long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away, my first love was Music, and She was mine i was Hers. those who received a copy of “the sabre” may remember that quite a few of those 333 poems made references to musical inspiration. as well, and undocumented, many of those “poems” were lyrics i created to remember melodies that i didn’t have the time or equipment to otherwise record.
{and yeah, on a side note, the number 333 was significant, because i consider myself only half evil. shut up.}
the ghost that i laid to rest, and which i’ve honestly not discussed with anyone yet, was a surprising ghost to revisit and to now have at ease, for it was a ghost in the form of a blockage. meeting up with this ghost was neither foreseen nor planned, and now creates an interesting conundrum for me. i already find myself once again driving around and humming to myself instead of listening to the radio. anybody got a decent midi keyboard they want to donate to the cause? it ain’t like i’m allowed to buy photographic equipment these days, let alone musical stuff. i have songs in my head again, and many of them were originally composed when i was somewhere between the ages of 10 and 18, riding on my bike in my old neighborhood.
The view going south down Mertz Avenue at Senova Street. The title given to this photo in the popup is from Simple Mind’s “This Earth That You Walk Upon”, one of my favorite songs at the time I left San Antonio (most memories associated with this song are actually from Austin, though), and which literally happened to come up in my playlist rotation while I was writing this.
so, as i already stated, and as you have probably already guessed, i went by the house i grew up in. it’s a humorously eclectic thing i do, this working in numbers. i drove by the house exactly three times. it’s effectively been twenty-one years since i was there (in fact, i got a kick out of telling people i was last in San Antonio an “adult ago”—think about it….), which is the seventh third (or the third seventh, if you prefer). either way, basic primes hold a relevance for me for many reasons. numerologically speaking, 3 is the number which relates to resurrection, revival and rejuvenation and 7 is the law of motion. any other Jungian correlations are strictly intentional (so there, hah!)
my first drive down Teakwood Lane was a bit disconcerting. during my last couple of years of high school, there was a field across Jones-Maltsberger Road from us that used to have baseball fields when i was younger, and which was being built up. in fact, the construction site itself became a haunt of mine, but since i have fonder memories of being much younger, i found that having the whole area between Jones-Maltsberger and the MacAllister Freeway built up to be just kind of sad.
the tree on the left of these photos and i used to have a great relationship, despite my falling out of it one year. the big knot up front was depressing to see. when i was last there for a brief drive-by when i brought The Elder and Unknown and her mother home back in 1990, that was a fresh cut. the limb-that-used-to-be was a handy foothold, and thus a launchpad for many a youthful excursion in responsibility-evasion.
i took these two photos on the second drive-by. anxious at the potential of accidentally running into my adoptives, i didn’t really have the camera setup for high-speed snaps while moving on the first drive-by, and while i see now that those photos were easily correctable, i wasn’t confident of that at the time.
on the third drive-by, which was just after i met with Sherri briefly out at MacArthur Park, my adoptive father was home, standing in the window of the den (under the carport) and talking on the phone. in the space of a second or slightly more, i thought and re-thought about stopping approximately seven times, while simultaneously setting the camera down. i luckily managed not to rear-end a parked car on the side of the street and called it quits and went on back downtown to the Spouse-Unit .
it was just a brief glance, but it was far more disconcerting than seeing the commercialization of a formerly relatively open field. the image hasn’t been in my dreams as of yet, but i’m sure it will be soon enough