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Monday, 11 February 2008 |
 The Australian cricket team has taken exception to Harbajhan Singh’s
alleged comments about Andrew Symonds being a monkey, and told the
Indian tourists in no uncertain terms that in this country, racial slurs are unacceptable
when uttered by anyone other than Tony Greig.
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Thursday, 13 September 2007 |
 Rugby League fans were shocked this week, by the
unbelievable revelation that an overpaid, understimulated sportsman with plenty
of free time had experimented with drugs. "I can't believe it," said Newcastle
Knights fan Bill Adams. "Who would've thought a footballer would be anything
but a moral paragon?"
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Monday, 30 July 2007 |
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 Iraq’s football team has won its first ever major trophy after
defeating Saudi Arabia in the finals of this year’s Asian Football Cup,
and ecstatic Baghdad residents diverted their regular gunfire into the
air in celebration.
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Friday, 25 May 2007 |
 The Australian Government's call for Ricky Ponting's side to abandon
its tour to Zimbabwe has been echoed by their opponents. "We've
suffered enough in this country without having to get thrashed by
Australia again," captain Prosper Utseya said. "In my view, being made to face Brett Lee when you've only made the
team because of a racially biased selection policy is cruel and unusual
punishment."
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Tuesday, 24 April 2007 |
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 Fresh from his
work with fashion designers Giorgio Armani and Paspale Pearls, Ian
Thorpe is now consulting with a group of high-end European chemists to
design a new range of stimulants "for the modern man". The new
range of drugs will include "Thorpedo" and "gold medal"
branded ecstasy tablets suitable for "parties, nightclubs and any
other situation where people need their performance enhanced."
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