Standing or sitting. What’s the right way for men to take a leak?

Me too. I usually sit down simply because I can. Especially at home where I can pick up the Economist and read an article. Stand up in public toilets though and leave the loo to people who need it.

Do you guys wipe your vaginas afterwards too ?

In my experience bossy ive found alot of women do not know this, Guys dont wipe, they shake (EVEN THEN THEY DONT MISS THE BOWL...)

But i was refering to these supposed males and their vaginas

Besides, sitting down is more hygienic than standing..

I disagree with you on that.

Particularly given that most urinals have automatic flushers now.

So, when a guy uses a urinal, we touch our own zip and, well… us. But we’re touching the shaft, not where the urine comes out. So, provided you’re a reasonably clean person (shower every day, not too sweaty etc.), that’s it.

If you sit down, then you have to touch the cubicle door handle/lock (which everyone else has touched AFTER doing number 1 and 2, you touch the toilet seat, toilet paper dispenser, the flush button and the handle again. More surfaces = greater risk of bacteria transfer.

------

Now, here’s a question for any nurses, doctors or microbiologists out there: If you’re using a urinal, you’re really only touching yourself. So, is it more hygenic or less hygenic to wash your hands afterwards, given you have to touch the common taps and use an air-blown hand dryer?

If you wanted to get into, AL, there are more bacteria on the taps, airblower push buttons and door handles than on you.  Which is why I hate using airblowers over paper towel, since you can us the paper to turn off the tap and open the door on your way out.  In some US airports their absolutely bloody fanatical about hygeine - soap dispenser, faucet and airblower were all operated by censor.  Except that once again there was no paper towel to open the damn door with for the grubs who don’t bother to wash their hands at all >.<

I’m just assuming your over the age of 5 here but correct me if i’m wrong. How is it you have not mastered the dark arts of having the sharpei? If you can’t take a piss without hitting the bowl or at least have the skills to right your name on a secluded alleyway wall on a drunken Saturday night then YOUR DOING IT WRONG! The other reason guys stand in public toilets is that you don’t know who or what manner of filth has used the toilet before you or when it last saw the toilet duck army.

Signed
Conrod
The Sharpei Sharpshooter

OMG I HAVR TO TOTALLY AGREE WITH THIS ONE!!!!!
It’s absolutely disgusting getting hot and heavy with your partner, ripping off their pants and getting that smell!!! Seriously, if you want us to do things with that thing, keep it clean!!! How would you like that smell creeping out of somewhere you’re supposed to “get creative” with!

If you ‘get piss all over the seat, floor and your hands’ just because you’re standing up, I’d hazard you’re probably doing something wrong.

Me, I tend to swing both ways.  Sometimes a few minutes sitting down is all the rest I get in a day.  So I’ll take it where I can get it.  Other times, a quick in-and-out is required, so standing is the order of the day.

But its definitely a rare occasion that I walk out covered in, and smelling like, piss.

I dont really care i dont know any of you and i really dont want to judge, BUT.. Seriously this is impossible to do.

Urinating on target is not rocket surgery. How can you not manage this simple task yet manage something more difficult like keeping dribble in your mouth or shoe laces are difficult too.

If you wanna piss sitting down then go for it, if you dont care about your friends,girlfriend,family,anything at all then fuckit do what you want but seriously i CANNOT understand how its so hard .. having said that ive been to many urinals with the floor coated in urine how attractive you mustnt be the only ones and in this case i wish they would. Either that or have some control over their orifices..

Having said all that mines so big i can leave the head in the bowl while i hangout outside the cubicle
Wwewt

Agree with Kursed - as a woman, nothing worse than the pants coming off and getting the urine smell....
Eiiiiiiwwwwwwwww!!!!

Sometimes after sex is i sit.....I suppose wou would actually have to have sex to know that though Ty.

Stand-up, get piss all over the seat, floor and your hands

To quote from Steve Jobs (about the new iPhone): You’re holding it wrong....

Kursed & Been There Done That;

seems like your experiences come down to the guy not waiting for the shake and then dribbling in his undies in which case standing or sitting is not going to make any difference

To those saying i’m doing it wrong:

Ask your partner, girlfriend, wife, whatever if you’ve ever got piss on the bowl, seat, whatever and I bet they will admit you have.

Either way, i’m not so much talking about the piss itself, and i’m not so much talking about always, and i’m not so much talking about only public toilets, i’m talking about (and point me out if you think i’m wrong):

- The shake, good luck gauranteeing with 100% clarity that you won’t get piss on places other than the toilet bowl.
If you think you’ve never shaken piss anywhere but the loo, you’re a liar.

- If you’re standing up, usually you have pants, boxers, undies, whatever on (which sometimes restricts the flow). Sometimes this “holds off” some of your pee. You won’t realise it until you’re finished, and zipped back up, and you “release” a small amount of your piss in your own pants that you missed.
If you say this has never happened, you’re a liar.

- Sometimes if you’re busting, you don’t have time to carefully hold it in and adjust your aim accordingly until you’re ready. Down goes the fly and away you go. In these circumstances the furst burst might go anywhere.
Again, if you say this has never happened, you’re a liar.

People go on and on about standing up being manly and any other way being gay. Yet most of the people saying this, regularly get piss everywhere, let their partners put up with the smell and the wet patch on the undies, and don’t wash their hands after they have just put their hand on their c*ck and pissed everywhere.

I gaurantee, 80% of men don’t wash their hands...AT ALL.

Real manly.

Surprised no-one has commented on the musty smell of a fanny that hasn’t been wiped properly. It;s equally as gross to go down on.

I know I’ve heard stories of girls who just give it a shake.

Yuck on both fronts.

That’s not all the time, but being un-circumcised, you’d be surprised how much it happens.

Being un-circumcised, let me introduce you to this special technique that I developed when I was about 5 years old: Pull your foreskin back, just enough that it’s not covering your urethra.  Then when you pee it comes out in a neat, aimable stream without the splatter you’re talking about.

Then, once you’re not routinely covering your junk and your hands with pee, washing your hands is much more optional. I still do it, but out of habit rather than because I got covered in pee.

And peeing standing up IS about being manly. Part of being a man is striving to achieve mastery of yourself and your environment. Learn to pee properly. It’s worth it.

Exactly, If he cant control his piss and it goes everywhere and he doesnt know how to fix this problem then stuff like how to wink, walk, talk should be even more difficult.

I think you might be wrong about it only firing when aimed.... Otherwise how would you do both?

It is friday afternoon and i am slightly switched off at this point but i’m just not picking up what you’re putting down?

Same same!

Personally, I like men who dont need to conform to society expectations.... nothing worse than people saying “its a bit girly” then complain when their guy doesnt open up about his feelings.
Also, I’d rather not know what my bf does in the loo.... my ex used to leave the door open

Never agree’d with 2 women more, these people have vaginas. (The OP that is) i assume marissa and kitty do too

Toilet lid down is a must!! For girls and guys! Can’t stand walking into a bathroom and seeing a toilet bowl (but appreciate that this is my own neurosis - one that I like indulged in my own home)

Please do put it down!

I was brought up that everyone in the family should put the lid down after use (to trap the spray and germs).

And if the loo is in the bathroom, not to keep tooth brushes near the toilet.

Hi PP, in our house we always put the lid down, cos then no matter who’s using the loo, they have to lift and replace on thing or another. Solves all arguments. Plus it stops all the yukkiness spraying out of the loo when you flush it, spreading loo germs

Hi PP, in our house we always put the lid down, cos then no matter who’s using the loo, they have to lift and replace on thing or another. Solves all arguments. Plus it stops all the yukkiness spraying out of the loo when you flush it, spreading loo germs

I agree, I’ve always been “Considerate to the females of the household” however i believe the same if it was an all male house, i often find it funny that SOME women want only the 1st seat down so its ready for them, i would think the whole thing down would be the point of it, hygeine wise aswell as to help block any smells.
ALL OR NOTHING BIATCHES!

The lid must stay down when the toilet is not being used in our house because we have a long drop composting toilet, which does not work correctly if the lid is up. After using it for six months, I have to say I quite dislike flush toilets now. They seem so filthy and stanky by comparison. Our composting toilet doesn’t smell at all, even when one is doing a number 2. I know my other half sits down to use it mostly, because it’s nicer than standing up and looking down the hole..

In our house, the lid goes down. It’s hygienic and means both the man and I each have to raise and lower something, thus solving any arguments.

When we have visitors I get irrationally grumpy if the lid doesn’t get put down. Graw!

Hear Hear. Finally, hope of a man who actually uses the convenient dunny roll to clean up spillage....

And OP, whatever feels more comfy is what you should do.

Women would stand to pee if they could - but they’d also wash their hands WAY more often afterwards than most men do - so the convenience factor is worth considering.

I hope the mixed reactions you get dont leave you peed off.... 

While i agree, i would hate others standing/seeing my piss more than the people standing in it/seeing it, ITS NOT HARD TO PISS IN THE BOWL!
Your so lazy or unclean if you cant, i mean what GROT do you have on your dick that makes you constantly shoot off target ?

Awww, Having the drunken sway just adds to the fun! hitting a moving target is way more fun and being drunk only further makes it better

Q. What’s the correct way to hold my coffe cup?

A. The “right-way” up so that you don’t pour out all the coffee. The handle should be held to the side (left or right) but never facing the drinker or on the opposite side to the drinker. If your cup has two handles, then both should be gripped. If your cup has no handles, then you should grip the cup firmly, but not too firmly as you don’t want to crush it. Pretend it is a penis (for determining the firmness required to hold it, but you may not want to picture that image as you drink from it).

Q. Which hand should I use to answer the phone?

A. Your “free” hand or it they are both free (and you don’t have a hands-free phone), then the hand that is closest to the phone.  If you don’t have a tape measure handy, use your right hand as your default hand.

Q. Should I use a black or blue pen today?

A. Depends upon what you are writing. If you are writing a serious document, then use a black pen. If you are writing a school paper then use a blue pen. In either instance, I would recommend typing the document instead of using a pen. Using a green pen should be avoided except in emergencies and a red pen should only be used for making corrections or writing poems about how wonderful Edward Cullen is.

Q. Should I keep my Vegemite in the fridge or pantry?

A. The pantry. It’s too hard if you keep it in the fridge and it will tear your bread (toasted or untoasted) when you try to “spread” it. If you like eating your vegemite off the spoon, then you should store it in the fridge as it makes for better spooning.

Alternatively, I think Yahoo Answers has appropriate responses for all these questions. You could also check there.

Vegemite should definitely go in the pantry mate.

Vegemite belongs in the fridge.

Well it is Friday....

1. Dont drink Cofee.
2. DO NOT answer the phone
3. Useage of pens is so 2009
4. Pantry (One of the rare things like this that belong there)

As CAL says there is no “Right” answer, That being so all toilets should be unisex and girls should be made to pee standing up at the trough

I tested this once. It definitely keeps longer in the fridge.

I agree, it’s got to be the pantry.
I’ve never once had a jar of Vegemite “go off” from not being stored in the fridge, and lord knows it can take me a few years to finish a jar.

Thanks for all your help, I’ll sleep easier tonight with those tricky questions answered…

Theres nothing more foul than morons that cant control their c..k..

That’s got my vote for tshirt of the day....

you don’t have s3x very often I take it, because post coitus if I am standing up to chuck a p1ss it will spray EVERYWHERE.
If I am at a girls house for a one night stand and I don’t care if I see her again I don’t bother cleaning it up.
But otherwise I’ll make sure I take a seat to p1ss.

Yeah but are the cubicals really any better?

As part of my job I have to ensure the cleaning standards are up to scratch. part of this includes the lovely job of checking the state of the men’s toilets. It’s fricken gross! And this is in a corporate environment!

Urinals are a hundred percent better. Faster, no touching of toilet seats, no need to aim anywhere near as well......I don’t go in there to admire the decor, I get my piss done ,then piss off!

Not really, but when other men relax at the urinals and other “body functions” occur - I do not want to be standing next to them.

so don’t sit in the urinal then…

FFS you are only pissing in it, get over yourself!

I remember reading a story about a urinal maker who was painting a pretend fly onto the centre of the urinal and then baking it into the porcelain, pureley to give guys a target and reduce splash over.

I think they considered just painting a bullseye but a pretend fly was considered a more irresistable target by the punters (or pissers).

Me too!! I don’t care if the seat is left up or not, I figure it actually takes more effort to lift it up then put it down, so whats the big problem with leaving it up?

Although I grew up in a house where the boys put the seat down, so when I see a seat up, I think “Nawww. So rare” for some reason…

Exactly, i dont care (im male fyi) i do think its more hygenic to be closed and i would like it all down, but for the women that jump up and down about just the 1st seat down (not lid) is just crazy and makes me think well.. why are you so royal the toilet should be in perfect readiness and why not in perfect readiness for me ? having said that .. all down all the time.

I think it’s about what you’re used to. When I was sharing a house, I didn’t mind up or down, but when I had a house all to myself, I got into the habit of night time excursions in the dark. When my bf would stay over, I’d end up sitting on either the rim or the lid, which is not the most pleasant experience, and I’m generally to groggy in the night to remember to change my habits.

“He obviously is a very good aim because he never wees on the seat and we never have to argue”
News for you lady! he is pissing in the sink and just flushes toilet on the way out! Also he is not modest, he is small dicked thus his boy shyness in the mens room.
Also what is it with chicks that dribble on the seat and don’t clean it up, you never hear of these stories do you!

Sorry Fek, but not everyone wants to see or share their dicks with other men this practice is most certainly gay, footballers like doing this and its why they are all closet cases.

Theres a newsflash for ya,
You most likely are homosexual.