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I spent my whole life, up until 2008, being allergic to eggs. When I was like 4, I took an egg in my hand, crushed it – obviously just for fun – and got a rash all over my hand. When I was 8, my older brother was into raw egg shakes for some weird reason, and like an idiot he let me have some and I broke into a huge rash all over my torso.
My mom was always super careful about possible allergens because I had skin problems so at various times she wouldn’t let me eat seafood, dairy, peanuts, dogs, cats, you name it. But she would never believe me when I complained that mayonnaise would bother my throat. She just wrote me off like a bratty kid whining about something I didn’t want to eat. It was only much later, after at least a decade of stunted growth, crippling digestive problems and massacred brain cells that I learned that the mayo I kept eating indeed has eggs in it, so ha, Mom, it looks like I got the last laugh.
Fast forward to November 2008… it was the morning after Barack Obama was elected President of the United States, I was celebrating with breakfast at IHOP. Instead of my usual pancakes that I always get, I was in the mood for some hope and change, so I just decided to order a big-ass THREE-EGG OMELETTE. It was the most delicious thing I’d ever had, and I didn’t die. Barack Obama cured my allergy to eggs. Praise the Kenyan gods! And so now I’ve got a lifetime of artery-clogging eggy goodness to catch up on. Mmmmmmmm
Yeah I know that pancakes have eggs in them, shut up.
Hope you enjoyed today’s comic, see you next week, egg willing!!
As a reminder, as I said last week: I’ll be cooling it on the big time-traveling storyline for now, and going old school random for a while in order to get back on the comic horse. The storyline was obviously getting a bit too ambitious on both the plotting and art fronts for my own good, and was (not surprisingly) a major reason why I got all messed up and had to take a break again. In retrospect I shouldn’t have tried it in the first place, given my time constraints and my update schedule. But I hope to continue and finish it one day – hope hope – so those of you who were into it, sorry for now, but I’m willing to bet y’all will be happy with whatever has me making comics regularly again.
Comments on this comic (79)
RIGHT so here’s what’s going on
RIGHT so here’s what’s going on. It’s simple really, and pretty much goes without saying: there’s just been no time for me to focus on making aLp. Believe me, I’ve been trying to make some time, figuring I could at least crank out a new comic here and there for the sake of updating. That’s why I go so long without even an explanation – cuz I keep thinking I’m gonna update on a given week… but then that week flies by, and then the next, then the next, and suddenly it’s been months without a peep and then some of you guys start spreading rumors that I’ve died.
So it’s weird and backwards but basically I disappear for so long cuz I AM thinking about making new comics, not because I’m not. I just don’t wanna keep giving you empty promises, so I just end up sayin’ zip. The big problem is I’m shit at planning out what I’m gonna be able to accomplish in a given time period; it’s hard for me to give y’all meaningful info when I don’t even have it myself.
Anyway, I know what to say right now. I’m still gonna be too busy for the next few months to do new comics regularly, but I WILL try to do SOME. I’m just not gonna give you any false hope of some crazy renaissance from me in the near future. aLp continues to live on, sporadically. Hook yourself up to my Twitter, Facebook page, RSS, and email list, and you’ll get any new comics and blog updates from me, honest injun! That’s racist.
For what it’s worth, I do have a good reason to stay in the comics game, at the very least. The big (secret, ooh) thing that’s keeping me so flippin busy is indeed comics-related. You’ll hear all about it within the next few months. So, there’s that.
As always, THANK YOU, godammit, THANK YOU for caring. It’s EASY to have loyal fans when you’re Jeph Fuckin’ Jacques and you know, you update every day with awesome comics and live-streamed drawing sessions… but when you post 3 comics a year and disappear for months at a time like me, and still have fans as dedicated as you guys? That’s… that’s weird, you guys should get some help.
New York Movie Map: The Answers
First of all, thanks to everyone who enjoyed the New York Movie Map, spread the cheer around, and especially ordered one! It went gangbusters over the last week and took my site down three times with all the traffic, so, that was fun.
Hey order yours here wooo!
One thing that struck me while I was working on this thing was how often I’d see the World Trade Center pop up. It made sense, since a whopping 71 out of the 91 movies were released before 9/11, and showing the WTC was just a stock way of saying, “hey, we’re in New York now”. You can probably imagine, though, that each time I saw it I raised an eyebrow. Interestingly, there ain’t a lot of notable scenes that happen there (Snake Plisskin lands a glider on top of one of the towers in Escape from New York, and the 1976 King Kong climbs it, but I had fine alternatives for both), so it wasn’t that tough of a decision to leave the WTC off the map.
There was surprisingly little complaining about movies I screwed up or left out, so I’m pretty pleased with myself, but the most common gripe was that I left out the other boroughs and the upper part of Manhattan. Like I either half-assed it, forgot about, or wanted to take a dump on all the fine folks that don’t live in the exact epicenter of the universe. Look, I grew up in Queens, went to school on E. 94th, and lived out in Brooklyn so I know what it’s like to be neglected by pop media. And that’s just it – blame Hollywood, not me. These roughly 12 square miles of Manhattan is where THEY put everything. If I included all of NYC, or even just upper Manhattan, there’d be a ton of wasted space where relatively little’s happening and it’d reduce the impact. I had to make it work as a visual piece and not just as a reference. So it made sense to focus on where most of the action is concentrated. I don’t think anyone really needs to see it go all the way up to Inwood or down to *cough* Staten Island just for the sake.
I’m still going through all the answer submissions I’ve gotten over the last week; if you won you’ll be hearing from me by email within the next 2 days!
And with this, the submission deadline is over… because HEY LOOK THE ANSWERS…
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Schedule Say Relax
Hey everyone… sorry but I gotta slow down a bit again, if only temporarily. A lot of things are ramping up for me right now and I gotta be able to focus, or else I’ll screw all of it up. This dance probably looks familiar to you, but the difference this time is I still got plenty of comics in me, not to mention a storyline I’m dying to complete. HONEST!
You can expect new episodes “every 1-2 weeks” now… so this ain’t a hiatus, or the end. When I took breaks in the past I had doubts about the future of aLp, but not this time. aLp is gonna live on for a lot of reasons. I just need to lift the stress that my once-a-week deadline was strangling me with. Hope you guys can understand. As I said, I’m hoping this is temporary and I’ll get back to at least weekly eventually.
As usual, the best ways to catch all updates are: follow me on Twitter, join the mailing list, or become a fan of – oh sorry, “like” – the aLp Facebook page.
So as always, thanks for being super great and reading my comics… and SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!!
About this super time-travelin’ storyline
Hey, I wanted to say this about the current storyline if you haven’t heard me say it before… I KNOW IT’S TAKING FOREVER AND I’M SORRY YOU GUYS. I’m glad that most of you are enjoying it but I also know that there’s at least some of you who aren’t – maybe cuz it’s taking so long or maybe you just plain don’t like it.
I just wanted to try something new, y’know, and I’m pretty much happy with it, but still I do hate that it’s taking forever. The first problem, of course, is that I only have enough energy to do (almost) one update a week. On top of that, I’m trying not to let the jokes slip, and it’s hard to be funny and keep the story hummin’ along at the same time, with that one update a week. So, yeah, it does get to me when weeks go by and the story hasn’t budged much. But I’m trying not to let go of why you came here in the first place, which is for the yuks. I know you like the yuks.
So I’m gonna keep doin’ my best to make you all laugh and if it takes me another forever to finish telling the story I set out to tell, then sorry. I’m not gonna half-ass it cuz that’d be unfair to me and anyone invested in it. I just hope you’re diggin’ it… if you are, let me know so I don’t feel like I’m just a raving lunatic. And if you ain’t, well thanks for stickin’ with me for so long. I’ll just be here pluggin away the best I can.
THX GUYS I LUV U
Casting Call!
With the couple of Speed Dating strips I did a month ago and the print I recently re-mastered, an idea came up that I’ve been tossing around for a while… How would YOU like to star in your favorite aLp episode?
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If You See Something… Buy It
Hey, that new print that I debuted at MoCCA is now available for you at TopatoCo!
Based on this fan favorite episode, completely re-shot in super high-res and starring a real girl human (the lovely/talented/extremely dangerous Carly Monardo), this beauty is a generous 11″x17″, printed on super high quality paper and guys, it is gorgeous.
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YOU LUCKY BASTARDS
Here’s the 5 randomly selected winners of the recent contest! All of you lucky bastards will receive a copy of the new Sega/Rebellion Aliens vs. Predator video game for either the PS3 or Xbox 360, compliments of Sega:
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WIN A COPY OF AVP!
Contest time! This one’s a biggie. Sega’s given me 5 copies of the Aliens vs. Predator video game to give away – your choice of console (PS3 or Xbox 360… sorry, PC gamers)! Yo that’s a $59.99 value each.
Note: only US/Canada addresses are eligible to win the game, BUT you can still win an A<3P t-shirt if you’re not eligible. Details below.
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Jurybreak
I did get dismissed from jury duty last week after they interviewed me for 30 seconds, but after I’d sat there doing absolutely nothing for 12 hours over 2 days. I learned a lot of interesting stuff about the process from watching and listening to everything go down, and from all the folks who emailed or twittered their jury duty stories to me – thanks…
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From the dark depths of my kids’ imaginations
The scariest movie I’ve ever watched with my kids is, seriously, Finding Nemo. Yet it’s like Elaine just pulls random things from my horror movie collection for them when I’m not looking, judging from the drawings that come out of their imaginations.
The 5th picture below looked to me like some sort of H.R. Giger inspired Alien; thanks to reader Wendy for pointing out it’s a dead ringer for Onyx from Pokemon.
Happy Halloween! And let’s hope you don’t see my kids on the news tonight.
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