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Mugged! My Story By Man From Uranus

Um "Holy Fire" Strawberry Fair 2004

The UM Archive for September, 2001

branches claw the wwwindow

Caned, and out of duty, I report.
Someone is shouting “Jungle!” up at Dave’s window.
A sort of gale is beginning.
Sunday night. 10:19.
On Wednesday night it was the Ricky & Peter disco-thing. A sort of success if only because I accidentally walked off with The Mules’ copy of Lonnie [...]

Happy Tuesdays

Yes, the Salvation Army is clearly the place to go. I strolled away today with a Yamaha RX17 Digital Rhythm Programmer and a Yamaha DX 100 Digital Programmable Algorithm Synthesiser for the price of ten pounds, feeling almost guilty. Of course the midi capabilities of the DX100 means that the £100 I spent recently on [...]

Another one in the eye for Christoforou!

Circling around the Sally-Ann for about twenty minutes this morning, waiting for the old-timer who always charges half-price for everything (7″ singles suddenly become 15p because she doesn’t think they’re worth 30p. I took a necklace up to the counter with a £1.85 price tag and she tore off the bit that said £1 and [...]

Monday

Personally, I don’t like Mondays.

A new form of art…

Been reading about Andy Warhol lately.
Happily I’ve invented a new form of art. Richard Rippin was off to a mutual aquaintance’s 40th birthday party last night, and I mentioned that although I’d rather eat shit in hell than be there myself, I’d have given anything to be a fly on the wall. Richard [...]

Saturday-styles

7:30 rise. Porridge. Argument. Chazzers (Spent 8 quid on a hoodie, would you credit it?). Cold curry. Made-up, discussion, argument of sorts. Jumble sale.
For some unfathomable reason Syd has changed his views on jumblies. As we all barged in and lurched for the tables I was genuinely astonished to hear helpless chuckling going [...]

the wrong dream

When I went back to bed this morning I had a weird dream. I was in some deserted hotel/library kind of building which I kept wandering around, and all I could think about was how perfect a location it would be for some kind of gangsta shoot-out, or possibly the filming of a gangsta shoot-out, [...]

“feelingfuzzyfelt”

Got sent the compilation that Dave, Alex and Phil have been working on for the past few months – “feelingfuzzyfelt”. I was certainly feeling a bit fuzzy this morning, partially because I’m ill with cold, but mainly because of the comedic amount of alcohol I threw into my system last night. I butterflied from [...]

PUB

I am now going to the pub.