"...of men and women, of women and men...

...and that thought makes me smile again
because you and I are 99% alike,
you and I are 99% alike."

--Sherman Alexie from his poem "99% Alike."

I have just finished listening to Susan Faludi's book on CD, "The Power Dream." The book discusses the attacks on feminism after the 9-11 attacks, many MEN placing the blame on women for what happened because, as they allege, women have emasculated their men and thus made us innefectual in our roles as brave protectors. Susan goes through the history of this male fantasy of the male and female roles in American society, then tears them apart using such crazy things as...FACTS!

According to the American male fantasy of gender roles, men are to be the protectors of women and women are supposed to be the domestic fragile beings whose main desire is to have a male protector (pardon me, but I have to go vomit now... Back in a minute).

Daniel Boone, the American male fantasy man, was supposed to be a strong, powerful, all knowing, wise, male protector and provider figure, and his wife, Rebecca, was supposed to be the fragile damselle in distress unable to do much of anything other than cook, sew, and spread her legs for her man. In truth, Daniel was a failure in many things, killed (and regrettably so) only 3 Indians in his life, and though a good hunter, his wife, it is alleged, was even better. Daniel wasn't pleased to hear how his wife was put as least supporting actress to his lead in the story, but the authors of the fantasy didn't care. These were roles assigned to them, the reality (probably much more fascinating than the lies) was not conducive to the American male fantasy of the gender roles.

Hannah Dustin, a woman who was captured by the Abenaki Indians, escaped with her fellow captors by killing 10 Indians, 9 of which she killed; 2 men, 2 women, and six children. In more current efforts to bring her history the the forefront of brave historical women have been shot down repeatedly. However, a town just west of Portland, Oregon, is called Sheridan. It is named after Phil Sheridan, a well known white male American baby killin' machine who is said to have coined the phrase, "Kill the women and children first, they are easier to kill and it strikes terror into the hearts of the men." This genocidal maniac is celebrated annually with "Phil Sheridan Days." Phil is also in part responsible for the decimation of the buffalo. Why is Phil celebrated and Hannah not? Could it be because Phil has dangly bits while Hannah's bits are tucked away neatly inside? Can it be because Hannah doesn't fit her preconceived role as a woman?

Susan also talks about the Jessica Lynch fantasy, including the fantasy male rescue of said damselle in distress. When Bragg wrote his books about her, he made allegations that she was butt raped. Turns out to be a complete fabrication even with Jessica's own admissions. Jessica was asked about her admiration for her unit and if she thought they were heroes. She stated the person she admired most in her unit was Lori Piestewa, her Dine roommate and friend. She mentioned how in Iraq her humvee broke down and everyone in her unit just passed her by, except Lori, who picked her up. All the rest would have left her to die. Hows that for the American Male Fantasy of rescuing the damselle in distress. In reality, they could have cared less.

Let me tell you a personal story of bravery. Shusli and I went to one of the annual anti-war protests here in Portland several years ago. At the end, a large group of young folk were confronting the Cops who were dressed bravely in their military riot gear, creating anonymity for themselves, heavily armed, facing all these unarmed youth at the park in front of the federal building. Shusli, being the glorious anti-authoritarian that she is, drove the car around to the other side of the park and we joined in. I was scared at first. The Pigs had us surrounded and were all heavily armed and would definitely get away with any crimes they decided to commit against the people. Shusli did not drag me into this fracus, she lead me. She taught me bravery that day, a bravery I wasn't aware was within me. I have done some brave things in the past, but not face an immediate threat to my personal safety such as this. I did not feel emasculated by her bravery, I admired her bravery. I admired her as a human being and a WOMAN, and I stood beside her in the middle of a dangerous situation where many unarmed peacenecks faced a heavily armed military force ready and willing to silence them.

Part of the American Male Gender Fantasy is the RAPE FANTASY. Women have to be so vulnerable as to be regularly raped by non-American (non-white) males and thus their virtue also has to be protected by the white American male. Even historically this has been proven a fantasy. Heck, the reason why Hannah Dustin was captured was because her husband RAN OFF and abandoned her. Subsequent fantasies of Indian capture of women are that women in their fragility were supposed to be raped or forced married by we red nigger types. Oddly, however, none of this has ANY historically substantiated merit. All the FACTS state that no women were raped or FORCED to marry their red nigger captors. But the wild west fantasy of the Bush administration propagated (even using the alleged news and media conglomeates) that the masculine American Man is supposed to protect the fragile domestic American woman. Odd, because as posted previously, we all know that 30 Republican U.S. senators state it is fine for employees of corporations contracted by the government to rape women with impunity and not have to face any form of justice for their crimes. The recent gang rapes (one in California, one in Australia) many are blaming on the women victims for being promiscuous (or put whatever bullshit excuse you want to here). Men aren't responsible for their behavior (another excuse for bad male behavior, as Shusli pointed out, is that we can say we are only 12-years-old). Men in the military are regularly sexually harassing and raping their female comrads in arms. Men in the military raped Abeer al Janabe (13) and murdered her whole family. Obviously men aren't gonna protect women from rape, they're gonna rape them. Who are currently protecting women from rape? Other women. We as men have left it up to women to deal with our BULLSHIT BAD "I'M ONLY 12-YEARS-OLD" BEHAVIOR!

I have shown here that Shusli, my wife, is a powerful and brave woman. She is also vulnerable, sweet, kind, and amazing. She can be a fierce opponent if you confront her and try to tell her what she can and cannot do. I am brave, vulnerable, kind, etc., like Shusli, even more so because of Shusli, my wife. I am not her bodice ripping red nigger sex god protector, and she is not my fragile domestic red nigger wife. We are human beings together in a crazy and insane world who teach each other about life and live and love together and live and love life together. Mothers fight fiercely for their children. Men often turn and run, like Hannah Dustin's husband.

In Susan Faludi's "The Terror Dream," she also describes how men and women came together as human beings because of their mutual vulnerability. Shusli and I are powerful and vulnerable together as human beings who have chosen to walk through life together, who have chosen to stay and fight.

What I'd like to do here is open up a discussion about women and men, fantasy and reality.