Kate de Brito
Monday, August 16, 2010 at 08:05am
Dear Bossy: I’m at work and should be doing work so my email will be short. My question is that why do asian men do so badly with anglo saxon women, ( i never use the term white people as I personally think it sounds really racially charged).
My back ground, I am an asian male, early 30s, Pretty much born here, I currently have a wonderful anglo saxon girlfriend, we get along really well.
I have dated both asian, european and anglo saxon women and to be honest, every person is different in some way, so I never say, “I only date women from country X”. I will give every one a chance.
I see some of my asian male friends who would love to have a non-asian girlfriend but they get absolutely no where. On there other hand i see almost every one of my asian female friends go out with non asian guys.
When I talk to my non asian female friends some say, they would never date an asian guy, while some say its all in the eyes of the beholder and they would consider them, which is good, but they never seem to.
Now, back to me, I am in no way trying to blow my own trumpet, I know what I am and I know what Im not, I am rather fortunate I did a stint of modelling in a previous lifetime, I have a personality that is not very asian, and I am quite a charming character, and also I do look a little mixed, although Im not.
I believe these characteristics have allowed me to ‘have a chance with non-asian women”. Anyway, that aside, I honestly do feel very sorry for my male friends and other people who ive met who come here or are here, and would like to experience a relationship with a non-asian woman, but many end up disappointed.
On the other hand, the girls seem to hook up so quickly, and end up getting visas here or just end up with a non-asian, even though many of the realitonships are short/bad/violent or are pretty weak.
So anglo saxon/european ladies out there!!! Why do you not give people like my friends a shot????
I would like honest answers so I can understand. And before people say, “oh maybe your friends are all losers”, that is quite possibly true, (I am not sure because I have never considered them as potential partners) but I see it everywhere I go, so its not an isolated situation.
And also for those people that are going to say “I will give anyone a chance, regardless of race” which I think is FANTASTIC, I also think the same, so how come I don’t really see these chances occuring at all”.
Now, please don’t misunderstand the tone of this email. It is not bitterness or anger or pessimism or playing the victim. I am in a very fortunate position in many aspects, and I know that many of my friends are quite jealous of me, and we do get quite a bit of stares when we are out in public purely for the fact that asian man with non-asian woman is so uncommon, yet the other way around is everywhere. I would just like to know everyones opinion, and I feel that slightly sexist/racist comments/politically incorrect comments can come out better on an anonymous forum.
I have a few theories and beliefs which are not limited to:
Does black hair turn you off??????
Is it because there is a view (true or not) that asian men can’t speak very good English?
Is it because they are generally shorter then non-asian men?
Do they look geeky to you?
Is it because many of them spend a lot of time indoors and are paler in colour?
Is it because on average they don’t drink/socialise as much?
Are they too sophisticated for you?
Are you worried about what others will think about you?
Do you think that because they are so different that they won’t be able to interact socially with your exiting friends?
Will your family/friends disapprove?
From a very happy but curious Asian Man
Bossy says: First, there are obviously “Anglo” women interested in Asian men otherwise you wouldn’t be going out with one. Why doesn’t it happen more? I suspect it’s simply that most people are attracted to what they know. Unless you interact socially with people from Asian cultures regularly you could make the mistake of thinking you have very little in common.
It’s pretty natural human behaviour to try to group or categorise people. This sort of shorthand is lazy and often harmless but it can mean we don’t get to know people on an individual basis. And while often these judgements are made with no intent to harm they can also be the point where racism begins.
Language difficulties do play a big part. When someone speaks a different language it can be an automatic assumption they also think differently to us. It creates barriers between people.
This is not just about Asian cultures. In her book Almost French, Australian writer Sarah Turnbull writes about her life in Paris and bemoans the fact her lesser grasp of French leaves her boyfriend’s friends with the impression she is stupid or slow.
So yes, language can be a barrier if some of your friends are not fluent in English and the girls they approach don’t speak their language. At the very least it can make it more difficult to find connections and common ground.
I suspect things are changing. In another couple of generations relationships between Anglo women and Asian men will be far more common simply because of our increasing enmeshment with Asia and its cultures. The unknown will become more everyday.
As to your specific questions:
Shortness is probably not a general reason to avoid whole race of men. Women are attracted to short French men after all.
Black hair? A bit of a non issue. Many western men have black hair too.
Geeky? Asian men don’t necessarily look geeky - unless they are.
Indoors? Do they spend a lot of time indoors? I didn’t know.
Socialisation? I suspect you’re getting closer to the mark when you talk about socialisation. If Asian guys socialise mainly with other Asian guys or Asian women or if they are not out much then this is going to limit contact with Anglo women.
Sophistication? I don’t think Asian men are necessarily more sophisticated. Some women may even consider them more naive.
.
Issues of prejudice would be specific to families. Mine wouldn’t have had a problem, but having said, that I still never brought an Asian guy home.
I expect other bloggers will have their own opinions to add to this today.
All the best
PS. Your email wasn’t that short.
Network Highlights:
311 Comments
Its really simple. I guess this will sound totally racist, but I cannot help who Im attracted to. I do not find Asian people sexually attractive in any way. That includes male and female.
Most non Asian woman I know will say the same of Asian men, whereas most non Asian men find Asian woman hot.
Yes this is generalising, but its true of almost my entire my social circle.
That said, one of my closest friends loves asian men with a passion. They just need to find the right girl. Good luck to them.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:13am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (11:04am)
There’s nothing wrong with saying you’re not attracted to any group of people. Why are we being so piss weak and politically correct when we a speaking the truth?
I’m not attracted to Asian women, I’m not attracted to Black women. I tend to like Brown eyed women more than blue eyed.
I’m not being racist when I say these things at all.
For example.
Here is a nasty racist comment;
“Slopeheads should not go to the same schools as our white kids”
Can’t you see the difference?
This PC bullshit has to stop, if you aren’t attracted to asians then it’s ok to say it. It’s not inciting hatred, it’s a simple statement of fact that doesn’t in anyway vilify anyone.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:16pm)
Toatally agree. I have quite a few asian male friends, and whilst they are attractive, I am simply not attracted to them. Nothing personal. I like men who are taller then me and well built. Asian men tend to be about the same kind of hight (and I am pretty average hight as an anglo-saxon woman), and have a more ‘wirey’ built. Alot of people find this attracive, and it is, but it isn’t what I am attracted too.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:56pm)
The only reason I was being PC is that I’ve been told I’m a closet racist for my attraction before.
So dont tell many people as a result.
Agree on black women, black men however, woah :D
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:00pm)
I agree with shane, theres completely 2 different things, Racial AND otherwise, there is no fine line between racism and life.
“Panthers Give bad head”
“Asians should fuckoff back to their own country!”
See the difference ?
Opinions contained in this post do not necessarily reflect the opinions of “BroG”. This post is for the exclusive use of the addressee and should not be disseminated further or copied without permission of the sender. If you have received this message in error, please immediately notify the sender and delete the message from your computer.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:53pm)
Absolutely agree, Shane.
I am not attracted to Asian women, but then, I’m not really attracted to blonde Anglo women either. I like Brunettes and redheads - doesn’t mean I have anything against blondes. Or Asians. I just like who I like.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (03:10pm)
Shane - you are the king!! Can you run for PM please?
Mon 16 Aug 10 (07:00pm)
I hate to agree with this but I rarely find myself attracted to Asian men - it does happen but not as often as to Caucasians/Indians. I have no idea why this is. I’d be open to dating an Asian guy though if I found him attractive and we got on well. Oddly though I don’t really have any Asian guy friends, but loads of Asian female friends. I have no idea why this is...sorry. But I’ve noticed the phenomenon you mention as well, there seem to be more Asian girls with non-Asian guys than vice-versa.
Tue 17 Aug 10 (01:05am)
Well speaking from experience. I find Asian men attractive.
The reason anglo saxon women are not attracted to Asian men has nothing to do with anything the OP mentioned.
It actually has to do with the Asian mother, who will become the “boss” and “rule-the-roost” if marriage ever eventuated. In a nutshell it is culture.
Mainly, in anglo-saxon culture a couple get married and move off to start their own family, this is not so in Asian culture. In Asian culture the wife comes under the dominance of the mother-in-law and frankly, it ain’t fun or pretty. It basically isn’t a big attraction!
Tue 17 Aug 10 (01:05am)
Well speaking from experience. I find Asian men attractive.
The reason anglo saxon women are not attracted to Asian men has nothing to do with anything the OP mentioned.
It actually has to do with the Asian mother, who will become the “boss” and “rule-the-roost” if marriage ever eventuated. In a nutshell it is culture.
Mainly, in anglo-saxon culture a couple get married and move off to start their own family, this is not so in Asian culture. In Asian culture the wife comes under the dominance of the mother-in-law and frankly, it ain’t fun or pretty. It basically isn’t a big attraction!
Tue 17 Aug 10 (12:09pm)
Agree with you Shane. In the same way that being anything but 50-50 bisexual is not sexist!
Tue 17 Aug 10 (02:02pm)
I don’t find Asian men attractive, it’s as simple as that. Most of the ones I’ve seen smoke and that’s a deal breaker for me. Plus I’m not really exposed to Asian men, so I’ve never been able to get to know them. They usually stick to their own kind and it’s rare that I’ve seen them in mixed company. I have this thing against short guys as well. I’m 5’ 7” (170 cms) so I wouldn’t date a man shorter than me, no matter what his race. Call it bigotry if you like, but I like what I like and I can’t change my tastes for anyone.
So it’s not just me :O My preferences are based on stereotypes though. In my eyes asian’s look ‘weaker’ and ‘smaller’. With gender stereotypes, asian girls are cute and weak and some guys dig the cute/weak type. It’s more acceptable for girls to be cute/weak. However with some girls, they want to date strong powerful tall men. Asian dudes tend not to give off the same ‘strong and protective’ aura from what I’ve seen in my limited experience.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:15am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:11pm)
I totally agree with you that asian guys look smaller and whatnot. But I LOVE them. They are suuuuper hot. I really like the feminine characteristics and delicate features that asian men have. But they usually have very prominent adam’s apples which also rocks my world lol. I’m white and big into my yellow fellas.
So there you go OP give your friends my number and I’ll be in there like swimwear.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (03:15pm)
Most asian men are not masculine enough for me. Not that I go for massive boofheads, but I do like tall man with broad sholders, a masculine face and a nice patch of chest hair. Asian men tend not to have many/any of these qualities…
Asian women on the other hand a very feminine - tiny, dainty and soft spoken, which is way Western men like them.
So, I think it comes done to the fact that Asian men are generally not very “masculine” while Asian women are very “feminine”.
Tue 17 Aug 10 (05:26am)
Agree with Thrall. Asian girls are usually cute and petite, many guys like that. Asian guys usually aren’t tall enough for me. Surprised nobody has mentioned the rumour that asian men are not well endowed? That might play on my mind if I was “picking up” for a test drive, even if I realise it is probably a wild generalisation.
In saying this I definitely have found a few asian guys attractive, but they were either half cast or born over this side of the world usually.
Tue 17 Aug 10 (10:41am)
Thrall, I think you’ve hit the nail on the head with gender.
Genderwise, I feel like I walk the line between masculine and feminine. Physically, I’m just as cute/weak as an Asian girl but I have a very strong masculine personality. For that reason, I look for a man who can overcompensate and make me feel like the soft little petal....Or at the least, be my equal.
Unfortunately, a typical Asian guy doesn’t fulfill that requirement for me, having grown up in Australian society where masculinity has a pretty firm definition.
To put it another way, I feel more feminine standing in Orgrimmar than Silvermoon.
Tue 17 Aug 10 (10:50am)
I agree it’s a perception thing - I personally (female perspective) like guys who are bigger / stronger than me - could be the celtic genes springing out there.
However I did once know a guy from the US, we were discussing this (sort of) and he said he liked “demure” women, which most Americans weren’t (his words). I asked if that meant quiet, keeping their opinions to themselves, does “women’s work”, etc and he said yes, that was correct. He didn’t like “white” women because they tended to be outspoken, independent, confident and willing to go for what they wanted, rather than put up with crap from anyone.
The whole “feminine” look lends itself to not only the small / dainty / sweet look, but the perception that those women will embrace the caretaker / nurturer role, rather than be a confident outspoken woman.
The reverse is also true - the perception of male Asians is that they require their women to be like that, and as I’m not, I’d need to get to know the guy as a friend first, get to know HIS personality, to get past that perception.
Tue 17 Aug 10 (10:12pm)
I completely agree, most women like myself like men that appear to be sturdy and strong and can kick some butt for them (if the need arises), Asian men just don’t seem to fit the bill. Whereas I think Asian women are adorable, and can see why men like them.
Alglo Saxon isn’t a racially charged statement? Go study some history old boy, you’ll find that it is completely racially charged.
Apart from that, perhaps it’s because Asian men have a reputatuion for having little dicks? I dunno, perhaps some of the white women will be able to say. I don’t know if they will give you more than platutudes, but we’ll have to wait and see.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:19am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (10:44am)
nice and direct!
Mon 16 Aug 10 (11:11am)
Sorry OP, I cant help you except to say that perhaps your huge ego and rampant self promotion makes your friends feel unworthy in your presence, therefore they come across as wimps??
Nothing personal bud but you did a whole lotta talking yourself up there; just sayin
Mon 16 Aug 10 (11:39am)
I would have to say that the wee willy thing is what stops me from being attracted to asian men. I did see a really attractive asian man at the train station once but thought of downstairs and that was enough for me to look the other way.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:08pm)
Asian people are generally smaller. Which means both male and female are assumed to be smaller in the pants region. Therefore white women think they won’t have enough there to satisfy them and White men think they will be like superman compared to what the Asian lady has had in the sack previously.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:31pm)
I’m Anglo, and from personal experience, asian guys and the small ‘member’ stereotype is false..
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:50pm)
What about the reputation (and I don’t know how deserved it is) that certain cultures are more likely to ‘do it Greek’ ... and that is kinda interesting for some people. I remember reading advice on such activities as a form of contraception in a main-stream newspaper when in Asia…
Mon 16 Aug 10 (03:19pm)
I’m a 30 something “whitey” seeing man with an asian background and he most definitely does not have a small dick…
Tue 17 Aug 10 (09:31am)
It’s quite sad that there’s such a generalisation, however true it may be. You should see the looks my asian boyfriend gets when he asks for a size 11 shoe.
Tue 17 Aug 10 (10:04am)
Ah but Shane the same camments about ‘member size’ has been said about white guys that only date Asian girls....
Hi, Im at work, so i actually will keep this short. I have been out with Asian, Caucasian and Latino men. I have to say, personally (and generally), i find Asians a little harder to get along with - possibly due to their culture and way they have been raised. On the other hand, my close friend will only go out with Asian guys and he is caucasian.... I really think its, as the saying goes “whatever floats your boat”
Cheers, gotta go work
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:22am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:34pm)
I think you’re on the right track with culture here. A few random points that spring to mind:
1) Many Asian cultures (especially Chinese / Japanese) are strongly patriarchal and Western women don’t like being told what to do. On the flip side, Asian women who’ve come from a patriarchal family background like the more easygoing Western blokes.
2) In Thailand (not sure if this is true elsewhere in southeast Asia) there’s a relatively large percentage of gay / trans men, leading to more competition among the women and less among the straight men. Western guys who would never get anywhere with our picky, demanding Western women actually get propositioned over there. Contrariwise, Thai guys who are used to having it handed to them on a platter will struggle to meet Western women.
3) Western culture generally holds the typical Scandinavian appearance (tall, slim, light coloured eyes/hair) as a beauty ideal, so you’re out of luck. On the other hand Asian women often have slim figures which is attractive compared to the larger builds of most Western women.
It ain’t fair but your friends have a lot stacked against them. Tell them not to give up, though - it does happen. Heck, my brother-in-law-to-be is a Singaporean-Australian.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:06pm)
Hahaha ..... LOVE IT
Nice HE only goes out with asian guys,
Homosexuality now we’re talking a whole other kettle of fish, Firstly, how many ladyboys are asian. not all obviously but cmon its suge a huge thing in asia for some reason.
Secondly then theres the fact as mentioned that asians have small (female Like) frames so its like dating a girl but you can still be gay when doing it
..
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:34pm)
I agree! Im Aussie and I dated an Asian guy for 3 years and I swear I’ll never do it again. I’m not meaning to generalize but from my experience the culture difference was HUGE. He was born here and raised here and I still found the culture difference to be massive and hard to understand from both sides. Not to mention his parents HATED Australians and wanted nothing to do with them (yet they live here. Here’s a tip for them - fuk off) so that made it all very very hard. At the time I vowed I would only date Asians until I got amongst them, never again (based on my experience!). I’ll stick to my gorgeous Aussie thanks.
To be brutally honest, a small small percentage of white girls would be attracted to Asians. There is nothing appealing about them whatsoever, in my now learned opinion
Wed 18 Aug 10 (01:59am)
@ Chihuahua:
You’ve dated one Asian guy, had a bad experience, and are now proclaiming that there is nothing appealing about Asians?
Your ex = all Asians? That’s some ignorance right there.
First I kind got over this entire topic after reading you talk so highly of yourself. Whilst you don’t see many Asian men with Anglo/Saxon European women, that does not mean it doesn’t exist. Everyone no matter who they are has characteristics they like in a prospective partner, perhaps yours simply doesn’t fit in with what they want.
It has nothing to do with sophistication or even an image for that matter. It has to do with things like social groups that people have been exposed too and their experiences, not an image your portray.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:23am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:04pm)
Sokrates he has a point though.
In Melbourne you see Asian chicks with white guys all the time but I honestly can’t remember ever seeing an Asian man with a white girl.
Op,
To be blunt I just don’t find Asian men sexually attractive. If however I met an Asian guy whom I liked and thought was attractive then I would have no issue dating him.
Look, I’m a guy so I can’t really give you an exact answer, but I’m commenting anyway because I sat up all damn night, and now morning awaiting this blog, and what a disappointment it was. No interesting stories for me to vent my life’s frustration.
Anyway, moving onto you, champ. Why do women not date asian guys? Well, honestly I think it applies to every race. How many white women do you see with black men? How many black women do you see with white men
See where I’m going here?
Interracial relationships aren’t that common.
Not that there is or isn’t anything wrong with dating someone of a different skin color, I don’t give a damn what color, size shape or whatever form your skin is. However, I guess most people are attracted to their own race, without sounding racist there. 
When you’re out in the city and you see the lovey dovey couples holding hands, kissing romantically at federation square, heads on each others shoulder with that smirk of happiness..
I want you to look at how many of the people are in interracial relationships. I would say not many. So don’t feel bad. Just get your friends to keep chasing. 
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:25am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (10:54am)
You are the most uninformed individual in the universe. You really are. You have about all the human life experience of a potato.
Sincerely
Mon 16 Aug 10 (11:42am)
Ha ha, I was wondering when someone was going to do that.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:02pm)
Dr. Opkick. This is the best response i have seen to this idiot. I think you have really mastered the use of emoticons
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:09pm)
What you talking ‘bout Willis? Black guys are hot…
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:11pm)
Oh man is he annoying!!
The emoticons are so frustrating 
as soon as I see them 
I know who it is 
so i just skip him now. 
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:13pm)
Yep Opkick, Caps same drivel, but atleast i can rebuttle to this one.
What a load of trash. as mentioned by people many times, the asian/white thing is huge, honestly not so much with an asian guy but definately asian girls with white guys.
Man .. How many kiwi’s are with aussies omfg .. I dont think its so big now but maybe 10years ago it was kewl to be black, the whole rap phase. Everyone likes black guys for a tonn of reasons and likely for the opposite reason they DONT like asian guys (small willy wonkas) and they say the african americans are huge…
It appears your a self anylising 18yr old cappy, use your anylitical powers out in the real world cappy, interacial relationships are everywhere. Australia, New zealand, england, america.
Maybe cap should find a blog more suited to his age, im thinking dolly doctor if that thing is still around and if they have a blog. it used to be big with my gf in highschool, prolly no longer exists.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (03:15pm)
^ emoticon cake taken.
Tue 17 Aug 10 (12:06pm)
@Captain Shit Talker
You, Sir, are a douche. You simply dribble on about things you clearly have no understanding of. And instead of having the intellectual ability to convey meaning through words, you bombard everyone with your msn nonsense.
And perhaps, as suggested, you should find a forum more suited to your age and limited vocabulary.
Try Twitter. The venue for a nobody to obtain momentary granduer by gathering an entourage of complete strangers, whilst labouring under the misconception that people give a shit.
If racial sterotypes have taught me anything it’s because they have small penises.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:28am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (10:38am)
Yeah that’s one stereotype the OP didn’t include - small penises.
Although my friend dated a Filipino boy and she said his was like a baby’s arm holding an apple....
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:11pm)
Trust me, stereotypes are not always spot on.
One of the smallest penises I have ever seen belonged to a strapping black guy.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:13pm)
that’s funny you mention that Deja Vu because i dated a Filipino guy for a few months and he had a VERY small penis…
I’m guessing you are Filipino and were just trying to separate Filipinos from this common stereotype of Asian men.
good attempt but it came off quite obvious and now probably embarrassing.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (04:58pm)
That must have been disappointing Fostie!
Tue 17 Aug 10 (10:16am)
Hahahahaha thats funny because it was exactly what i was thinking…
On a serious note I used to work for a Japanese company and there were a few eye candies floating about. So I dont think that all white chiks are not attracted to Asian guys. In fact I know one single white female who really wants to land a Asian guy!
Tue 17 Aug 10 (10:21am)
My thoughts exactly....
Tue 17 Aug 10 (12:30pm)
@devils_advocate, I was shattered! ha ha
@chikamoca, maybe all your story proves is that every person is made differently regardless of race?
Tue 17 Aug 10 (03:56pm)
Of all the black men in the world I could have had sex with, I got one with a small dick....I feel your pain Fostie .... or not as it seems!
Wed 18 Aug 10 (10:12am)
Haha Chikamoca, um no I’m not Filipino. Funny how you read all that into a harmless comment about some random dude my friend dated who had a massive wang. You’re weird.
All I can tell you, CAM, is that I simply don’t find Asian men attractive. I have some wonderful male Asian friends. The features I think are attractive in Asian women I also notice in Asian men… and I don’t like those features in men. What can I say, I like my men blokey, and I’m yet to find an Asian man that I would consider fits that bill.
In any case, hoorah for you for having model-quality looks, an absolutely fabulous personality, and being the object of envy for your friends.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:30am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (10:33am)
I think you hit it on the head here miss A (that also applies to pointing out how ridiculous and up himself this guy is).
I too am a fan of blokey blokes as it were. For the most part, asian features tend towards soft and delicate, which lends a level of androgyny that women with a ‘bloke’ on mind just aren’t attracted to -think ‘lady-boys’ that you just can’t quite work out.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (10:34am)
Hoorah!
In my experience, there is often a cultural attitude from Asian men that can be very offputting. It’s more prevalent in those who didn’t grow up here though. They can come across as superior and judgemental.
Also, physically they are smaller (by this I mean leaner, not shorter) and less hairy, which makes them more feminine (and us girls feel more masculine).
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:30am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:42pm)
I agree totally. Im my relationship with an Asian he always tried to make me feel that Aussies were nothing but bogans and that Asians were the superior ones. And this was coming from someone who was born here. Worst relationship of my life!
Tue 17 Aug 10 (04:00pm)
I have more body hair than most Asian men. Not that I’m into hairy bears, but I prefer to be the more feminine one thanks. And just far to mincey for my liking.
I agree with you Chihuahua. I used to work with foreign students and true or not, I always felt like they thought I was of inferior ‘stock’.
as an asian man growing up and schooling in australia i wonder the same question?? white girl love islander boys whether fijian, tongan and aborigines but asian boy will be the last on the list.... still wonder????????
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:31am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (11:33am)
See above few comments, a lot of us girls love blokey guys, I don’t like pretty boys, I lurve manly men, big, broad, and scruffy looking (not unwashed but like they haven’t shaved in a couple of days and shabby chic hair)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:09pm)
Seriously? Its all just a matter of choice, I would much rather an asian man over a fijian or tongan. (never dated an aboriginal guy)
And people the word is caucasian for a white person.
PS for the record I love geeks
Tue 17 Aug 10 (11:51pm)
To DJ and anglo chicks,
Based on wat u said so all you girls like Kingkong then
My Wifes Asian
Could it be the age old truth of unequiped nether regions on asians ?
You hit a heap of info in your finishing that i never heard before yet left out the above ?
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:31am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:27pm)
Your wifes asian what?
Or did you mean;
“My Wife is Asian” which could be written as “My wife’s Asian”
Shane the grammar police
Wed 18 Aug 10 (02:08am)
BroG, perhaps it’s because not everyone thinks about Asian penis quite as much as you do - since you seem to mention it in every single post here.
I am an anglo female in my late twenties. I think it mainly has to do with attraction. It is not that complex i think. Personally speaking I am not attracted to Asian men, its not rocket science. If i was brought up in Asia, obviously i would be attracted to Asian men. I think it has to do with asian men’s height, appearance, build, and stature which are not generally very masculine. No offence.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:32am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:20pm)
as an Asian male who was born in Melbourne, I might as well shoot myself.
I have no attraction to Asian women because they all remind me of my sisters.
Due to the fact i was brought up in Australia i am more attracted to a blonde, blue-eyed lass than an Asian woman.
I really have no hope in finding MY dreamboat do i?
Mon 16 Aug 10 (06:31pm)
I have an Asian mate who is a bodybuilder and is massive.
He can get any white chick he wants!
Just get in the gym mate!
Tue 17 Aug 10 (07:35pm)
not a chance royboy, unless you buy yourself one
I don’t have an opinion.
Race isn’t an issue for me - I fall for whomever I fall for.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:39am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (11:02am)
I agree with this. I don’t know why I’m seeing so many “I don’t find X race attractive,” surely it’s not that blanket?
I find SOME white men attractive, I find SOME Asian men attractive, I find SOME (insert ethnic/cultural background here) attractive. There is no formula, no overall, it’s just about the individual preferences and who you meet. *shrug*
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:15pm)
Gwen, for me it is that ‘blanket’ in 28 years I have not met/seen one full asian guy that I have found attractive.
I have male Asian friends so have nothing against them personally, it just is what it is.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:59pm)
For a lot of people, it really is that “blanket”. I just dont find them sexually attractive in any way, regardless of personality. Sexual attrction is a requirement for me to hook up with someone so it never happens
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:02pm)
I agree. Race is not an issue.
My husband was born in Vietnam, but has spent more than 1/2 his life in Australia - he is more Aussie than Asian as a person.
To me I don’t look at him and see an asian guy- I never have and never will. I look at him and see a wonderful man and father.
Yes there are issues with his family in terms of culture/language etc, but I love him for ewho he is, not for his family.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:22pm)
I dont think its entirely a blanket but i think it is fairly general, as many have mentioned they’r more feminine, however i totally agree, you dont choose who you fall in love with they’r just stating uptill this point they havent found anyone of that race attractive.
All that aside whats the bet Jet Li gets lovin frequently enough
Uh..... I thought they wern’t a popular dating alternative cause they generally have a shortage in the pants side of things....? Personally I find the guy who plays Hiro on Heroes and Llyod in ‘Get smart’ to be quite cute and funny, he’s asian..... but i don’t wanna shag him. Just not attracted...It’s not like I’ve met many asian men socially though....
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:48am)
I am an anglo-saxon female and I have been dating a half asian guy for over a year now. I think alot of asian guys are pretty cute. I like that, is his name Ahn Do?
Shortness? i am short, so its not an issue
Black hair? asians arent the only ones in the world with dark hair.
Geeky? I hate geeky sorts, but there are geeks in every culture.
Indoors? like Bossy i didnt know this either.
Socialisation? Im not a fan of big drinkers i like to stay in.
Sophistication?? why is it every other culture seems to think that Aussie girls/guys have no class whatsoever and we are all just a bunch of bogans?
Family Approval? mine is fine with it.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:55am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (10:50am)
unfortunately when you do go to other countries us aussies do come across as bogans with no class...sad sterotype but true I am afraid
Mon 16 Aug 10 (11:36am)
Id rather the Aussie Bogan stereotype to the Asian short appendage stereotype
Mon 16 Aug 10 (12:08pm)
Hey SS,
I’m with you on Ahn Do, he’s hot as!
But I don’t find majority of Asian guys I see attractive.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (07:18pm)
I think Ahn Do’s fantastic too. You know how we always say we want a partner with a great sense of humour - I wonder if he’s so hot because we *know* he’s got a great sense of humour??
Cheers,
Tue 17 Aug 10 (02:45pm)
Judy, he’s easy on the eye because of those gorgeous arms of his and that cheeky smile.
But the sense of humour makes him a definite keeper.
Wed 18 Aug 10 (09:00am)
Mistress D, I agree that not all are hot, but when i do find an attractive one, I cant stop staring!
Ahn Do is lovely! and everyone loves a guy with a sense of humor!
an mick, Now that i think about it, I would probably prefer to be an aussie bogan than any other stereotype i can think of!
OP,
Don’t love or try to solve your mates problems. Let them figure out how to play starfish with anglo chicks.
I’ve never had any issues. I’ve never had any issues picking up European, African-American, Kiwi, Irish, English, Danish or Russian chicks.
I’ve never nuded up with an Asian girl though…
OP, any idea why I’ve never picked up an Asian chick?
Please help…
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:57am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (01:21pm)
I hope you keep your door locked when you ‘’with these women’’ so your mum doesnt walk in and catch you with your hand on it.
I am half asian. I have a French girlfriend, and really enjoyed the book “almost French”.
As to why Asian men don’t get the non Asian girls. Alot of it has to do with confidence. They’re not confident/assertive. Girls generally don’t do the chasing. So if the guys don’t chase, then those guys are going to miss out.
Non Asian guys will chase any girl they like (White/Asian/other), whereas Asian guys are comfortable in their own race/culture, but will rarely chase outside of their own culture. How do you expect them to be appealing to a girl?
Mon 16 Aug 10 (08:58am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (10:41am)
Good point.... I have had a few asian guys want to go out with me in my younger days, and it was almost like being back in high school.
I prefer a guy to tell me they’d like to get to know me pretty soon into a friendship ie letting me know they’re interested. I havent met an asian man who was interested in me who has done that.
Something doesn’t click here.
You say you think all people are different but want to date (or your friends do) according to race.
Huh?
Don’t worry about it so much. I know plenty of women that say they would never date an Asian man because they don’t find them attractive. I know some guys who say they would never date an Asian woman because they don’t find them attractive.
It all washes out in the end
Mon 16 Aug 10 (09:07am)
I’m an anglo female and am often attracted to Asian males. Actually, more often than not I’d pick an asian male over an anglo male.
So, trust me we’re out there!!
Mon 16 Aug 10 (09:08am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (11:13am)
so am i, i bet these guys are just to shy or assume that we arnt out there and therefore have already given up
Mon 16 Aug 10 (11:59am)
cant believe it took me half a page to find other girls who like asian men!
my sister has dated asians, ive dated asians, i have quite a few friends in marriages & relationships that are asian male & anglo female as well as vice versa.
It’s like men saying they prefer blondes or brunettes (a topic that seems to be able to go for hours), I don’t think there’s anything specific across the board, it’s just preference.
I’d think its just that many white girls are profiling asian guys as having some the traits you’ve said. They will need to talk to the girls and show them that they’re different (assuming they are actually outgoing, confident, strong willed men). While they’re at it, they should also convince the girls’ friends as selection is often done by consensus.
Any type of guy that’s not having success with women should work on himself. I’m a slim guy and need to spend time on the weights to not look scrawny. I make sure I wear well fitted fashionable clothes. Most of all, I’ve socialised myself to the point where I can be the life of the party to show women my personality and let them choose if they’d want to take things further (on the priviso they pass my own screening requirements).
If I was going to give your friends some advice, I’d tell them to work on their game, drop their limiting beliefs and show the girls exactly why they stand out from the crowd.
Mon 16 Aug 10 (09:08am)
Mon 16 Aug 10 (10:48am)
While I think its great that you’ve tried to change yourself to improve your chances with women, how much of that is changing who you are as a person?
Would you change back once you’ve met the woman you’re looking for?
Mon 16 Aug 10 (11:29am)
No. I’ll agree that the process starts out as ‘I’ll do this to attract women’, but then you realise that you enjoy being fit, strong social and confident. You enjoy your role as a masculine man within society and your relationships and you change permanently.
Real change doesn’t start without a catalyst. For me that was a genuine desire to attract beautiful women and it ended up changing me into a better man. I would never change back because my motivation for being like this comes from within now and not out of a desire to impress girls.