In the weirdest news headline of the week country singer Shania Twain announced her engagement to Frederic Thiebaud.  Not that unusual, right?  Until you realize that Mr. Thiebaud is the ex-husband of the woman that Shania’s ex-husband, Mutt Lange, left her for.  Did you follow that?  Shania’s creepy ex cheated on her with Thiebaud’s ex wife Marie-Anne.  Seems Shania and Thiebaud fell into each others arms as their marriages dissolved, and now are blissfully engaged to tie the knot themselves.  I swear if I hadn’t read this on HuffPo I’d think it was a pitch for a new ABC series.  Surreal!  I wonder if the exes are invited to the wedding.

A Christmas carol from the Frogs:

O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
This year I can’t be bothered;
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
I really can’t be bothered;
Oh sure I’d like to have a tree,
But not without delivery.
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
I really can’t be bothered!

O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
You’re fresh but too expensive!
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
My search has been extensive!
From lot to lot I seek a tree,
that won’t increase my misery.
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
You’re just too damned much bother!

O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
Where shall I place these presents?
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
Where can I place these presents?
On a table or a chair,
It’s not the same though let’s be fair.
O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree!
You’re just too damned much bother!”

Just when you were about to start your New Year’s diet word comes from CBS that Al Qaeda is hatching a plot to poison your croutons.  I swear it’s either a slow news day or they are seriously making this up.  I think we’ve fallen into the paranoia abyss people.  You really should be more worried about U.S. corporations poisoning your food “by accident” as they’ve done numerous times in the last few years.  E. Coli, salmonella, and listeria have all been circulated by our Food Industrial Complex.  While the Food Safety Bill passed the Senate vote this past weekend, we’ve still got a long way to go before we are truly safe.  Besides, let’s face it if you’ve seen how fat Americans are becoming you already know we’re not eating salads.

Soldiers won’t be popping out of the proverbial closet any time soon.  You see, the Pentagon doesn’t want them shouting their now legally protected sexual orientation from the rooftops. According to Defense Secretary Gates they need time to create a deliberate process, and they must first conduct a study to determine that repealing the law won’t impair the ability of troops out there fighting.  While I don’t personally see how it could, I understand that at the end of the day the Pentagon is just playing for time.  Maybe they have a lawsuit up their sleeves or maybe the old generals just aren’t ready for the out and proud.  Or maybe, just maybe this is all simply political theater.  Time will tell.

House boos plan to work next week

Flesh-eating zombies hit Havana streets

Vending machine spits out gold bars and coins

70 Year Old Woman Robs Bank

And one really great quote:

Man if other democrats think you caved you really caved!

~ Seth Meyers, Saturday Night Live

This morning the Obama Administration is celebrating.  They’ve passed and extension of the Bush tax cuts.  So this holiday season you, the middle class,  will be able to ‘keep more of the money in your paychecks, and help the economic recovery to continue chugging along’.  Yes, once again middle class it falls to you to spend your hard earned dollars to keep corporate American in the black.  Can you do that?  Because God knows the wealthy don’t spend any of their tax break money.  They save it.  So really it’s up to you to rescue the sinking ship that is the American economy.  Better get back to work.

Sorry guys, I’m still buried under boxes.  Taking the day off to unpack.

Julian Assange?  Nope, this dweeb. Seriously Time?!

So I’m reading the news today and I’m fascinated by the emerging story of Julian Assange being offered bail by Michael Moore. A more unlikely pair of allies I can’t imagine. And Moore isn’t alone. Turns out there is a cadre of Brits ponying up to help foot the bill. Big names like socialite Jemima Khan.  You know, Hugh Grant’s ex.  So basically in the space of about a week Julian Assange has gone from being the most wanted man in the world to a cause celebre.  Kind of like Haiti.

I’m thinking that a major motion picture can’t be far behind, so I started casting it in my head.  The part of Julian Assange will be played by Alexander Skarsgard of True Blood.  Michael Moore will be played by Kevin Smith of course.  And Jemima Khan?  Well Julia Roberts resurrect her Charlie Wilson’s War look, and do it in her sleep.  What do you think?