rue the day somebody named him Ol-i-ver
(BOTH)Oliver, Oliver
Never before has a boy wanted more
Oliver, Oliver
Won't ask for more when he knows what's in store
There's a long, thin winding stairway without any banister
Which we'll throw him down
And feed him the cockroaches served in a canister
(Ms Corney)Oliver, Oliver
What heavens pray will the govenors say
(MRS. BUMBLE) They will lay the blame on the one who named him
[NANCY (spoken)]
Plummy and slam!
[FAGIN (spoken)]
Nancy! Wake up boys! The ladies is 'ere.
[DODGER (spoken)]
Ladies?! Cor! 'Ark at him!
[NANCY (spoken)]
'Ere, we'll have less of that if you don't mind!
'Ere, so where's the gin, then, Fagin?
[FAGIN (spoken)]
All in moderation, my dear, all in moderation.
Too much gin can be a dangerous thing for a pure, young girl.
[NANCY (spoken)]
Ooh, and what's wrong with a bit of danger then, eh, Mr. Fagin?
After all it's about the only excitement we get.
And who would deny us that small pleasure?
[sung] Small pleasures, small pleasures
Who would deny us these?
Gin toddies -- large measuress --
No skimpin' if you please!
I rough it, I love it
Life is a game of chance.
I never tire of it --
Leading this merry dance.
If you don't mind having to go without things
It's a fine life.
[ALL]
It's a fine life.
[NANCY]
Tho' it ain't all jolly old pleasure outings...
It's a fine life
[ALL]
It's a fine life.
[NANCY]
When you got someone to love
You forget your cares and strife
Let the prudes look down on us
Let the wide world frown on us
It's a fine,
[ALL]
Fine life!
[NANCY (spoken)]
Ain't that right, Bet? Go on, you tell 'em girl.
[BET]
Who cares if straightlaces
Sneer at us in the street?
Fine airs and fine graces
[NANCY]
Don't have to sin to eat.
[BOTH]
We wander through London
[NANCY]
Who knows what we many find?
[BOTH]
There's pockets left undone
On many a behind.
[NANCY]
If you don't mind taking it as it turns out,
It's a fine life!
[ALL]
It's a fine life!
[NANCY]
Keep the candle burning until it burns out
It's a fine life.
[ALL]
It's a fine life.
[NANCY]
Though you sometimes do come by
The occasional black eye
You can always cover one
'Til he blacks the other one
But you don't dare cry.
[BET]
No flounces, no feathers
No frills and furbelows
All winds and all weathers
Ain't good for fancy clo'es
[NANCY (spoken)]
That's true.
[sung] These trappings,
[BET]
These ta'ers
[BOTH]
These we can just afford.
[NANCY]
What future?
[BET]
What ma'ers?
[BOTH]
We've got our bed and board.
[NANCY]
If you don't mind having to deal with Fagin
It's a fine life!
[ALL]
It's a fine life!
[NANCY]
Though diseased rats threaten to bring the plague in
It's a fine life!
[ALL]
It's a fine life!
[NANCY]
But the grass is green and dense
On the right side of the 'fence'.
[BOTH]
And we take good care of it
That we get our share of it
And we don't mean pence.
No! If you don't mind having to like or lump it...
It's a fine life
[ALL]
It's a fine life!
[NANCY]
Tho' there's no tea-supping and eating crumpet
It's a fine life!
[ALL]
It's a fine life!
[NANCY]
Not for me, the happy home
Happy husband, happy wife
Tho' it sometimes touches me...
...For the likes of such as me...
Mine's a fine...
[ALL]
[WIDOW CORNEY (spoken)]
You're a cruel man.
And a hardhearted man besides.
[MR. BUMBLE(spoken)]
Hardhearted, Mrs. Corney? Hard?
Are you hardhearted, Mrs. Corney?
[WIDOW CORNEY (spoken)]
Dear me! What a curious question coming
from a single man.
What can you want to know
for, Mr. Bumble? Mr. Bumble, I shall scream!
[MR. BUMBLE]
No you wouldn't, heigh ho.
If I wanted something special,
Then you couldn't say "no".
Did I nearly catch you smiling?
Yes I did. And it's beguiling.
If you hand is close, I'll press it.
Yes, you like it -- come confess it!
Yes, you do...
[WIDOW CORNEY]
No, I don't.
[MR. BUBLE]
Yes, you do!
[WIDOW CORNEY]
I shall scream! I shall scream!
'Til they hasten to my rescue, I shall scream.
[MR. BUMBLE]
Since there's nobody that's near us
Who cold see us. or could hear us?
If you ask you can I kiss you
Say what will my pretty miss do?
[WIDOW CORNEY]
I shall scream, scream, scream!
[MR. BUMBLE]
If I pinch you one pinch --
From you shy protective shell
Can I un-inch you one inch?
Will my blinthesome, buxum beauty
Let her suitor do his duty?
Tho' his lap ain't very large, dear
Sit upon it -- There's no charge, dear.
Will you sit?
[WIDOW CORNEY]
No, I shan't
[MR. BUMBLE]
Will you sit?
[WIDOW BUMBLE]
I shall scream! I shall scream!
For the safety of my virtue I shall sream
Tho' your knee is rather cosy,
See my cheeks are getting rosy.
You would have me in your power.
If I sat here for an hour...
[MR. BUMBLE]
I shall scream, scream, scream!
[WIDOW CORNEY]
You're a naughty bad man.
If you think I can't be proper,
Prim and haughty -- I can
And you'll pardon if I mention
You must state your true intention.
[MR. BUMBLE]
Is there not another room here?
[WIDOW CORNEY]
[MR. BUMBLE]
If there would be a bride and groom here --- would there be?
[WIDOW CORNEY]
Well there might.
[MR. BUMBLE]
We shall see.
[WIDOW CORNEY]
I shall scream! I shall scream!
At the thought of what you're thinking, I shall scream!
[MR. BUMBLE]
You will wonder where the scream went
When we ome to an agreement
As my lovey-dovey is chubby
Could she love a chubby hubby?
[WIDOW CORNEY]
I shall scream, Mr. Bumble!
I shall scream, Bumble-Wumble!
[WIDOW CORNEY (spoken)]
Get a good price for him, Mr. Bumble.
[MR. BUMBLE]
One boy,
Boy for sale.
He's going cheap.
Only seven guineas.
That -- or thereabouts.
Small boy...
Rather pale...
From lack of sleep.
Feed him gruel dinners.
Stop him getting stout.
If I should say he wasn't very greedy...
I could not, I'd be telling you a tale.
One boy,
Boy for sale.
Come take a peep.
Have you ever seen as
Nice
A boy
! SOUNDTRACK LYRICS
Oliver
MR. BUMBLE
For what you are about to receive
May the Lord make you truly thankful.
BOYS
Amen!
OLIVER
(spoken) Please, Sir, I want some more.
MR. BUMBLE
(spoken) What?!
OLIVER
(spoken) Please, Sir, I want some... more.
MR. BUMBLE
(spoken) More!?
WIDOW CORNEY
Catch him!
MR. BUMBLE
Snatch him!
WIDOW CORNEY
Hold him!
MR. BUMBLE
Scold him!
WIDOW CORNEY
Pounce him!
Trounce him!
Pick him up and bounce him!
MR. BUMBLE
Wait!
Before we put the lad to task
May I be so curious as to ask
His name?
BOYS (whispering)
O-li-ver.
WIDOW CORNEY AND MR. BUMBLE
Oliver! Oliver!
MR. BUMBLE
Never beofre has a boy wanted more!
MR. BUMBLE AND WIDOW CORNEY
Oliver! Oliver!
WIDOW CORNEY
Won't ask for more when he knows what's in store.
MR. BUMBLE
There's a dark, thin, winding stairway
Without any bannister
Which we'll throw him down, and feed him on
Cockrouches served in a canister
ALL
Oliver! Oliver!
MR. BUMBLE
What will he do when he's turned black and blue?
He will curse the day
Somebody named him
ALL
O-li-ver!
MR. BUMBLE
Oliver! Oliver!
Never before has a boy wanted more!
Oliver! Oliver!
WIDOW CORNEY
Won't ask for more
When he knows what's in store.
MR. BUMBLE
There's a sooty chimney
Long overdue for a sweeping out
Which we'll push him up,
And one day next year with the rats he'll be creeping out.
ALL
Oliver! Oliver!
MR. BUMBLE
What will he do?
In this terrible stew?
He will rue the day somebody named him...
ALL AND WIDOW CORNEY
O-li-ver!
GOVERNORS
Oliver!
Oliver!
Never before has a boy asked for more
Oliver!
Oliver!
CHAIRMAN
Pray some decorum restore, I implore...
Let us face this case, it's
Unprecedented, quite utterly.
GOVERNORS
He's disgraced this place.
LARGE GOVERNOR
And encouraging others to swallow in gluttony.
ALL
Oliver!...Oliver!
Lock him in gaol
And then put him on sale,
For the highest bid
Glad to be rid
Of
O-li-ver!
WIDOW CORNEY
(spoken) Lock him up! Collect his belongings then bring him back to me
when you've done. To bed, all of you!
You know that I was overblown by all the card sharks
And the muggers that day
And there were several million lovers
of that dress that's in the window display
And every day they'd say
Oliver
Oliver
Oliver
Oliver don't stay
She was quite a woman
Kind and understanding woman she was
Oh yeah
Sure I really loved her
But she acted like a mother to me
And she loved me and I'd scream
Nancy
Nancy
Nancy
Please take care of me
Oliver, Oliver
Oliver, Oliver
Oliver
Aaaaahhhhhhhhhhh
I was overblown by all the card sharks
And the muggers that day
Several million lovers
of that dress that's in the window display
And every day they'd say
Oliver
Oliver
Oliver
