Isn't She Great (2000)

Actors

• Paul Benedict (actor)
• Peter Blaikie (actor)
• Larry Block (actor)
• Jean-Guy Bouchard (actor)
• James Brown (actor)
• Maurice Carlton (actor)
• Johnny Carson (actor)
• John Cleese (actor)
• David Costabile (actor)
• John Cunningham (actor)
• Charles S. Doucet (actor)
• Jack Eagle (actor)
• Clebert Ford (actor)
• Brett Gillen (actor)
• Carl Alacchi (actor)

Genres

• Biography
• Comedy
• Romance

Taglines:

Talent isn't everything.

Quotes:

[About a necklace]::Florence Maybelle: If a man ever bought that for me, not only would I have sex with him, but I would ENJOY it!

Jacqueline Susann: All I know about are people fucking their way to the movies, and popping pills and ending up in the gutter. All I know about are aging stars, hopeful whores, and cheap studs. All I know about are tits, ass, and the truth... and nobody writes books about that.

Irving Mansfield: Good luck. Keep it dirty!

Michael Hastings: Mimsy.::Jacqueline Susann: Mimsy? Is that code?

Jacqueline Susann: You're a tight-ass and a smart cookie, but are you my friend?

Henry Marcus: It's not a book anymore. It's a bestseller.

Saturday Night Live: The Best of Chris Rock (1999)

Actors

• Dana Carvey (actor)
• Dana Carvey (actor)
• Tom Davis (actor)
• Chris Farley (actor)
• Michael J. Fox (actor)
• Darrell Hammond (actor)
• Phil Hartman (actor)
• Phil Hartman (actor)
• Kyle MacLachlan (actor)
• Tim Meadows (actor)
• Tim Meadows (actor)
• Dennis Miller (actor)
• Dennis Miller (actor)
• Tracy Morgan (actor)
• Jim Breuer (actor)

Genres

• Comedy
• Documentary

Quotes:

B. Real: Yo! Hangin' out. You know, doing my beston. Got more bitches than Charleton Heston.

Chris Rock: It's sad that your taxes don't cover any medical. No medical. I think doctors make too much money, you know why? Because they don't cure anything. Everything they cured, they cured 50 years ago. They ain't cured anything in a long time, man, you know, diseases are piling up, man, we've cancer, sicacell, and Geri's Kids still limping around. Come on, Man, get rid of something. Some diseases, they just gave up on. They said: "To hell with it!" Like blindness. You go blind, they don't got nothing for you. You go to a doctor, tell him you're blind, he says, "Hey why don't you get this dog to drag your blind ass around." Where's the medicine? Where's the science? I'm blind! I can't see! There's people that can see that can't handle a dog! Come on, give me a midget or something!

Chris Rock: There's this big fuss about prison over crowding! Prison over crowding. I don't get it. I thought that was the whole idea of prison, a place for prisoners to feel uncomfortable. At my house we used to sleep four to a bed but we never tried to hang my father. Jails are so nice they go back twice. They don't have this problem in other countries. Nobody goes to Siberia twice. Nobody goes to Iran twice because it's hard to snatch another purse if you don't got another hand. It's pretty hard to lie to the judge with no tongue in your mouth! We're too nice to our criminals! Prisoners get three meals a day, homeless people don't get anything. That's messed up. I think criminals should get one meal a day: dinner. And not on a tray like normal people, they should put a cow in the courtyard and whatever happens, happens. You miss a meal go to deathrow and get the extra meat off the electric chair. I know that's harsh, but I hate the electric chair. Because electricity goes through there and electricity costs money, tax payers money! My $50! There are alot of cheap ways to kill someone. Like stabbing don't cost a damn thing. Get a stabbing chair. That's all I got to say, Man!::Kevin Nealon: Chris Rock, ladies and gentlemen.

Onski: Yo whassup? Whassup? Welcome to I'm Chillin'. I'm your host, Onski, and sittin' by my side is my real cool cat, he knows where it's at, he's my brother phat, my acrobat, my laundromat, my aristocrat, my diplomat, my place mat, my Gilligan's hat, my fire side chat, and he's all bizzat! B. Real!

[On the Bensonhurst Dating Game]::Stacey: Okay, number three, if I were a flavor of ice cream, what flavor would I be ancd what would you do with me?::Kevin Stubbs: You would be red raspberry and I'd lick you all over.::Andy Perotta: Excuse me, what did you just say?::Kevin Stubbs: I said what they said!::Andy Perotta: I heard what you said, I'm saying next time you better be a little smarter.::Kevin Stubbs: But I said what they said!::Andy Perotta: Use your head.

Nat X: My next guest starred in the TV movie of the week. Please welcome Tori Spelling. [Tori walks out on stage] Sit your rich white ass down!::Tori Spelling: Hi Nat. Good to be here. How are you?::Nat X: Look, don't come here kissing my behind. The only reason you here is because your daddy paid me okay? Now I saw your movie of the week.::Tori Spelling: Did you like it?::Nat X: Let me put it this way. I've seen better action in a Cambodian whorehouse.

Nat X: I'll beat your ass so bad you'll be the only guy in Heaven with a wheelchair.

Chris Rock: I was the only black kid in my grade. I felt like Franklin from The Charlie Brown Show. You've seen Franklin for 25 years and not one line! Nothing. Twenty five years! Everyone on Charlie Brown is their own character that's all thought out, you know, Linus got the blanket, Lucy's a bitch, Shroder plays the piano, Peppermint Patty's a lesbian. Everybody got their thing except Franklin. Come on, give him a Jamacian accent for something! Twenty five years man! They don't even invite him to the parties, but Snoopy's dancing his ass off. He's in the house, I don't believe it! Pig Pen's in the house! Pig Pen! I'm upset. I gotta go! I can't take this! That damn dog!

Onski: Now before I start the shizow, I say before I start the shizow, Iwanna say whassup to a new sponsor. That's right, it's time to say whassup to 'I Ain't Trying to Hear That', the home pregnancy test for men. That's right, it gives the man just enough tizime to get the hell out of town.

Wife: We closin' shop now right?::Old Ernie: Who said. I never said that.::Wife: You did, you mind changing, scheduel forgetting fool.::Old Ernie: Well tonight I wanna stay open you clock watching, early closing, lazy not working, back talking, [Wife agrees to close] you late staying, always agreeing, butt kissing, [Wife inquires as to when are they going to close] You when-are-we-gonna-close-up-and-go asking, turtle neck wearing, attitude giving, free loading, going in the back room, butt wiggling, not listening, you coming in from the back room box carrying, teeth sucking, head shaking, husband ignoring, you're not hearing me, isle reshelving, inventory taking, new price tag giving, thinking I was done but I'm not done because I'm still talking, I got more to say you head neck wearing, uh... Ozone destroying, um... [looks in dictionary] polar ice cap melting, earring wearing, walking out of my site, ducking down behind the damn thing, 38 Calibur Pistol shooting, pointing at me, [Wife fires] Husband shooting, mess making, [Wife fires again], two time shooting neither time fairly wounded. [Wife shoots again] Okay, let's close the store.