Existentialist Gamer

Best. Film. Title. Ever. These are my thoughts as I look with joy at the tickets to Lesbian Vampire Killers clutched in my claw-like hands. Full disclosure: I know Matt Horne, so while I may be slightly biased, I did in fact enjoy Lez Vamp Killers. The super-secret-film-biz-people-only screening meant I was sitting amongst some of the most cynical people in the industry, and despite the fact most of them are cold husks of the people they used to be, soulless automatons desperately trying to claw their way into Cannes or Tribeca (the ones doing so bathing in the waters of glory, the others roaming the streets sorrowfully, devoid of a distributor), most of them did in fact laugh out loud (or LOL, as the internet would say) at the jokes in LVK.

The plot is a piss-take on your generic vampire story; vampires have taken over an isolated hamlet, and a descendant of a warrior must slay them to free the yadda yadda yadda. Thankfully Homosexual Blood-seeking-creature Slayers understands that this stuff will instantly bore even the most devoted vampire fanboy, so within the first five minutes we have half-naked lesbians making out, hilarious decapitations and of course the obligatory lesbian sex jokes.

While usually I dislike the generic piss-take film, Female-loving Blood-drinker Hunters manages to pull it off without resorting to the god-awful jokes you’d find in something like Epic Movie. While Corden plays the usual recently-fired-slacker, he does it with such a degree of charisma and acting that my cynical preconceptions evaporated within the first 20 minutes. Horne acts as the foil to Corden; the over-sensitive and polite guy being exploited by his girlfriend. The fact that he acts so meek at the start means his jokes at the end are all the more funnier.

Corden generally overshadows Horne comic-wise but in acting ability they’re about equal, and work well as a duo. The other actors, specifically MyAnna Buring and Paul McGann are competent, but never equal the main duo.

Not to say the entire film was great; it clearly is very, very low-budget. The scene in which Horne gets dumped appears to be have filmed in an empty wooden shed, the main cottage where they stay looks like its made out of cardboard, and all the forest sets look the same.

However, this is only noticeable when you look closely at the film. The direction pretty much covers it up well, with shots mainly being on the actors, and there are few static shots that are long enough to let one truly see the sets.

What the direction couldn’t cover up, however, is the awful special effects. Still, if you’re coming to a film called Lesbian Vampire Killers expecting something with the special effects of The Dark Knight, you should probably take a reality check.

No, these flaws are all acceptable, but the main problem is more evident; the script. It was perhaps a little under-developed. After the fourth scene of the two running through a forest being chased by (admittedly sexeh) vampires, I was starting to get a little bored. For me the first half was the best, where we still had the amusing dysfunctional relationship between Horne and his girlfriend, as well as the hilarious group of pretty-but-dumb art students. If they had perhaps fleshed the script out, and had the characters being picked off with more than just a few scenes in between, I would have been on the edge of my seat throughout, as it is I was entertained, but the ending just didn’t live up to the beginning.

In short, see it with friends, and don’t take it too seriously. As a light-hearted comedy, it’s great.