V-Men
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column curated by Mark Matousek
Last summer, when Eve Ensler asked me to write something about violence against women -- from a male perspective -- I went to my desk feeling skeptical, and not at all sure that I had anything significant to say on the subject. Although I had grown up in a house where female molestations of various kinds happened on a regular basis, and had spent a good deal of my adult life (and therapist's time) sorting through the emotional rubble left behind after witnessing so much misogynist violence, I felt doubtful that my experience mattered -- for the simple reason that I was a man -- compared to the traumas I had witnessed in the lives of my mother and sisters... more >
Kevin Powell
Joe Paterno, Herman Cain, Men, Sex, and Power
Joe Paterno. Herman Cain. Penn State football. Presidential campaigns. Men. Sex. Power. Women. Harassed. Children. Abused. These are some of the hash tags that have tweeted through my mind nonstop these past several days...more >
Vava Tampa
Why I Am A V-Man
Growing up, I do not recall having ever thought deeply about equality of the sexes. When friends ask why I work for Save the Congo, I have always responded that I became an activist by accident; and remained one out of necessity...more >
Mike Domitrz
Can I Kiss You?
One the second day of my sophomore year at Loyola University of Chicago, I returned from swim practice to find a note on the door to my room. It said, "CALL HOME. EMERGENCY." ...more >
Kevin Knight
A Brother's Story
It was the fall of my junior year in high school. My mom was picking me up from work. Only this time it wasn't just my mom. My dad and two sisters were there, too. As I got into the minivan I could sense the spirit of grief in their faces...more >
Dani Meier
Through a Father's Eyes
One autumn afternoon shortly after 9/11, as the nation struggled with cataclysm on an unthinkable scale, my darling daughter was assaulted outside her home in Minneapolis. She was in eighth grade...more >
Michael Kimmel
How a Boy Learns to be a Man: Three Moments
As someone who is both a researcher and an activist about masculinity issue, I’m often asked: where does it start? How does a boy learn all that stuff about masculinity? While these images surround us, bombard us, on a daily basis, it’s only through watching my son...more >
Yolo Akili
Healing Work: A Poetic Memoir
As a little boy I watched daily as the men in my life terrorized women through acts of control, aggression, and violence. These same men also worked hard to beat out of me any expression they deemed “feminine” and “weak.”...more >
Jared Miller
I Carry Her With Me
I’ve always been a fighter and protector at my core, and I cannot tolerate injustice of any kind towards a woman. Fortunately, I had a father that fostered that kind of character in me, which I am quite grateful for...more >
Taylor Krauss
Finding My Role
Rwanda has become my second home over the last few years. As a filmmaker I’ve been documenting the atrocities that have taken place in this part of the world – including the Democratic Republic of Congo....more >
Tom Antonek, P.H.D.
Breaking the Chain
I saw your face in the eyes of a patient today. She was describing a horrific history of sexual abuse – an event that occurred 30 years before – as if the violation had occurred moments before, curling herself in a fetal position in my office....more >
Marco Naguib, MD
For Mama
I hadn't been the first person to suggest that Mama leave Baba, my father and tormentor. On her wedding night, in a boarding house in Beiruit, Baba beat her for the first time. The landlady urged her to pack her things and go, as Mama wiped the running kohl off her face...more >
Derek Dujardin
A story from The MENding Monologues
For two years now, a group of extraordinary men and myself have been delving into the caves of our personal history to excavate stories of how the abuse inflicted on the women we have known has wounded us as men....more >
Rob Okun
The Vagina Monologues: A Wake Up Call For Men?
Will men ever "get it?" That's the thought that came to mind when the male owner of an Amherst, Massachusetts karate center spearheaded a drive in the local and national media to try and prevent female students from presenting The Vagina Monologues...more >
Bart Scott
The Love of Women
From the time I was a little boy I was taught to love and respect women. What choice did I have, being raised in an estrogen dominant atmosphere?...more >
Jimmie Briggs
Why I Go
I have written and re-written this letter since the day you were born because I knew that your arrival would change my world. Knowing that you are at home waiting for me, I'm sobered each time I board an airplane bound for a war zone...more >
Mark Matousek
Rescue
I grew up in estrogen overload, in a house filled with difficult women, the only son of a harridan who’d sent her husband—my father—packing for love of another married man....more >