Dear Bossy: I’ve recently discovered your blog and have found it very insightful and an overall pleasure to read. Briefly about myself before we get the ball rolling. I’m male, 19 going on 20 this year, studying full time university with a healthy social life, not over the top, not into dance raves and night clubs, but the occasional drink down at the local with my mates. I live with my parents. I work casual at our local Myer, and tutor Chemistry to VCE students for a bit of extra cash. I’m heavily involved in my studies and absolutely love it. I was brought up with a lot of the old conservative beliefs, not religious per se, but old fashioned values, this will become relevant in due course.
In April an old friend (who we’ll call Emily) of 13 years arranged a lunch for Good Friday, yum cha kind of thing, and invited a mutual friend and my best mate (who we’ll call Jack). All was good, and going out with these guys has been enjoyable in the past. Emily decides to alter our plans slightly and go to a comedy festival gig before lunch, which sounded quite pleasant, but she was skimp on details. Consequently she had also invited a uni friend of hers, who is quite pleasant and I’ve met before. On our way to this comedy I was largely very hungry (large appetite you see, breakfast doesn’t cut it by 10:30, being 6"3 and all), but also inquisitive to what the gig was, and who was going to be there. I’m the type of person who likes to know what is happening, otherwise I get anxious and a bit tetchy.
Emily was aforementioned skimp with details, however on numerous occasions she said she’d checked the internet, the newspaper and heard it on the radio. We get to the event a bit early, so to tide the munchies, we went to a 7-Eleven for a snack, I decided not to, I was too much into a big yum cha feast. So waiting in line, we were surprisingly first in queue, and as time approached 12, a lot of some would say ‘alternatives’ or ‘indies’ were there, with what some would say an odd dress sense, distinct hair styles, and clear political beliefs one would describe as liberalist or Greenie views, you can just tell. Emily too holds said views and often we’ve been at logger heads when in discussion.
I was at this stage somewhat startled by the presence of these ‘alternatives’. Emily knowing my propensity to speak my mind, attempted to censor me, by saying I wasn’t to offend anyone. I was deeply offended by such a comment, but laughed because it was very funny, and present company also found it amusing. I was offended because she didn’t respect or trust me enough to be tactful with my remarks. Emily was very concerned with how these ‘indies’ viewed her, and keeping company with the ‘enemy to social progression’ was a no no. So whilst waiting in line, an indie was handing leaflets, with a picture of Jesus on the crucifix with the pop culture phrase ‘lol’ next to it.
I didn’t say anything at the time, for fear of causing a scene for Emily. It was in poor taste given it was Good Friday. It was the start of a poor mood that only escalated. So to carry on, 12pm and we are lead into this hall filled with seats and a small stage set up, little to be known this was a Triple J, live radio broadcast, that was slated to go for 3 HOURS!! Boy was I mightily ticked off when I found that one out. I was visibly fuming, fidgeting, constantly looking at the time, and reading the news on my phone. I directed a lot of anger at Emily, I began to believe that she knew full well this was going to happen, given she’d looked at no less then 3 media outlets about this very gig.
One of the comedians clearly pandering to the audience of Triple J, the indie/alternative crowd, started making fun of Tony Abbott, who I particularly like as politicians come. Making an issue of his choice to wear speedos, he is after all a surf lifesaver volunteer, and his devout Catholic beliefs. It was just in poor taste and I was rather frustrated. During the ad break, I pointed directly at Emily and said to her ‘You’ve tricked me!’ The show progressed and I’d resolved to stay for the 3 hours, let us not forget my unrelenting hunger, which added to my bad mood. I was reading my phone, I’d become disinterested and disengaged at this point, and Emily had sent me a text “Stop looking at your phone, and being a sop.”
I looked at her after that and she said and I quote “Leave, nobody wants you here.” That was the tip of the iceberg, I said goodbye to Jack and Emily’s friend and wished them a happy Easter. I felt tremendously hurt by what she had said, a friend for such a long time, having the gall to throw that in my face like that. I’ve always had issues with friends and trust, it was the one area I was vulnerable to attack. Few experiences in school left me difficult to trust people, hence an inability to make many close friends.
I walked out of the hall, fuming, but self contained until I got outside and I could talk to myself about it all. I’d resolved that Emily was in the wrong, and went home.
On the next day, I was still in a state, so I wrote in my blog about the event, and this allowed me to vent. Afterwards I felt resolved with the situation, and decided to not be in contact with Emily for awhile, I was convinced she lied to me, which to this day I still believe. Please note I did give my friends false names for the sake of privacy.
Following my advertisement of my blog on Facebook, I have a quite a fan base to which enjoy my rants and comments of politics and pop culture. Emily read said blog entry and felt all flustered and annoyed, that she had to send me an email. In brief she explains how I made her feel small, and she was the victim. I very much beg to differ, and continued to rationally explain my point of view. She proceeded to use foul language and claim innocence, so I simply said to her “I think this will take some time to get over. I think we’ll leave it at that”. Over the years I have noted that Emily dislikes coming to terms with her mistakes, and attempts to blame others, and this scenario supported that observation.
At this stage I have to give more back story. November of last year, I met Jack’s 2 mates from high school, as we’d gone to separate schools. I found that I got along fantastically with these guys, and today I consider them my close mates. In the past I was never one for groups of mates in high school, I was to steadfast into my work, and any attempts never ended pleasantly, so it was all new to me to have a successful group of mates. Emily too had been acquainted with these guys, but found that she had to tell me how she disliked them (when on many occasions she professed to enjoy their company as well), which I found off putting given I rather enjoyed their company. I eventually told these guys how Emily felt, which set them both off her, and they began to dislike her, as they’d too considered her a good friend of theirs. This goes to my traditional beliefs of loyalty to ones mates, and that you don’t talk like that about mates.
Some may say she was confiding in me, but she had no right to dump this on me. Our relationship has been patchy, after primary school, we’d not been in contact, for a number of years until seeing each other at one of Jack’s family dinners. Few years later, she and I shared a bus to our respective universities. We’d gotten to know each other and discover we hold polar views, which never got between us before the Good Friday incident.
So a few months after Good Friday, a silly prank on facebook, on thing lead to another, and we’d offended Emily, she’d found out that I’d told D and R, that she’d ‘dissed’ them. Prior to this, I hadn’t seen her on our shared bus and it was clear she was avoiding me. Following this facebook thing, out of the blue she’d confronted me about it and Good Friday on the bus. She came and sat next to me and started crying, showing me facebook upon her phone. After a lengthy conversation, she wanted me to apologise, after she had apologised, and I objected, feeling I’d done little wrong.
She wanted me to take down my blog, I figured it had some relation to Gossip Girl, a show she likes. Upon the arrival at my stop, I wished her good day and haven’t seen or heard from her since. I admitted that the facebook thing was immature, but it happens, further more to the testament Emily is incapable of accepting the consequences of her decisions.
Middle of the following week, my mother receives a phone call from Emily’s mother, who has always been fond of myself, she’s known me since I was young. She was claiming that Emily was threatening suicide, feeling ill, crying in the night, and blamed it all on me and my blog. This was quite the moral dilemma. I gave the reassurance to Emily’s mother that we could talk in the evening when I got home from university, it’s the least I could do. Emily’s mother was very impartial, was happy to listen to everything I had to say, and I was more then willing to show her my blog article which I forwarded to her, Emily’s mother believed what I and my mates were doing was ‘cyber bullying’ and warned that she will call the authorities.
I explained the situation to her in it’s entirety, believe me there is a lot more I can add to this letter. I explained how I was fine for things to just lull in the ‘friendship’ until the wounds were healed. Emily however tried to patch things too early, and now all is silent.
Finally after all my story telling, I’d like to know what can be done to reopen the lines of communication. We have known each other for some time and it would be a pity to have the friendship end on such poor terms. My mates dislike her for more reasons then I’ve explained, but as I say it would be a pity to lose an otherwise good friend.
Many thanks,
Young Conservative
Bossy says: You had a “moral” dilemma about whether to pull down a blog you knew had injured and hurt a friend? Where is the dilemma? Pull it down.
There is so much he said/she said in your story it’s hard to know where to begin but I’ll start by saying when problems like this arise it is always unwise to imagine they are all the fault of someone else. If you truly want good friendships and good relationships in life, if you want to get along and be successful and happy if you want self growth and understanding, sometimes you also need to look at your own actions. You need to see the things you accuse others of… “not coming to terms with her mistakes, attempts to blame others,” etc are often the things we struggle with ourselves.
As an example you accuse Emily of disloyalty by bitching about this new group of mates. You proclaim your own belief in loyalty. Yet you went behind her back and told these people what she had said about them. How loyal is that? There is hardly ever a motivation for spreading the bad words of someone else to others.
But all of this is essentially sidebar, except in as much that you have very strongly presented a case why you are blameless in this whole sorry saga. Unfortuanetyl right or wrong has very little to do with genuine friendship. You see we can often look at a the way friends behave and think they should have done it differently. We can judge ourselves well and them harshly. We can always see our own perspective and fail to see theirs. This is good at making you feel justified in your feelings but not so good in supporting friendship.
If you have struggled with friendships in the past it may be you need to see being right all the time is not really supportive of having good mates.
Your question is how do you open the lines of communication. And it’s pretty simple really. You aplogise.
If you really want to be friends and you value the friendship ring her and say, “I’m sorry about everything that’s happend. I’m not sure how helpful it will be for us to go over what happened but I do want to say I am sorry for hurting you, the whole thing got out of hand. I was techy that day and hungry and I expected something different. I don’t want to lose you as a frined. Can I take you out for a drink or coffee?
That’s what you do. Whether you will do it is a different matter.
Network Highlights:
181 Comments
Spell Check! ASAP
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:14am)
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:28pm)
I’ve heard being a vegetarian can upset your stomach
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:42pm)
Kate,
I’ve tried to use spinach for experiments before (I’m a plant pathologist) and the amount of bacteria that grew on it after a day in a humidity chamber revolted me! It literally oozed slime (the ‘sterile’ controls, not just my inoculated leaves). So YES, I would say it is very likely that you can get food poisoning from spinach!
Fri 02 Jul 10 (01:00pm)
Never mind the spell check, I think I fell asleep in the second papagraph.
Blah, blah, blah, boring.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (01:01pm)
If you eat spinach you deserve to get sick. Stop being a wuss Kate, go ghet yourself a pie, ckocky donut and a coke.
I’m sorry! And now the punishment...reading the other 60 comments waiting to be opening no doubt saying the same thing. I think I have food poisoning. Can you get it from dirty spinach?
i should Shane, nice sterile processed food
thanks nas that makes me feel even worse
Kate de Brito
Fri 02 Jul 10 (01:08pm)
What...the...f*ck?
Was your tirade a uni-test to see how patient people are, or how much torture they could put up with before they lost the plot?
You should leave Uni now, because you’re an idiot. An idiot with a big vocabulary who feels like making an essay out of the most trivial sh*t.
You’re a judgemental little sh*t who has no life experience on anything but your own biased views.
You’re a concieted, hyporcritical and insufferable wart on society. If you weren’t so full of yourself I would be able to understand how you sleep at night.
You probably count people you dislike as others count sheep to get to sleep.
You probably look in the mirror and say to yourself. F*ck i’m good, just ask me.
You’ve got tickets on yourself, tickets noone wants to buy. I’m surprised your mates even put up with you.
You’re probably a joke to them, that idiot joker in highscool that everyone likes because they are such a d*ckhead that it makes for funny situations because they are so highly strung and usually create an altercation.
I wonder if you actually learn anything at uni, or you see it as a confirmation or re-affirmation of what you already know.
Cuber Bullying or Telling it like it is?
Well i’m telling you that you need to be taken down a peg or two.
I hope someone you really idolise and look up to tells you how much of f*cking wanker you are.
Idiot.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:16am)
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:11am)
I think you could have condensed all this to calling the OP “lol sensitive”, and the sentiment would have been the same. But at least it’s a shared sentiment…
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:42am)
bit harsh tybalt…
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:42am)
I’d like to point out to the OP that “telling it like it is” is really no more than “telling it like I think it is” and - shock horror- we as individuals are often wrong.
You and Emily both sound immature. If she is upset about your blog and your actions to the point of being suicidal why not just apologise. It’s not that hard. You don’t even have to be wrong to do it.
Small but effective gesture, I frequently apologise to people when I think I’m right, it’s manipulative of me I know but it gets the job done.
My final advice OP is to stop thinking so freaking much. Exercise more and try to have more sex. Then you won’t need to worry about what you eat and get so hungry and cranky.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:43am)
Well said!
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:48am)
Here, here.
Couldn’t have been said better.
Well done, Tybalt.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:48am)
Hear hear Tybalt!
Seriously OP, WTF.
Get over yourself. Go get some yum cha and shed your tears over your dim sims and go blog about it later.
You really are a joke - your friends probably keep you around because it makes them feel better about their existence.
Instead of being a pussy, maybe if you were a real man and just spoke to your friend about your issue you would’ve solved a lot of your problems. I can’t believe you bitched about her to your “mates” and told them she doesn’t like them.
You’re a man bitch...the worst kind of bitch!
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:54am)
Three cheers Tybalt, I couldn’t agree with you more.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (11:07am)
Now now, OP might not have a large vocabulary, they might have a Thesaurus (pesky know-it-all dinosaur)
Personally I enjoyed the entire letter. The smell of self importance is strong in this one, he and the successful doctor could get it together and have children who they could train to carry mirrors so their parents never need look at anything but their own reflection.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (11:17am)
oh. my. god
most awesome post ever, Tybalt. ever.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (11:59am)
So you realised you were at an event you didn’t like. But you stayed to be difficult and cause a rucus.
I think as Tybalt said, very trivial.
Just root her, and move on mate. It’s easy to see you’ve got the hots for her. But if your conservative and she is greenie self righteous, isn’t going to happen mate.
Fap to some of her FB pics and move on to find your conservative soulmate.
PS. Dont write so much next time, I think you like the sound of your own writings too much.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:05pm)
What Tybalt said. The OP is a clown.. and incredibly annoying.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:07pm)
You’re a judgemental little sh*t who has no life experience on anything but your own biased views.
Ummmmmm.....kettle?? Pot????
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:38pm)
Hear Hear. It’s idiots like this who will join the Young Liberals and go onto a career in politics or law and make decisions affecting society while remaining out of touch with it.
He tries to cover up his emotional immaturity with a big vocabulary and faulty logic.
Weak.
Get off your high horse and treat your friends how they should be treated; with respect. If you think they’re disrespecting you, stop being friends with them. Simple.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:53pm)
Just what did they do to earn your aimless, senseless, and ironically extremely idiotic hatred?
Unless I’m missing something, I don’t see what awful bad thing this person has done. They don’t specify what the prank is, or what was written in the blog post, but you assume it must be something horrible, based on the view of one party.
A 19 year old wanting to kill themselves over something written on Facebook clearly has a long list of personal issues. Could whatever this guy did be horrible? Sure, but you don’t fucking know, yet here you are spewing the rather limited list of childish insults you can think of at them.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (01:05pm)
I heart you Tybalt. Wanna have cyberbabies?
I don’t think you were bullying as you were just venting your frustration at being extra hungry, and rightly so. I become a cranky bum when hungry too, but sometimes, you just have to go with the flow. You had the opportunity to eat some crap at 7 eleven, but were eyeing the yum cha, again, rightly so. 7 eleven has crap for food.
I just think sometimes plans change and you need to go with the flow and enjoy what you are doing at the moment rather than fantasise about what could have been. And why would you want to upset a friend you have known for 13 years over something so silly?
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:18am)
Fri 02 Jul 10 (11:11am)
Hold on. The OP is an incredibly uptight, conservative and socially awkward creature who probably should go to a rave or two and do what certain people do there to loosen himself up a bit and become a little more human. ‘Alternatives’? Oooh how unpleasant. Hilarious. However, he was quite deliberately misled and lied to by Emily, whose Green-Left ‘I’m so fucking cool and progressive and saving whales all over the place’ air of superiority reeks to high heaven even from here, and had to endure three hours of puerile JJJ humour whilst starving. So they both have problems and should come down off their high horses. And quite frankly learn not to be such fucking drama queens. Just sayin’.
You forgot spellcheck, haha sorry had to say it after you’ll get a million of the same message
All im curious about, is that really how you type before spellcheck??
Also, Emily sounds like a bitch, If she knows you are religious and took you to something fairly anti religious. Im agnostic but if a friend took me secretly to a church rally, Id want to kill them
However you sound like a pompous ass, Let down some barriers and accept those around you and perhaps you may have more friends
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:19am)
Fri 02 Jul 10 (11:40am)
Wow - I was lost in this whole saga - the problem I have is why didn’t he just leave? I mean seriously, if you don’t want to be there, leave!
The way you talk about ‘indies’ - geez, for a 20 year old you sound like you are 100.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (11:57am)
Bossy - why on earth were you so nice to this asshat?!
But Devious he does not say he is religious, just that he has been raised with old fashioned values (except patience, kindness and acceptance it seems!)
Op, do this Emily chick a massive favour and never speak to her again. You sound like such a pompous jerk!
A comedian makes a joke about a politician and you get your knickers in a knot? Have you seen Tony Abbott in his speedos? It’s pretty funny.
You have a lot to learn about friendships buddy, writing a bitchy blog about a long time friend instead of talking to her? That doesn’t seem very nice or loyal!
Try to be a better person.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:46pm)
But Devious, I’d quite like to know what a frined is - or is Bossy writing with a Kiwi accent today??
You forgot spellcheck, haha sorry had to say it after you’ll get a million of the same message
All im curious about, is that really how you type before spellcheck??
Also, Emily sounds like a bitch, If she knows you are religious and took you to something fairly anti religious. Im agnostic but if a friend took me secretly to a church rally, Id want to kill them
However you sound like a pompous ass, Let down some barriers and accept those around you and perhaps you may have more friends
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:19am)
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:14am)
Correction:
Ok, i now realise he has known her for 13 years, not that she is 13 years old, ill cop a slaying for that i can tell...sigh:(
OP, Are you frikken KIDDING ME?! Learn to summarise, for pity’s sake.
Regardless of who is at fault, you paint yourself as an arrogant, superior, pain in the arse piece of bovine excrement, with a massive piece of male genitalia firmly attached to your forehead.
Pull the damn page down and get on with your life.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:20am)
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:10am)
Well said Miss A....
Im bloody confused though, how old is Emily now, if she is still 13, then what are you doing hanging with her???
And who the fuck is Jack??
And if your 19 and don’t like triple J, what the fuck is wrong with you???Tybalt was right, you are an idiot!!!
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:41am)
Yes, “summarise”. Look it up, learn what it means, and do it more often!
I read the story twice and still couldn’t make sense of it, for all the fluff and irrelevant details and words used for the sake of using words.
I did however manage to notice you are, as Miss A points out, and arrogant, superior pain in the arse. The way you bang on about your conservative views and upbringing, your many fans on facebook, and your views of greenies and liberal thinkers all reeks of arrogance. Get over yourself.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (11:04am)
*like*
Yes, Arrogant is *one* word that springs to mind....
OP I’ll give you a F for the wordiness of that essay, surely your Uni lecturers have mentioned word limits to you at some point?? What is this, your thesis??
Let it go already, say sorry and get over yourself. Oh, but dont accept Emily’s word on events in future, google it yourself in advance!
Fri 02 Jul 10 (11:15am)
Well said.
And my eyes are literally burning and watering from reading this incessent babble.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:10pm)
Well said Miss A. I fully agree.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:21pm)
I agree
I coundn’t finish reading it! After paragraph 5 all I got was blah blah blah......
The long and short of it OP is: You are a pretentious, stuck up and long winded douche bag. Now you may be happy being that way but let’s not pretend otherwise, ok?
You went along to a gathering and acted like a petulant brat the entire time and still seem sulky about it months later.
She is upset about this to the point of depression, so as Bossy says . . .no dilemma, pull it down. You claim to be religious and yet you can’t see what the right thing to do here is? What the hell is wrong with you?
Also, how can you be offended by atheists having a go at Good Friday when you yourself were going out for food on Good Friday . . . do you read your bible? It’s a day supposed to be minimal eating and no meat. You spazz.
Wow, I wish I knew ‘Emily’ so that I could reassure her that she did nothing wrong and that you are the world biggest . . . .UGH!
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:20am)
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:00am)
...and the Bible passage about minimal eating , no meat, and “Good Friday” is...?
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:13am)
And you would vote ? labor
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:18pm)
Pretty sure the OP didn’t say he was religious, pretty sure that he said he was brought up with “old fashioned beliefs/old conservative morals” or something like that. Please lets not put them all in the same bag.
OP, surely if she had told you a little about the gig, even where it was going to be, you could’ve googled it yourself and then made an informed choice NOT TO GO...or alternatively, decided to leave? i don’t understand why you would choose to stay in a place where
1) you were clearly very uncomfortable with the content of the day
2) you were clearly very uncomfortable with the people around you
3) you were very hungry and getting grumpier
4) you had little consideration for other people around you and chose to interfere with their time by being on your mobile (are you like that at the movies??)
5) you sat and got angrier and angrier, potentially creating some kind of medical issues (brain snap? gall stones? okay, wee bit dramatic, but staying in a place where you get in this kind of emotional state instead of choosing to leave says a little bit about how you choose to manage your emotions, and its seemingly not healthy!!)
it doesn’t take much to say to ‘emily’ that you really want to know more about the gig in advance so you can decide if its for you. it doesn’t make you a bad friend to leave. however, i don’t think that you and i would be friends, seeing as your way of ‘venting’ includes being completely passive/aggressive by putting your ‘vent’ in a place where i (emily) would be sure to see it, as well as people we are both connected to. how bout next time, you man up, and have the conversation (non-judegementally if you can) in person, instead of spewing vitriol all over the net for the world to see??? that, in my opinion, would make you a much better friend…
That gave it away for me. Good troll though, I actually read the whole thing.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:22am)
I hope this doesn’t come off as cyber bullying, but you sound like a twat. I feel like I deserve a medal for reading he whole thing.
I’d be annoyed too if my friends dragged me off to a wanky Triple J lefty extravaganza, so I can relate to you on that level. I can’t even stand to watch Good News Week now for the same reason. I don’t think it was nice of your friend to “trick” you into doing something she knew you wouldn’t normally choose to do yourself.
The overall tone of your letter is a little too holier-than-thou for me. I can’t see anywhere that you’ve admitted to being anything less than perfect. Guess what kid - we ALL have failings and shortcomings and you’re no better than anyone else.
You gossip behind your friend’s back, you repeat what’s been told to you in confidence, you refuse to admit being wrong and you disregard the feelings of others. Your long and articulate letter wasn’t written craftily enough to hide those faults. Just something for you to think about maybe?
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:23am)
Fri 02 Jul 10 (01:02pm)
Chips, have I proposed to you today?
Pseudo-intellectuals hurt my head on a Friday, stop being so pretentious for Christ’s sake!
Ask her out for some fruit cake and enjoy it together, we all know you love it!
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:26am)
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:35am)
I bet he wears a beret too!
TL;DR ....
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:28am)
Bossy it looks as though you answered this one after a few glasses of wine! So many typos!
To the OP - get over yourself. Bossy is right. Apologise. Just because you don’t think you did anything wrong isn’t an excuse. You hurt her feelings, you can apologise for that. Saying sorry to someone for hurting their feelings (even if unintentionally) won’t hurt you. Except perhaps your ego, but that could do with a bit of deflating. What is it with you conservatives and not being able to admit faults or apologise? Geez.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:29am)
Bossy, you did well to read all that.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:29am)
Wow, you sir are a GIRL. Reading that was the biggest waste of time… you ruined my Friday morning…
I might have to write a blog now…
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:29am)
Ok, actually read the entirety of your letter.
Let’s see:
You get invited to a show you assumed would be something different to what it actually was.
At said show, you obviously judge those around you and threaten to make a scene to the extent that your friends have to ask you to tone it down.
Then at said show, everyone appears to enjoy themselves but you. You sit and stew on your discontent and pretty much isolate yourself from the whole situation.
Your friend sees that you hate it there, and are bringing everyone down, and asks you to leave if you are not enjoying yourself.
You leave and then stew on your discontent and feelings of victimisation.
In your egocentric self-centred-awesomeness, you decide it was your friends fault you had a sh*t time by not being clear on what the show was.
You then go on to write on your blog how much you disliked the situation. You probably put some kind of self-centred showmans shock-jock-styled post in an attempt to ilicit support for your cause, and ridicule against your friend.
Your friend finds it and feels insulted, and emails you to try and resolve the issue.
Instead of understanding her side of the story and how much of a f*cking idiot you are, you proceed to give her the typical self-centred-tyrant-mathematician-wannabe-god speach of:
x + y = i’m right and you’re wrong.
You probably repeated the same sh*t over and over.
Then you decide to tell your friends who I understand are also her friends, about how little you think of Emily, and then give them the speach of:
x + y = Emily is wrong so she is so stupid, you should ignore her too.
Then, you get some info from Emily’s mum who would have known you almost 2 decades telling you that Emily is contemplating suicide because of your little blog, and she is thinking of contacting the authories.
STOP.
Ok, this is how f*cking stupid you are:
You’re friend of 13 years’ mum who has also known you personally since you were a young child,
IS TELLING YOU THAT HER DAUGHTER IS CONTEMPLATING SUICIDE BECAUSE OF YOU AND SHE IS CONTEMPLATING CONTACTING THE AUTHORITIES TO HAVE THEM CHARGE YOU!
And all you can do is then do the:
x + y = emily is overreacting, i’m right and she really shouldn’
t take it to heart.
Are you crazy?
Do you idolise serial killers?
Do you get a tingle in your groin over how little you care about others and how superior you are to human emotion or other people for that matter?
Here’s telling it like it is to you buddy:
If she kills herself, it’s on YOUR HANDS. Have fun sleeping on that.
Because you’re young you’ll probably rationalise and separate yourself from it by telling yourself
x + y = emily shouldn’t have killed herself, her actions are her own, she should have been raised better or taught to take a joke. She shouldn’t have lied about the comedy show.
But, I can tell you, in 5 - 10 - 15 years time you will realise what a low piece of sh*t you were, and you will beg and plead to God to forgive you for how you acted.
F*cking little prat.
The world doesn’t need people like you, let along need people like you studying. You should be isolated to an island unable to interact with anyont but yourself.
But the funny thing is, that would probably be an ideal situation for you, an island by yourself. The only problem would be you wouldn’t have anyone to “impress”.
Lastly, if you write like that in your essays, I would expect an F. My eyes were bleeding before the 3rd paragraph.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:31am)
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:15am)
Couldn’t have said it better myself. I don’t know if it really matters what we all say, because by the sounds of it the OP is an expert at rationalising so that the world is wrong, and he is right.
What I love is that the one part of the story he probably can’t really rationalise away is the part he’s really skimmed over. There’s something in there about maybe possibly doing something with mates on facebook that maybe possibly could have been construed as being mean, but hey, it was just a prank right?
I’m pretty sure that THAT is the important part of the story, and the reason the OP is being accused of cyber bullying. Because one blog entry wouldn’t do it. But several things together… that would make a difference. But I’m sure it was all just a misunderstanding, right OP? Kind of like Emily taking you to an event that you apparently didn’t like was probably just a big misunderstanding? Oh sorry, she did that deliberately to insult you, right?
And I really do have to laugh at how thoroughly the OP rolls himself. He is so loyal that he can’t stand Emily saying bad things about his friends… so he tells his friends what she’s saying. Yes, that’s the loyal thing to do… And writing about a friend in a public blog? That’s definitely being loyal. Heaven forbid he spoke to her about it personally!
OP, all these problems your having retaining friends? This is why. Go and show this letter to a therapist. It speaks for itself.
And the best part of this whole saga… Emily was just trying to be nice, organising an outing for her friends. Do you do that often, OP? What was to stop you googling the event, if you were so interested? Or just asking her for more details? And it seems that none of your other friends had an issue with the event. Would you have preferred she didn’t ask you to go, assuming you wouldn’t be interested? Or would you then have written a blog explaining how mean Emily was for excluding you?
Oh, and changing their names in a blog to ‘protect their privacy’ doesn’t really work when all your friends read the blog, because it doesn’t take much to work out who you’re talking about!
Honestly, grow up!
Bossy, I think this Fruitcake is burnt.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (10:58am)
Cheers for the summery Tybalt, never could make it thru long letters.
But yeah this guys sounds like an opinionated douche, Tucker Max‘s little brother perhaps?
Fri 02 Jul 10 (11:05am)
Right back at ya. Didn’t read the OP’s blog and certainly won’t waste my time reading your comments - my eyes were bleeding before the 3rd paragraph!
Fri 02 Jul 10 (11:45am)
So much win in this post - no more responses are necessary
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:23pm)
This pretty much sums up my thoughts. Thanks Tybalt you just saved me some time :D
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:53pm)
“Because you’re young you’ll probably rationalise and separate yourself from it by telling yourself
x + y = emily shouldn’t have killed herself, her actions are her own, she should have been raised better or taught to take a joke.”
Which is well said and really quite funny Tybalt, since this whole thing seems to have arisen from OP not be able to take a joke in the first place...a joke that wasn’t even at HIS expense!
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:56pm)
Spot on tybalt. So glad i didnt read the entire blog. Id just end up pissed that i wasted my morning reading it.
Wow, you sir are a GIRL. Reading that was the biggest waste of time… you ruined my Friday morning…
I might have to write a blog now…
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:32am)
Wowsers! That was quite an email.
I have a feeling that the topic of cyber-bullying will be very relevant to a number of the responses you receive on this blog today, especially as you’re such a self-centred asshat.
Delete the blog posting. Delete the offensive postings on your Facebook page (and any you made on Emily’s Facebook page). APOLOGISE to Emily.
Take the necessary steps to recognise that you are not the centre of the universe and that everything does not resolve around your personal interests and your growling stomach.
Also recognise that you have free will and are therefore not required to attend gatherings which you find repugnant. If you find yourself at such a repugnant gathering, exercise your free will to leave without being a complete asshat about your dislike of the event.
In a way, I’m almost hopeful that someone finds your blog with your “rants and comments of politics and pop culture” and posts the link on here because it may make entertaining reading on this dreary Friday, but the “comments” to your letter will probably be even more entertaining.
Good luck to Emily!
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:33am)
OP, sorry I didn’t finish reading your rant so I probably shouldn’t comment...but I can’t help myself.
Are you 19 going on 2 or 19 going on 200? I can’t work it out. On one hand you’re talking about people your own age as if you were my grandfather, and on the other hand you a sooking like an infant.
Move on. Move into a retirement home where your comments will be appreciated.
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:34am)
You’re a pathetic piece of trash who will not admit to his own mistakes whilst spewing venomus bile about the perceived wrong doing of others to all and sundry who’ll listen to you. I’m not exactly sure what old fashioned values you’ve been brought up with but in the old days when someone had a problem with another person they used to communicate with them to get it resolved, not hide behind a friggen keyboard with their mates and slander them until the point they threaten self harm. You’d do well to buy a mirror and look at the person in the otherside you might not like what you see though.
On a side note you spell checker may be rooted Bossy.
Cheers
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:40am)
Fri 02 Jul 10 (12:01pm)
Like
...why did you make so many typos, Bossy?
Fri 02 Jul 10 (08:42am)