GET A LIFE: Switched on for peak performance

AS you’re reading this, dozens of thoughts and images will probably flash through your mind.

“What if I don’t finish my work on time?” “If only tomorrow were a holiday!” “I hate my boss!” Then you smell the waft of ginger and onions frying off in the wok from the kitchen just beyond the living room. Mmm... delicious!

The tightness in your body from sleeping poorly, that niggling headache from stressing about your spouse’s grouses, could also be distracting you. And if you’re the sort who can’t sit still for long, you’ll find yourself fidgeting. Or your eyes dart at every movement or visual abstraction in the room.

What gets you present and “in the moment” when you need to be? Here I am looking out from my office window at the lovely view of swimming pools and gardens. There’s that bubbling fountain! When the sun shines a certain way, I can see how those rays just split the light into all those beautiful colours. Simply magical!

What must I do to “come back to now” and get on with my writing? I stand up and bounce a bit, you know, do jumping jacks. Moving my limbs gets my heart pumping and the oxygen flowing through my veins again. Inhale... exhale. Inhale... focus. Exhale... fatigue. Inhale... “I will.” Exhale... excuses. Inhale... flow. Exhale... interruption. Ahh... I feel “back in my body” again.

I shut my door so people know I want my space. I put my mobile on silent. Oh, and let’s print off my intention for the day: I will write my piece by lunchtime. Let’s also post my stand: I will relax and enjoy myself as I express myself with passion. Whoa, I’m happy with that! And then I post my bright sticky notes right where I can see them.

How much of your success depends on your ability to stay present and in the moment? Every expert says that presence is key to mastery. Men, think about the last time you were with your wife. How much of what she said, did you hear? How much do you actually remember?

Every time we attend meetings, every time we speak to people, notice the eyes — the eyes are a great indicator of presence. People generally demonstrate a condition I call TEGO, acronym for: “Their eyes glaze over!” And if laser-beam focus is required for peak performance, just think how we sell ourselves short every day!

Don’t you find it hard to focus when you’re doing things that are quite meaningless (I can’t watch wrestling or boxing) or too easy for you, like licking stamps onto your envelopes? If something just doesn’t interest you, how long could you pay attention?

I wish teachers in schools understood this simple fact. People get excited about things we are interested in. We want to know more about things that are important to us. The important questions are:

Who are you?

What can you do for me?

What happens next?

If this “thing,” after you mastered it, could give you more... influence, free time, more money, more opportunity to explore the things you care about, wouldn’t you pay attention and want to excel? Unless someone or something appeals to our values and identity (our sense of who we are and what’s important to us), then they won’t have much influence on us at all.

What else interferes with your ability to be “all there?” You know the difference between someone who’s “turned off,” and someone who’s “switched on?” You can tell the difference between “alert,” and, “in a coma,” can’t you?

Think about trade and investment. How much revenue is lost when businessmen are boring? They’re boring when they fail to connect and demonstrate the usefulness and value of their goods and services. What happens when civil servants become “flat-liners?” Think opportunity cost because the environment isn’t supportive for innovation and breakthrough.

When you and I are angry and resigned, resentful and unforgiving. When we hold grudges and suspicions against each other. When we protect our pride and ego over the wellbeing of our families and our community. All that gets in the way of staying present and in the moment.

All that negativity is draining and damaging. All that takes us away from our hearts and forces us into our heads, so much so our strategies and our will interfere and interrupt our flow and our essence.

Again we arrive at choice point.

Love, or fear?

The questions are:

Who are we? What do we want?

What happens next?

Failure is daunting

YESTERDAY, the deal that I had worked so hard to put together fell through. My company presented our proposal to a prospective partner and they rejected it. When the other party said, “No,” I felt as if a knife had pierced me, I felt so hurt. All my time and my effort down the drain. I’m struggling for confidence. How can I cope?

I’M sorry. I can imagine your pain. You put your Self into your proposal, and when it got rejected, I can see how you feel rejected too. It’s fine to feel disappointed, frustrated. It’s a natural response for when expectations exceed reality. I’d be surprised if you responded differently, actually! Imagine if you had said, “Who cares?”

Now that you’ve noticed your emotion, breathe.

Breathe, and release. Release means let it out. Talking to me is one way. Venting could be another. Just get it out and let it pass. That’s the key. Let it go. The rejection does not become you. You are not identified by it.

While you’re working to release, pay attention to the level of your hurt. This would measure the level of your resilience. A psychologically-healthy person knows to separate their self-worth from their performance. A balanced person accepts all emotion as ... just emotion. E - energy. E - motion. Energy-in-motion. Moving. Dynamic, not stuck.

Healthy people have their emotions; their emotions don’t have them.
Coping isn’t what you want! You don’t want to choose “survive”. You want to choose, “thrive”. You want confidence. You want to win! Coping won’t get you that. So now think, how would a winner... a confident entrepreneur, deal with, “No, thank you?”

Wise to follow up?

I HAVEN’T heard back from the clients. I’m afraid I may have offended them, although I can’t imagine how I might have done that. What should I do? Should I call them and follow up? What if they think I’m desperate?

THERE’S a flavour of desperation, I agree. There’s also like, “I’m good... if they think so.” We call this being, “other-referent.” How we see ourselves is by how others perceive of us. Is that the truth, though? I’d hope not!

What if you could operate from a place of power? What if you had the control and not them? What would change?

Now think. What are you craving here? What are you attached to? So much so that not getting that, has put you in the spin you’re in? You’re worried you’ve offended someone. Then again, you don’t know how. What’s that about? What do you make it mean about you? What do you think of people who are easily offended?

With the realisations you have now, what would you do differently in your business? How would you like to go forward? Perhaps there are habits you might like to drop? You know what you want, and what you don’t want is feeling desperate and anxious and small.

Remember what you went into business for in the first place? Remember your intentions, your values, and your commitments? From there, decide what you’re going to do next.

 

1 / 1