GOD BLESS CHINA
random UM button

Mugged! My Story By Man From Uranus

Um "Holy Fire" Strawberry Fair 2004

The UM Archive for February, 2003

The Bee Gee murderer

Horrible wakeful night last night interspersed with a nasty nightmare that serialised itself between breaks of insomnia. I was in a large institution and someone was doing vicious knife-murders periodically. There were a lot of dismembered bits of folk lying about. I was afraid for me and mine but we couldn’t seem to leave. Only [...]

Fears and loathings with bad hair

Still feeling a bit wounded about finding my CDs in the Sally Ann’s, although obviously it’s the easiest thing to understand in the world.
Anyway I got this free Domino (record label) CD with my copy of this month’s Wire magazine and as I sat eating my beans on toast and listening to it [...]

That joke is shit now.

Hey, you know my hilarious concept release “UM For Charity”? Suddenly it didn’t seem so funny today when I found three of my CDs in the Salvation Army. I didn’t feel like shelling out £4:50 for my own backwash so I just had them away. Now I’m a bit gutted because I should have left [...]

Car ignorance birds with oily feet come home to roost…

Hubris. That’s what it is.
The other day I was going on about rockin’ ‘em at the Songwriter’s Night, and then the next one I do I’m the most spiritless, stillborn cunt in the world. People do buy CDs at those gigs though. They must have money left over from getting in free or [...]

Are you happy with your dancing partner?

Still at this bleeding self-description malarkey, and I fucking hate it. It’s no wonder I sing songs about goats and tigers and stuff. Perhaps I should begin the blurb by describing this skinny tiger who lives in Cambridge and works in a wholefood shop, but then obviously that wouldn’t do me any favours. Talking of [...]